How much does your spouse influence your personal style?

[Anonymous]

When I read this quote on the Dansko discussion:

No matter how much you spend, clunky and heavy shoes will never make you look good. On the other hand, a sleek shoe with some kind of heel always makes the legs look longer and more shapely.

...my immediate thought was: I wear clunky shoes because my husband thinks that clunky shoes are sexy. And it got me wondering: how much do this forum's readers follow their spouse's favorites regarding clothing vs. ignoring them?

For most of my daily wardrobe (jeans & sweaters), I don't care at all what he thinks. But when I buy something new--especially if I'm not that confident it's a smart idea--his compliment of it means the world to me. And I find myself looking for similar items that he might also like. And while I love my heels, I'm still on the lookout for clunky shoes, based on a comment he made in 2000.

[Anonymous]

OP, I'm the poster you quoted above. Have to say that my husband rarely comments on what I wear - just always thinks I look nice. I, though, always dress for myself - what makes me happy, what makes me feel good and what works for the occasion. Have to say that I rarely feel good in overly casual clothing - makes me feel like a schlumadunkus.

And I love heels because they make me tall, make my legs look longer and I feel thinner.

Don't they say that women dress for other women and really not at all for men?

[Anonymous]

I definitely think DH's taste plays a role, but only to an extent. If I dressed exactly as he wanted I would look like a prostitute from the Jersey Shore in the late 80s. But I do think of him when I dress for going out with him. I'll treat him to a super short skirt now and then and once in a while go out without a bra to drive him crazy.

I also keep his favorite colors in mind when I'm deciding on an article of clothing.

DH will let me know if he really hates something that I just bought and I will usually return it.

[Anonymous]

It bothers me to admit this, but DH's opinion really does matter. If he finds an outfit attractive, he is more affectionate. If the outfit is frumpy, no physical affection. I like getting affection from my DH! and the more he likes an outfit, the more confident I am about my appearance.

For the most part, he likes classy outfits and his opinion has, for the most part, helped me progress from grunge to classy and occasionally glam.

[Anonymous]

thanks to dh's "why do girls wear pajamas out in public?" comments i stopped ever wearing sweats or workout gear unless i am actually working out. that's about as far as his opinion has gotten to my wardrobe though. the few times he's tried to buy me clothes i've either not worn then more than a handful of times or returned them.

[Anonymous]

not one bit

And I wouldn't have it any other way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:not one bit

And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Charming.

[Anonymous]

He really likes gray clothes, so I have slowly bought more and more grays over the past few years.

[Anonymous]

There is a significant age difference between DH and me, which I always thought explained why he pushed me to get very classic elegant clothes, instead of the trendy, more revealing ones I like.

Over the years I notice we are slowly reconciling our tastes - he is now OK with short shorts in summer, I accept old-fashioned flowery buttoned blouses occasionally.

And vice-versa for his clothes: he dresses younger thanks to me.

[Anonymous]

not a whole lot. He liked my taste when we met, that's one of the reasons he fell in love with me. I haven't changed much, only acquired a few items that he said he would like to see me wear

[Anonymous]

I think it's fine to have somewhat of an influence with spouses as long as it's reciprocal. But I must admit I find it disconcerting that some only wear what their spouses like - including styles and colors that may not make them look their best. Unless your spouse has the same coloring as you, their favorite colors will almost never work on you.

A more interesting question - if you are dressing for your spouse in their colors and their style preferences, do you really feel good about what you are wearing?

[Anonymous]

My DH is very JCrew and I am very Old Navy yoga pants. I do dress more nicely than I otherwise would when we are going out in public -- not a bad thing. When I go places myself I wear the yoga pants. We all win.

[Anonymous]

I think we influence each other's style. We both try things out on each other. I think I have helped him wear younger, more fun clothes (more color, vintage tshirts, great jeans). My husband has great taste in work clothes, but a harder time with his casual wardrobe.

For me, I trust my style, but occasionaly, I like some feedback from him. Mainly if going out to something semi-formal or formal. For everyday, I pretty much know what I look good in and what I like to wear. My style is very eclectic and more funky than his. But I think he likes that about me. He is a conservative, I am pretty liberal. He is introverted, I am extroverted. He is a good saver, I am impulsive. Luckily, most of the time these differences balance each other out and we enjoy them!

[Anonymous]

The DH likes t-shirts, no makeup, and pony tails on women... I'm not sure how he fell in love with me since that is the opposite of my style.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:not one bit

And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Charming.

DH thinks so, too.

Thanks for the compliment!