Text thread screw-up - revealed a bar mitzvah

[Anonymous]

A close friend's son is having a bar mitzvah next month and a very small group of his parents' friends is invited to partake virtually.
Beyond this friend group is a slightly larger circle. We have text threads going with both groups.

My friend was stressed about the invite she chose and brought it up to our (small) group in person yesterday. It arrived today and I texted to say how beautiful it was -- but I texted the larger group.

The party was definitely on the hush hush as she didn't want anyone to feel left out.

What do I do?? I can't rescind the text. CRAP.

[Anonymous]

Wow that really sucks.

Apologize profusely to your friend. Chances are people would've found out one way or another but this text makes it awkward and your friend might have to explain now if people ask or still think they're getting invited.

Be more careful.

[Anonymous]

Wow supper awkward. I would profusely apologize to her. Send flowers. Not sure what else.

[Anonymous]

Wow - very careless.

[Anonymous]

It’s a virtual party. who would want to even do that.

[Anonymous]

That sucks. And I would totally do that. And I would feel like complete horseshit.

However if I were the host I would be annoyed but I would not be that upset. I knew that there was a risk to this by having a small group. A profuse apology is really all you need. And then just move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s a virtual party. who would want to even do that.

Good point. The uninvited are probably thankful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s a virtual party. who would want to even do that.

Good point. The uninvited are probably thankful.

+1 certainly apologize for the oversight, but I would be relieved not to attend.

[Anonymous]

I would hate to attend such an online "party", as would most people, but the sting of not being invited will still bother a few unreasonable folk. You need to apologize profusely by phone and send flowers.

And please, be careful in the future.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow - very careless.

Wow - very callous reply

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A close friend's son is having a bar mitzvah next month and a very small group of his parents' friends is invited to partake virtually.
Beyond this friend group is a slightly larger circle. We have text threads going with both groups.

My friend was stressed about the invite she chose and brought it up to our (small) group in person yesterday. It arrived today and I texted to say how beautiful it was -- but I texted the larger group.

The party was definitely on the hush hush as she didn't want anyone to feel left out.

What do I do?? I can't rescind the text. CRAP.

Parents hate bar mitzvahs under ordinary circumstamces. Virtual even worse.. trust me, no one cares.

[Anonymous]

No one cares. Virtual bar mitzvahs are excruciatingly. Those not invited will be relieved.

[Anonymous]

Virtual parties are a new form of torture much like the crazy drive by birthday party.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Virtual parties are a new form of torture much like the crazy drive by birthday party.

+1

[Anonymous]

I know the feeling OP. It is awful. Trust though that it will blow over. Apologize and move on.

On the underlying facts though, it is a little unfair of her to even ask you to keep it a secret, and for her to want it to be. You all are close enough to have an active group text going, but she expected this to NEVER get out? She never wanted to be able to talk about her kid's bar mitzvah openly and have to keep secrets around it? Weird. And if it is virtual, why limit the guest list? What was the point?