11 year old wearing coat

[Anonymous]

My 11 year old has insisted on wearing his coat all day every day the past couple months. I tried getting him new hoodies for Christmas, but he still ends up in his coat. He says he’s cold, meanwhile my 5yo prefers to only wear shorts. Anyone else? I feel like his teachers must think our house is an igloo or something.

[Anonymous]

Does it matter? If he is comfortable and happy let it be.

[Anonymous]

Turn up the heat?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does it matter? If he is comfortable and happy let it be.

This. Why do you care? Kids are weird.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I don’t necessarily care, but I am a bit concerned it’s related to an anxiety issue or something sensory. Our house is warm, usually set to 74 degrees during the day.

[Anonymous]

My kid won’t wear a coat so count yourself lucky!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I don’t necessarily care, but I am a bit concerned it’s related to an anxiety issue or something sensory. Our house is warm, usually set to 74 degrees during the day.

Does he have special needs? Is he unable to communicate effectively about discomfort or anxiety? If not, I wouldn't worry about it. It's not like "consistent coat wearing" if the first ominous sign of anything.

My 12 year old, who does have mild SN and is anxious, typically kept his winter jacket on all day every day when school was in session last year. It's a super cozy jacket. And actually more than one kid in the class liked to wear their hood up, either to be cool or because it kind of blocked out sounds and other stuff. It's a private school without a strict dress code, and the teacher was fine with it.

Maybe it just feels nice?

[Anonymous]

I don’t think this is at that strange- kids often have a favorite item they wear over and over (heck so do I!)

My 12yo DD wears the same hoodie all day probably 4 days/wk. She is mostly distance learning (is in person 2 days/wk) so I don’t really care. If she was wearing it out of the house I’d make her wash it more often/change things up. She has plenty of hoodies (including the exact same hoodie in a different color)- she just prefers this one for whatever reason.

I don’t think it’s that weird. He’s probably comfy.

[Anonymous]

It's probably a comfort item. He can't really walk around with a blankie or stuffy at 11 without being teased, but a coat is no big deal.

[Anonymous]

At around Thanksgiving, my 10 year old DD decided it was pyjama day every day.

So she's been wearing a new set of pyjamas every day. I'm fine with it, because they're actually really nice pjs her grandparents buy her, in plush cotton velvet from Petit Bateau, and she not only has her own, but she also has her brother's hand-me-downs, so she's never going to run out!

[Anonymous]

It may well be an anxiety issue and wearing the coat is making him feel safe. My DS did this in preschool, he insisted on having his coat on, hood up, zipped to his chin every single day even when the days were weirdly hot before coming outside for pick up. The preschool teacher would apologize and tell me he'd insisted. It was fine. It is a minor manifestation of anxiety. And the best thing you can do is support him and not make it a big deal.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I do have another kid with pretty severe special needs. 11yo is my oldest, and I thought many of his quirks were typical when he was younger (super sensitive to light, now obvious low tone issues, etc). We’ve had him evaluated for ADHD twice, and even tried medication, but it had the opposite of the intended affect. He is a serious nail biter, and I read somethings a few weeks ago about anxiety that aligned very much with what he’s got going on. The coat wearing might be further evidence (in which case I’m leaning towards possible therapy) or just a weird tween thing. I haven’t said anything to him about it beyond asking him to remove it if he’s helping me cook or something since it’s super bulky.

[Anonymous]

Maybe he is channeling Liam Gallagher of Oasis’s look. Anorak every day, no matter the weather.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I do have another kid with pretty severe special needs. 11yo is my oldest, and I thought many of his quirks were typical when he was younger (super sensitive to light, now obvious low tone issues, etc). We’ve had him evaluated for ADHD twice, and even tried medication, but it had the opposite of the intended affect. He is a serious nail biter, and I read somethings a few weeks ago about anxiety that aligned very much with what he’s got going on. The coat wearing might be further evidence (in which case I’m leaning towards possible therapy) or just a weird tween thing. I haven’t said anything to him about it beyond asking him to remove it if he’s helping me cook or something since it’s super bulky.

Maybe they don't need so much testing and therapy. That can make a kid anxious because you're telling them ultimately there's something wrong with them. Most kids with anxiety are extremely bright and it is a manifestation of that. It sounds like you suffer from anxiety about this, so maybe lighten up a bit generally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I do have another kid with pretty severe special needs. 11yo is my oldest, and I thought many of his quirks were typical when he was younger (super sensitive to light, now obvious low tone issues, etc). We’ve had him evaluated for ADHD twice, and even tried medication, but it had the opposite of the intended affect. He is a serious nail biter, and I read somethings a few weeks ago about anxiety that aligned very much with what he’s got going on. The coat wearing might be further evidence (in which case I’m leaning towards possible therapy) or just a weird tween thing. I haven’t said anything to him about it beyond asking him to remove it if he’s helping me cook or something since it’s super bulky.

These things are genetically inheritable, OP, so it's not surprising that your 11 year old might be mildly or moderately affected by inattentive ADHD, or anxiety or something else, if his relatives are too. My son with diagnosed inattentive ADHD and borderline high-functioning autism has low tone with poor coordination/motor skills, low processing speed, sensory aversions (needs soft textures as well) and, we noticed that when he's "optimally" medicated for his ADHD, his rigid habits increase to OCD proportions! Fun times...

So keep an eye on the little things, not because they're concerning in themselves separately, but because taken all together, they are indicative of a larger picture.