Getting the 4 year old to bed

[Anonymous]

My almost 4 year old puts up SUCH a fight over bedtime. She was doing great prepandemic. Would nap 1.5 hours at daycare, then went to bed at 840 with no struggle. Then pandemic, and she stopped napping but she would go to bed at 8. Now she's back in daycare and napping for 1-1.5 hours there. But she will not even GO to bed until 9-915. She wakes up at 7-745 each morning. How do I at least get her to try to go to sleep at a normal time?

[Anonymous]

It's tough, but make sure she gets enough time outside and burning up energy

[Anonymous]

It's the nap...and it's a struggle that most parents go through. Daycares force naps because they need the break (I understand) but if the kid doesn't need one, then they stay up later. It's a losing battle with the daycare provider but it will eventually pass.

Sorry I have no real advice but it's a common issue.

[Anonymous]

Its totally the nap. She is not tired until 9/930 with a nap during the day. You either need to cut the nap somehow or be ok with a later bedtime
Napping was the reason we pulled our DD from daycare at age 4. They had to lay on their cot in the dark for 2 hours. She didnt have to sleep is what they told me but she has to lay quietly, 2 hours in the dark is crazy to expect a child to lay there awake.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My almost 4 year old puts up SUCH a fight over bedtime. She was doing great prepandemic. Would nap 1.5 hours at daycare, then went to bed at 840 with no struggle. Then pandemic, and she stopped napping but she would go to bed at 8. Now she's back in daycare and napping for 1-1.5 hours there. But she will not even GO to bed until 9-915. She wakes up at 7-745 each morning. How do I at least get her to try to go to sleep at a normal time?

OP, re-read your post and there's only one conclusion...it's the nap. Most parents with kids in daycare experience this. The nap is a requirement and you will have a hard time getting the providers to change. It's a constant struggle over who gets the downtime, you or the daycare. The daycare loves having the 1-2 hours of kids sleeping and some of them need it. However, the "one size fits all" approach doesn't work for the kids who no longer need a nap. You just have to get through this.

FWIW, we told our kid not to sleep during his nap time and it sort of worked out.

[Anonymous]

It’s the nap! We had the same problem with daycare. Sleeping kids are easier to handle so they encouraged naps and it screwed us every night and then DC was tired every morning and cranky.

I truly hated that about our daycare.

[Anonymous]

As others have said, it's definitely the nap.

Don't try to put a kid to bed who isn't tired. It never goes well.

[Anonymous]

Could have written this exactly for my 4.5 year old. We've talked to daycare about waking him up after an hour and they've been willing to do so. That helped a little bit. Mostly we've learned to allow him to play quietly in his room after 8pm and then lights out around 9:30. It avoids some of the power struggles that no one wants at that time of night.

[Anonymous]

Thanks everyone. I told her not to nap and I asked her teachers to limit her nap to an hour. I thought it was too big of a coincidence that she lost an hour of total sleep once the pandemic started. - OP.

[Anonymous]

My kids daycare allowed kids to read books instead of napping

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids daycare allowed kids to read books instead of napping

Mine does too but apparently she NEEDS the nap. They tried to wake her up after an hour and just couldn't. I'll ask them them to do it every day. one hour max. - op