Expensive Sport

[Anonymous]

But what if your kid genuinely has potential Olympic-level talent? I don't mean in the eyes of a delusional parent, but by coaches who have competed at that level. You would really deny your kid the opportunity to do that just to protect family schedules and be able to fund vacations?

[Anonymous]

Woah! There is a lot more to consider than just fancy vacations when expensive sports and activities are in the mix. There are necessities, bills, other kids, college, retirement, savings. A whole slew of things to consider. I'm sorry, but no matter how much kid wanted to do certain activities, I'd have to put my foot down and say no, they are too outrageously expensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Woah! There is a lot more to consider than just fancy vacations when expensive sports and activities are in the mix. There are necessities, bills, other kids, college, retirement, savings. A whole slew of things to consider. I'm sorry, but no matter how much kid wanted to do certain activities, I'd have to put my foot down and say no, they are too outrageously expensive.

+1. You guys must make a ton more than we do because there is no way we could spend $50K per year on a sport and still contribute to our retirements much less even fund a 529 for a state school which is our current approach.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DD is an equestrian. I'm about to spend $50,000 on a new horse that "might" last her 2 years before she's at the next level. Then there is the $6K saddles, etc. And, of course, the board and maintenance of said horse. It's ludicrous.

I didn't fully appreciate the cost when she started and had no idea she would ever be serious. We are lucky we can do that for her. She struggles in school, so it is her therapy (although pay for therapy, too).

I'll be honest. I kind of resent it, but lately, she has started to understand what it all costs and has been very grateful, so that helps.

So you are creating the undatable Horse Girl. Every college and college graduate knows to stay away from, and never date (seriously) since they are a little crazy, but man, they are great in .....

So I'm guessing you are a doctor / attorney / finance guy.

1. The boyfriend / husband will never be the priority.
2. The boyfriend / husband will never be able to compete with "daddy's money."
3. Her divorce will be due to horse time interfering with family time.

As a millennial, Rich family Horse Girls are a legend of their own on the Internet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DD is an equestrian. I'm about to spend $50,000 on a new horse that "might" last her 2 years before she's at the next level. Then there is the $6K saddles, etc. And, of course, the board and maintenance of said horse. It's ludicrous.

I didn't fully appreciate the cost when she started and had no idea she would ever be serious. We are lucky we can do that for her. She struggles in school, so it is her therapy (although pay for therapy, too).

I'll be honest. I kind of resent it, but lately, she has started to understand what it all costs and has been very grateful, so that helps.

So you are creating the undatable Horse Girl. Every college and college graduate knows to stay away from, and never date (seriously) since they are a little crazy, but man, they are great in .....

So I'm guessing you are a doctor / attorney / finance guy.

1. The boyfriend / husband will never be the priority.
2. The boyfriend / husband will never be able to compete with "daddy's money."
3. Her divorce will be due to horse time interfering with family time.

As a millennial, Rich family Horse Girls are a legend of their own on the Internet.

23 GUYS EXPLAIN WHY “HORSE GIRLS” ARE A HUGE RED FLAG
http://www.whiskeyriff.com/2018/01/02/23-guys-give-the-reason-horse-girls-are-a-huge-red-flag/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are times I think what the heck? And not just the money, there's also my time. Spending an entire weekend at the activity isn't my idea of fun. But then I keep on paying and keep on going to events b/c I'm happy that my kids each have a sport they're so passionate about. I never felt anything like that growing up or had a real passion. We're in the here and now, not thinking how it'll pay off in the future.

But that said, I'm 50 now and realized how I'm growing tired of it all. I am looking forward to the day it ends. I see how other (younger and/or SAHM) moms get excited to travel and make mini-vacations out of it, where I'm just get me home.

I hear you. Mine plays violin -- the instrument nd lessons can be very expensive (they are for us). And, the time! For years, I had to sit in on the lessons and take notes!! THen she wanted to try fencing and horseback riding. We can't do all of it, honey! I frankly think she'd be great at fencing, but oh well. She occasionally is able to do a session of horseback riding but that is a trek from near city line (& we can't afford Rock Creek or CHevy Chase). Oh, well. We do what we can. I think yours and mine seem to be at a level of their activities where they will at least contribute to the college application, and that is something. These activities also give them skills and perspective. It's costing us an arm and a leg, but they are learning a lot!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hear you. Mine plays violin -- the instrument nd lessons can be very expensive (they are for us). And, the time! For years, I had to sit in on the lessons and take notes!! THen she wanted to try fencing and horseback riding. We can't do all of it, honey! I frankly think she'd be great at fencing, but oh well. She occasionally is able to do a session of horseback riding but that is a trek from near city line (& we can't afford Rock Creek or CHevy Chase). Oh, well. We do what we can. I think yours and mine seem to be at a level of their activities where they will at least contribute to the college application, and that is something. These activities also give them skills and perspective. It's costing us an arm and a leg, but they are learning a lot!

My oldest DD also plays violin and she takes lessons twice a week for 90 minutes each at the cost of $100/hr. Her violin is a gift from my FIL and it costs $125K. My younger DD plays the piano and she takes lessons twice a week for 90 minutes each at the cost of $110/hr. Her Hamburg Steinway grand piano is a gift from my FIL and it costs $90K. My FIL pays for the lessons and travel expenses when they have to go compete nationally. We spent over $50k last year in lessons and travel competition. Definitely not cheap.

Will that make them to become Anne Akiko Meyers and Leng Leng? Probably not, but having nice musical instruments and excellent music teachers do help a lot. I am so grateful that my FIL has the money to help my kids follow their passions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are times I think what the heck? And not just the money, there's also my time. Spending an entire weekend at the activity isn't my idea of fun. But then I keep on paying and keep on going to events b/c I'm happy that my kids each have a sport they're so passionate about. I never felt anything like that growing up or had a real passion. We're in the here and now, not thinking how it'll pay off in the future.

But that said, I'm 50 now and realized how I'm growing tired of it all. I am looking forward to the day it ends. I see how other (younger and/or SAHM) moms get excited to travel and make mini-vacations out of it, where I'm just get me home.

I hear you. Mine plays violin -- the instrument nd lessons can be very expensive (they are for us). And, the time! For years, I had to sit in on the lessons and take notes!! THen she wanted to try fencing and horseback riding. We can't do all of it, honey! I frankly think she'd be great at fencing, but oh well. She occasionally is able to do a session of horseback riding but that is a trek from near city line (& we can't afford Rock Creek or CHevy Chase). Oh, well. We do what we can. I think yours and mine seem to be at a level of their activities where they will at least contribute to the college application, and that is something. These activities also give them skills and perspective. It's costing us an arm and a leg, but they are learning a lot!

Fencing at the basic level is cheap, and good for her body. I wouldn’t say no to a sport. I would say no to the riding lessons.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DD is an equestrian. I'm about to spend $50,000 on a new horse that "might" last her 2 years before she's at the next level. Then there is the $6K saddles, etc. And, of course, the board and maintenance of said horse. It's ludicrous.

I didn't fully appreciate the cost when she started and had no idea she would ever be serious. We are lucky we can do that for her. She struggles in school, so it is her therapy (although pay for therapy, too).

I'll be honest. I kind of resent it, but lately, she has started to understand what it all costs and has been very grateful, so that helps.

You don't need to spend that kind of money to ride and compete. I event with an OTTB and have used saddles, and I have tons of fun. It's your choice to spend crazy money on Big Eq or whatever she's doing.

I’m curious how you do it for less? My daughter is very low level (doesn’t own a horse) and all the shows in this area are several hundred a day even without bringing your own horses. Are you in this area? I would be interested in names of specific barns and shows. We go to one of the cheaper ones I thought and it’s still insane. Or is your point that you have more fun but maybe are less competitive?

Well, it is expensive, no matter what you do, but there are levels of expense.

Like I said, there are plenty of amateurs competing at pretty high levels in eventing on dirt cheap Off-The-Track Thoroughbreds (OTTBs). I'm in Virginia, and I go to the local horse trials in the Mid-Atlantic (Loch Moy, Waredaca, Lexington, etc. )

But if you are looking to do USEF rated shows, it's a lot more $$$. There's really no upper limit to what you can spend.

I’m the person who brought up riding. Yes, my DD does rates shows. You really have to have the “right” horse for those shows. She was in dressage and recently switched to show jumping, so we have to buy all new tack, etc.

The cheapest way to show for a middle/high school kid is on an IEA team. For the PP trying to find less expensiveoptions, IEA could be a good fit. And it’s fun because it’s a team. My DD did IEA this year and really liked it.

What IEA team was your daughter on? Mine is interested in joining one this coming year and there's also a thread about it on the Sports forum (FCPS equestrian teams).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's far better situation than having one playing video games and using e-cigs which will likely lead to heroin and a life living on the streets. So we see it as a positive way to keep him on the right track!

But can't this be done by participating in less expensive sports?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are times I think what the heck? And not just the money, there's also my time. Spending an entire weekend at the activity isn't my idea of fun. But then I keep on paying and keep on going to events b/c I'm happy that my kids each have a sport they're so passionate about. I never felt anything like that growing up or had a real passion. We're in the here and now, not thinking how it'll pay off in the future.

But that said, I'm 50 now and realized how I'm growing tired of it all. I am looking forward to the day it ends. I see how other (younger and/or SAHM) moms get excited to travel and make mini-vacations out of it, where I'm just get me home.

I hear you. Mine plays violin -- the instrument nd lessons can be very expensive (they are for us). And, the time! For years, I had to sit in on the lessons and take notes!! THen she wanted to try fencing and horseback riding. We can't do all of it, honey! I frankly think she'd be great at fencing, but oh well. She occasionally is able to do a session of horseback riding but that is a trek from near city line (& we can't afford Rock Creek or CHevy Chase). Oh, well. We do what we can. I think yours and mine seem to be at a level of their activities where they will at least contribute to the college application, and that is something. These activities also give them skills and perspective. It's costing us an arm and a leg, but they are learning a lot!

Fencing at the basic level is cheap, and good for her body. I wouldn’t say no to a sport. I would say no to the riding lessons.


I wouldn’t say cheap. One lesson a week was $120/month for my DS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hear you. Mine plays violin -- the instrument nd lessons can be very expensive (they are for us). And, the time! For years, I had to sit in on the lessons and take notes!! THen she wanted to try fencing and horseback riding. We can't do all of it, honey! I frankly think she'd be great at fencing, but oh well. She occasionally is able to do a session of horseback riding but that is a trek from near city line (& we can't afford Rock Creek or CHevy Chase). Oh, well. We do what we can. I think yours and mine seem to be at a level of their activities where they will at least contribute to the college application, and that is something. These activities also give them skills and perspective. It's costing us an arm and a leg, but they are learning a lot!

My oldest DD also plays violin and she takes lessons twice a week for 90 minutes each at the cost of $100/hr. Her violin is a gift from my FIL and it costs $125K. My younger DD plays the piano and she takes lessons twice a week for 90 minutes each at the cost of $110/hr. Her Hamburg Steinway grand piano is a gift from my FIL and it costs $90K. My FIL pays for the lessons and travel expenses when they have to go compete nationally. We spent over $50k last year in lessons and travel competition. Definitely not cheap.

Will that make them to become Anne Akiko Meyers and Leng Leng? Probably not, but having nice musical instruments and excellent music teachers do help a lot. I am so grateful that my FIL has the money to help my kids follow their passions.

And for some perspective from people of regular income - my 8th grade daughter plays violin everyday at middle school orchestra class. Her violin was about $300 used. Next year she'll play in high school and do pit for the theater program there. Very cheap and she gets to enjoy playing. She also took piano and played for about 3 years on our $100 Craigslist weighted keys electronic piano find. Lessons were group and cost about $110 per 8-week session. She also plays tennis with a used racket - not sure what the cost was - maybe $25. She played on her middle school tennis team and will play in high school. She learned with group lessons originally and did weekly semi-private lessons for two summers. I think they were $25 each so maybe $200 per summer. Sports and activities can be enjoyable without being expensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hear you. Mine plays violin -- the instrument nd lessons can be very expensive (they are for us). And, the time! For years, I had to sit in on the lessons and take notes!! THen she wanted to try fencing and horseback riding. We can't do all of it, honey! I frankly think she'd be great at fencing, but oh well. She occasionally is able to do a session of horseback riding but that is a trek from near city line (& we can't afford Rock Creek or CHevy Chase). Oh, well. We do what we can. I think yours and mine seem to be at a level of their activities where they will at least contribute to the college application, and that is something. These activities also give them skills and perspective. It's costing us an arm and a leg, but they are learning a lot!

My oldest DD also plays violin and she takes lessons twice a week for 90 minutes each at the cost of $100/hr. Her violin is a gift from my FIL and it costs $125K. My younger DD plays the piano and she takes lessons twice a week for 90 minutes each at the cost of $110/hr. Her Hamburg Steinway grand piano is a gift from my FIL and it costs $90K. My FIL pays for the lessons and travel expenses when they have to go compete nationally. We spent over $50k last year in lessons and travel competition. Definitely not cheap.

Will that make them to become Anne Akiko Meyers and Leng Leng? Probably not, but having nice musical instruments and excellent music teachers do help a lot. I am so grateful that my FIL has the money to help my kids follow their passions.

And for some perspective from people of regular income - my 8th grade daughter plays violin everyday at middle school orchestra class. Her violin was about $300 used. Next year she'll play in high school and do pit for the theater program there. Very cheap and she gets to enjoy playing. She also took piano and played for about 3 years on our $100 Craigslist weighted keys electronic piano find. Lessons were group and cost about $110 per 8-week session. She also plays tennis with a used racket - not sure what the cost was - maybe $25. She played on her middle school tennis team and will play in high school. She learned with group lessons originally and did weekly semi-private lessons for two summers. I think they were $25 each so maybe $200 per summer. Sports and activities can be enjoyable without being expensive.

I'm the OP. My other two children have more normal, average activities like school based, recreational leagues, parks and rec classes etc are are perfectly happy. Neither of them have near the drive and ambition about anything as my DD does about her sport. Of course there are ways to do sports and activities that don't cost a fortune, but not hers and not at the level at which she competes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DD is an equestrian. I'm about to spend $50,000 on a new horse that "might" last her 2 years before she's at the next level. Then there is the $6K saddles, etc. And, of course, the board and maintenance of said horse. It's ludicrous.

I didn't fully appreciate the cost when she started and had no idea she would ever be serious. We are lucky we can do that for her. She struggles in school, so it is her therapy (although pay for therapy, too).

I'll be honest. I kind of resent it, but lately, she has started to understand what it all costs and has been very grateful, so that helps.

So you are creating the undatable Horse Girl. Every college and college graduate knows to stay away from, and never date (seriously) since they are a little crazy, but man, they are great in .....

So I'm guessing you are a doctor / attorney / finance guy.

1. The boyfriend / husband will never be the priority.
2. The boyfriend / husband will never be able to compete with "daddy's money."
3. Her divorce will be due to horse time interfering with family time.

As a millennial, Rich family Horse Girls are a legend of their own on the Internet.

Oookaay! Except my horse girl daughter is a lesbian so how does that fit into your mysogynistic thoughts?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's far better situation than having one playing video games and using e-cigs which will likely lead to heroin and a life living on the streets. So we see it as a positive way to keep him on the right track!

But can't this be done by participating in less expensive sports?

DS participates in an inexpensive sport and he is really good at it. At the elite level all sports are expensive due to traveling for competitions and private coaching.

The only way to keep costs down is if your kid is not that good.