kindergartener can't stop touching things in class

[Anonymous]

DC keeps touching things even when told not to. He kept touching the radiator compartment door while sitting during circle time until it broke...not once but several times. Eventually he was moved away from the radiator. He has a deep sensory need to touch things. We are sick and tired of hearing complaints from the school regarding this because we just don't know what to do. We have talked to him numerous times already. We begged him not to touch those kind of things. But he can't help himself he says. If I give him a squishy ball will it be enough? I'm afraid he will bounce it around and disrupt class. what on earth can I do?

[Anonymous]

Hmmmm...it seems to me the school is not doing a very good job of dealing with this issue if your child was not moved away from the radiator until the door broke. An experienced teacher would have been able to distract him before that happened. Why is the school complaining to you? It sounds like they need to develop strategies for dealing with a high activity child other than telling him not to do something. Same for you with the begging. I'd want to know more about his teacher. Also wonder if he's ready for kindergarten?

[Anonymous]

If the school will allow you to give him a squishy ball, try it. I also used a necklace for one of my sons when he was having issues.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Well, the teacher has been unsupportive from the beginning. She has complained about him to the Head of School incessantly...he can't get his morning routine down yet, he keeps playing with the doorknobs everywhere, he is inattentive, etc..etc..So finally a checklist was used for that routine and within a few days he had that routine down. Then we provided more therapy and his door perseveration diminished significantly. Even his inattentiveness is less of aproblem now. But in c ircle time he has now been removed from the radiator to a different spot. But he has low muscle tone so he keeps flopping over or putting his head down to the floor. She keeps telling him to sit up straight. They do try to place him near a wall so that he can get some back support from that wall apparently. We know the teacher has asked for the school psychologist to observe him and has asked for the Head to come in and observe him on many occasions. We have essentially been counseled out of this school because of DC's behavior. He is not being invited back to the school. The school does not seem to know how to handle his sensory needs and in some instances neither do I.

[Anonymous]

My DS perseverated with doors and he has an ASD, extremely high functioning. We got him a toy that was a box with lots of different kind of doors and fasteners and he used that in the classroom. A squishy ball won't do it.

You should have him evaluated by a developmental pediatrician or child psychiatrist if you haven't already. This is all not normal (though goodness, the school should be more supportive.) He has other red flags for an ASD (inattentiveness, low muscle tone). Another possibility with perseverative behavior is OCD. The thing is, he needs a supportive school and the only way to really know what he needs is to have a global evaluation (NOT an OT evaluation).

[Anonymous]

Even though it's a hard process, I bet you'll find another school that's more accepting and helpful. But avoid WES. They often counsel out kids with special needs, even minor issues. That's one thing that really bothers me about the private schools. They boast that they cater to different learning styles and give individual attention, but in reality they don't.

[Anonymous]

HOLY COW OP! Your DS sounds like mine.

He is now in 1st grade and still having issues with not being able to keep his hands to himself and understanding "social queues" (sp?). He is not ASD, rather he's a sensory seeker with ADHD/Inattentive type. And by the way, the most popular kid in class, very well loved thank goodness.
His inability to focus has made it difficult for him to learn, although he's plenty smart. Just lots of things distract him. I fought it, but we finally put him on meds a few weeks ago. The meds are for ADHD. I hate meds, but I hate the idea of his not being able to learn and succeed in school - which would do more damage than any medication ever could - IMHO.

We were in a catholic school last year and asked to NOT return as the school was not equipped with knowing how to manage him. Young teachers etc. He is too main-stream for schools like Lab, but has too many needs for a small private. So we are in public, starting OT soon.
He was in the head master's office every day last year, everyone in school knew that he was in the principal's office every day - horrible for self esteem. The school did a really good job of making us feel like total outsiders so that we would not even entertain the idea of returning.

Let us know if you find a school that welcomes your DS. I'm curious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Even though it's a hard process, I bet you'll find another school that's more accepting and helpful. But avoid WES. They often counsel out kids with special needs, even minor issues. That's one thing that really bothers me about the private schools. They boast that they cater to different learning styles and give individual attention, but in reality they don't.

Unless the private school is meant for children with learning disabilities, the private school is not likelly to equate "learning styles" to mean devleopmental delays or seruiys learning disablities.

I know it can be a tough pill to swallow but the private schools in this area are meant for the students who are "normal" fuctioning. They might be able to tolerate minor learning disablities but anything else is not going to be.

Too be frank, I don't want them to because I am paying a lot of money for my child to be there and have individual attention not individual attention that is all focused on one child's needs. And I say this as a parent with a child in a very expensive private school, that does have minor issues. I am seeking outside help for her but I am prepared to move her to another school if the outside therapy is not helpful (so far it has been). Its not fair to the other students and its not fair to her bc they really will not want her there in the long run.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Even though it's a hard process, I bet you'll find another school that's more accepting and helpful. But avoid WES. They often counsel out kids with special needs, even minor issues. That's one thing that really bothers me about the private schools. They boast that they cater to different learning styles and give individual attention, but in reality they don't.

Unless the private school is meant for children with learning disabilities, the private school is not likelly to equate "learning styles" to mean devleopmental delays or seruiys learning disablities.

I know it can be a tough pill to swallow but the private schools in this area are meant for the students who are "normal" fuctioning. They might be able to tolerate minor learning disablities but anything else is not going to be.

Too be frank, I don't want them to because I am paying a lot of money for my child to be there and have individual attention not individual attention that is all focused on one child's needs. And I say this as a parent with a child in a very expensive private school, that does have minor issues. I am seeking outside help for her but I am prepared to move her to another school if the outside therapy is not helpful (so far it has been). Its not fair to the other students and its not fair to her bc they really will not want her there in the long run.

Actually, I think if the school accepts the student it's because they believe the student will succeed in their environment. That's why they have committees with great experience in making these decisions. Presumably they have more expertise on the subject than the average opinionated person in the parking lot.

[Anonymous]

You might try to see whether if he needs stimulation w/ his hands to play w/ something or whether a bouncy cushion could give him the sensory input he craves. My son has a special allowance to chew gum when he has a high sensory needs day. Southpaw enterprises is used by OT therapists for equipment--you might find something that works for him here. http://www.southpawenterprises.com/Default.aspx

[Anonymous]

There actually are mainstreams schools that work with children with differences. MClean, where my son goes, is fabulous. I've heard St. Patrick's and Burgundy farm are two others that are more open and flexible. Most privates do not want kids with differences, but not all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Even though it's a hard process, I bet you'll find another school that's more accepting and helpful. But avoid WES. They often counsel out kids with special needs, even minor issues. That's one thing that really bothers me about the private schools. They boast that they cater to different learning styles and give individual attention, but in reality they don't.

Unless the private school is meant for children with learning disabilities, the private school is not likelly to equate "learning styles" to mean devleopmental delays or seruiys learning disablities.

I know it can be a tough pill to swallow but the private schools in this area are meant for the students who are "normal" fuctioning. They might be able to tolerate minor learning disablities but anything else is not going to be.

Too be frank, I don't want them to because I am paying a lot of money for my child to be there and have individual attention not individual attention that is all focused on one child's needs. And I say this as a parent with a child in a very expensive private school, that does have minor issues. I am seeking outside help for her but I am prepared to move her to another school if the outside therapy is not helpful (so far it has been). Its not fair to the other students and its not fair to her bc they really will not want her there in the long run.

Our school caters to 'different learning styles' and that means 8, 10, or 14 year old kids who literally get pulled out in the middle of their day for special tutoring or physical therapy or need help because they can't remember which books to bring home or how to organize their schoolwork. Granted, physical therapy isn't a mental disability, it's a physical disability. But kids who need special tutoring or can't organize their homework at the age of 14 should perhaps not be in that school to begin with either. It's a burden on the school resources and it, too, is an expenditure that you are paying for even though your child is 'normal' and learning normally. I honestly believe it's not that you are worried it will take time away from your normal child. If that's the case, I'd be happy to pay out of pocket for an aid exclusively for my child. I bet you would not want that would you though? I think kids with issues carry a negative stigma that some schools want nothing to do with. For all those people who feel this way, honestly, I think the best thing that could happen to them is to actually have a special needs or high needs child. Try walking in the shoes of a special needs child or the parents of a special needs child first. Being banished to separate schools simply because a child has an issue or two is demoralizing for children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:HOLY COW OP! Your DS sounds like mine.

He is now in 1st grade and still having issues with not being able to keep his hands to himself and understanding "social queues" (sp?). He is not ASD, rather he's a sensory seeker with ADHD/Inattentive type. And by the way, the most popular kid in class, very well loved thank goodness.
His inability to focus has made it difficult for him to learn, although he's plenty smart. Just lots of things distract him. I fought it, but we finally put him on meds a few weeks ago. The meds are for ADHD. I hate meds, but I hate the idea of his not being able to learn and succeed in school - which would do more damage than any medication ever could - IMHO.

We were in a catholic school last year and asked to NOT return as the school was not equipped with knowing how to manage him. Young teachers etc. He is too main-stream for schools like Lab, but has too many needs for a small private. So we are in public, starting OT soon.
He was in the head master's office every day last year, everyone in school knew that he was in the principal's office every day - horrible for self esteem. The school did a really good job of making us feel like total outsiders so that we would not even entertain the idea of returning.

Let us know if you find a school that welcomes your DS. I'm curious.

OP here. That just about sums up my child. He's very bright. Has ADHD, and has sensory regulatory issues. But he just isn't ASD.

To previous poster who suggested we see a dev ped because he sounds like her own ASD child. We did see a dev ped at Childrens, we saw Kennedy Krieger, also saw Greenspan and all said he's not ASD.

[Anonymous]

Take a look at McLean OP. It might be a very nice fit. Burgundy Farms is lovely too if you are in VA.

[Anonymous]

21:28 here - OP, We too went to Kennedy Krieger and they confirmed NO ASD, and that was good enough for me. Frankly, having that as a label only decreases our kids' options...and really puts them in a seperate category that no school wants to deal with.

We have applied to McLean, waiting to hear.