Ladies who had elective c-sections, how did you find an OB who agreed to it?

[Anonymous]

Hello everyone!

After much research (I am myself a nurse) I decided that I'd like to have my baby via scheduled c-section but haven't had the chance to bring that up during my first appointment because I somehow was afraid of being judged.

I reflected on that extensively and came to the conclusion that, as long as my decision is informed and with full awareness of the risks and benefits, nobody else should feel ethically entitled to force me to go through extra suffering just because they think so.

At this point, I'd like to collect ideas/recommendations of how to find an OB who won't shame me/judge me or intimidate me into changing my mind.

If you successfully delivered via scheduled c-section, what was your process?

[Anonymous]

I think as long as you're not using midwives this will not be particularly controversial. Just bring it up at your next appointment.

[Anonymous]

I fully support your decision to deliver how you want, your body your choice. But lol at "extra suffering". Trust me the c-section is not the easy way out. That's why they want to discourage it, not because they want you to suffer.

[Anonymous]

I had a c-section by request. I was really scared to ask my OB but she didn't blink. I am a Kaiser patient so it's not like I could shop around much for doctors. She did have me see a different OB in the practice to just document that it was my request and not her pushing it.

There were no issues and nobody gave me a hard time at any stage. I did not pay more, either.

[Anonymous]

doctors prefer it because it is much mor convenient and lucrative.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I fully support your decision to deliver how you want, your body your choice. But lol at "extra suffering". Trust me the c-section is not the easy way out. That's why they want to discourage it, not because they want you to suffer.

I’ve had babies both ways, and even with a long, difficult delivery I’d take the recovery for that one 100 times over the c section. In my experience you can have the pain of delivery and then it’s done or the pain of recovering from abdominal surgery while caring for a newborn. You’re just kicking the “extra suffering” can down the road.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I fully support your decision to deliver how you want, your body your choice. But lol at "extra suffering". Trust me the c-section is not the easy way out. That's why they want to discourage it, not because they want you to suffer.

I’ve had babies both ways, and even with a long, difficult delivery I’d take the recovery for that one 100 times over the c section. In my experience you can have the pain of delivery and then it’s done or the pain of recovering from abdominal surgery while caring for a newborn. You’re just kicking the “extra suffering” can down the road.

Yup. The fact that you need Percocet to recover from one but not the other tells you everything you need to know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I fully support your decision to deliver how you want, your body your choice. But lol at "extra suffering". Trust me the c-section is not the easy way out. That's why they want to discourage it, not because they want you to suffer.

I’ve had babies both ways, and even with a long, difficult delivery I’d take the recovery for that one 100 times over the c section. In my experience you can have the pain of delivery and then it’s done or the pain of recovering from abdominal surgery while caring for a newborn. You’re just kicking the “extra suffering” can down the road.

Yup. The fact that you need Percocet to recover from one but not the other tells you everything you need to know.

Uhh, talk to moms with severe pelvic floor trauma or 4th degree tears or who fracture tailbones, etc. Many women experience chronic pain from vaginal birth. Don’t assume everyone who delivers vaginally has an easy time. Many do but many do not. Signed, a mom who couldn’t sit for years without pain due to her preferable “vaginal” birth

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:doctors prefer it because it is much mor convenient and lucrative.

Actually it’s safer for the baby and far more controlled than a vaginal birth that most times are uncomplicated but when they aren’t can go off the rails—badly— in a matter of moments. But keep telling yourself that tired, outdated lie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I fully support your decision to deliver how you want, your body your choice. But lol at "extra suffering". Trust me the c-section is not the easy way out. That's why they want to discourage it, not because they want you to suffer.

I’ve had babies both ways, and even with a long, difficult delivery I’d take the recovery for that one 100 times over the c section. In my experience you can have the pain of delivery and then it’s done or the pain of recovering from abdominal surgery while caring for a newborn. You’re just kicking the “extra suffering” can down the road.

Yup. The fact that you need Percocet to recover from one but not the other tells you everything you need to know.

Uhh, talk to moms with severe pelvic floor trauma or 4th degree tears or who fracture tailbones, etc. Many women experience chronic pain from vaginal birth. Don’t assume everyone who delivers vaginally has an easy time. Many do but many do not. Signed, a mom who couldn’t sit for years without pain due to her preferable “vaginal” birth

I'm not assuming anything. Is your assertion that more women have a hard time with vaginal birth and recovery than c-sections? Because the data doesn't back that up. Of course there are bad experiences with both, but if vaginal deliveries were harder as a matter of course everyone would have a c-section.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:doctors prefer it because it is much mor convenient and lucrative.

Actually it’s safer for the baby and far more controlled than a vaginal birth that most times are uncomplicated but when they aren’t can go off the rails—badly— in a matter of moments. But keep telling yourself that tired, outdated lie.

God lord. Please provide some research probing c-sections are safer for the baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:doctors prefer it because it is much mor convenient and lucrative.

Actually it’s safer for the baby and far more controlled than a vaginal birth that most times are uncomplicated but when they aren’t can go off the rails—badly— in a matter of moments. But keep telling yourself that tired, outdated lie.

This is absolutely not true.

[Anonymous]

Just as you have made your informed decision, you can’t force a doctor to do an elective procedure. I don’t think they would care....but who knows. Congrats on your pregnancy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I fully support your decision to deliver how you want, your body your choice. But lol at "extra suffering". Trust me the c-section is not the easy way out. That's why they want to discourage it, not because they want you to suffer.

I’ve had babies both ways, and even with a long, difficult delivery I’d take the recovery for that one 100 times over the c section. In my experience you can have the pain of delivery and then it’s done or the pain of recovering from abdominal surgery while caring for a newborn. You’re just kicking the “extra suffering” can down the road.

Yup. The fact that you need Percocet to recover from one but not the other tells you everything you need to know.

Uhh, talk to moms with severe pelvic floor trauma or 4th degree tears or who fracture tailbones, etc. Many women experience chronic pain from vaginal birth. Don’t assume everyone who delivers vaginally has an easy time. Many do but many do not. Signed, a mom who couldn’t sit for years without pain due to her preferable “vaginal” birth

Right, and talk to moms that have had serious c section complications. There are seriously bad possible outcomes to both, but recovery for an uncomplicated c section can be a lot more difficult than a non complicated vaginal birth.

[Anonymous]

People stop. She's not asking for opinions about anything other than asking her OB.