Is it possible to feel attractive after having a baby?

[Anonymous]

If yes, how did you get to?

If not, how do you cope with not liking your body?

[Anonymous]

This won’t be your priority after birth. Getting sleep will be. I was a wreck from the neck down for about 2 years. Wearing makeup helped me feel slightly less disgusting, especially when I was dealing with incontinence and leaking breastmilk everywhere.

[Anonymous]

I got a really Bitchin haircut about six weeks post partum. And an excellent vibrator. Taking a shower took on a whole new meaning. That may sound wrong but good orgasms help your overall impression of yourself. For more practical thoughts just sleeping as much as you can getting a good bra once your boobs settle down. Buying clothes for the body you’re in, something pretty it doesn’t have to be what your size was before. Understand that your body just did something amazing and give yourself time to heal. And get that shower every day (even if suggestion 2 isn’t appealing), clean hair and a few minutes alone do wonders.

[Anonymous]

How soon?

I agree with PP that it’s very difficult and probably not a priority right away, when you are sleep deprived, bloody, milk leaking, etc. Plus IME the newborn stage is so consuming, you’re really thinking about the baby and not how you look.

My relationship with my body and appearance definitely changed after pregnancy, in positive ways. I did not expect it but I did become oddly proud of my body for creating my kids. And I was less concerned with imperfections. And I do feel attractive, and DH feels that way too. It just wasn’t as much of a priority in the newborn phase.

[Anonymous]

Totally agree that a good bra is a GAME CHANGER. Your body will be different. Even when I was my pre-pregnancy size again, my shape was different so lots of the clothes I owned looked bad, I needed a different cut of jeans, etc. High waist compression leggings are life. So are spanx.

This might sound weird but I look "like a mom" now and I always thought my mom was absultely beautiful and smelled so nice. I loved watching her get ready to go on dates with my dad, smelling her perfume, her skin was so soft when she hugged me. I tell myself no matter what my perception of myself is, my daughter will have similar memories with me and it lifts me up. My husband also genuinely finds me attractive still which helps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Totally agree that a good bra is a GAME CHANGER. Your body will be different. Even when I was my pre-pregnancy size again, my shape was different so lots of the clothes I owned looked bad, I needed a different cut of jeans, etc. High waist compression leggings are life. So are spanx.

This might sound weird but I look "like a mom" now and I always thought my mom was absultely beautiful and smelled so nice. I loved watching her get ready to go on dates with my dad, smelling her perfume, her skin was so soft when she hugged me. I tell myself no matter what my perception of myself is, my daughter will have similar memories with me and it lifts me up. My husband also genuinely finds me attractive still which helps.

I love this.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Put on eyeliner and lipstick. 30 seconds and great return on investment.

Like flylady says, dress to shoes every day. Well fitting bra. And give the baby to someone else regularly.

[Anonymous]

Yes, of course! But not in the first 6-12 months, especially if you're nursing. Get any pelvic floor issues fixed by a specialist. You don't have to pee yourself for life.

[Anonymous]

To me it wasn't about my body at all but my hair and just generally not looking polished or put together. After my second birth when I felt like I had more of a handle on things and wasn't just hit by a truck I put more effort in. Quick shocker rinse every morning and night, put on real clothes (I actually threw out my nasty sweatpants so I wouldn't be tempted!), two minute makeup routine etc.

I won't lie, your hair will be weird for a while. Do what you can

[Anonymous]

Not immediately after, but I felt like I was back to myself 3 months PP. I was about 7 pounds heavier than my PP weight 3 months after giving birth (I gained 37 pounds, but lost a lot of the weight pretty quickly after giving birth), so I could fit into my regular clothes. That helped a lot. I got back to my PP weight 6 months after giving birth (lost the last 7 pounds over 3 months) and my advice would be to focus less on weight loss and more on doing little things for yourself that make you feel pretty. I defined my attractiveness by the number on the scale and it made me miserable.

[Anonymous]

Not like, the day after. But by the time maternity leave was over? Totally. I didn't mind being a few pounds over my pre-pregnancy weight since I was nursing. I didn't mind that my hair was falling out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To me it wasn't about my body at all but my hair and just generally not looking polished or put together. After my second birth when I felt like I had more of a handle on things and wasn't just hit by a truck I put more effort in. Quick shocker rinse every morning and night, put on real clothes (I actually threw out my nasty sweatpants so I wouldn't be tempted!), two minute makeup routine etc.

I won't lie, your hair will be weird for a while. Do what you can

It helps a lot to get good haircuts on a regular basis. Find a stylist you like.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To me it wasn't about my body at all but my hair and just generally not looking polished or put together. After my second birth when I felt like I had more of a handle on things and wasn't just hit by a truck I put more effort in. Quick shocker rinse every morning and night, put on real clothes (I actually threw out my nasty sweatpants so I wouldn't be tempted!), two minute makeup routine etc.

I won't lie, your hair will be weird for a while. Do what you can

It helps a lot to get good haircuts on a regular basis. Find a stylist you like.

The ritual of having something done for yourself as important as getting a haircut or oh my gosh a pedicure. Being able to leave the house for a few hours solo is like heaven. It’s a reset that will remind you of who you are. It also may remind you how tired you are (or not).

[Anonymous]

My babies just sucked the fat right out of me. That plus carrying around a 10-20lb blob for a while gave me really great arms. Post-partum was the closest I ever came to looking like a fitness model. Now...my stomach skin looks like a melting candle, but it can't all be sunshine and roses.

[Anonymous]

Not immediately after but about a year out when I lost the majority of the weight, bought better fitting clothes, got my hair done and the hemorrhoids finally went away.