Families booking middle seats and then expecting others to switch with them

[Anonymous]

One reason I think OP was trolling is that I have seen this debate break out on other forums and it is pretty predictable in both outcome and flameworthiness (another reason of course being that no one knows how a family got split up).

There is a faction out there (I have no idea how big it is) that thinks that children should generally not fly, and if they do fly they should not impinge on anyone else (i.e., the airline splits you up, you should wait for the next flight).

Then there is a (larger?) group that thinks that they might deign to allow a 2 year to sit with a parent, but only if they have approved the purpose of travel (e.g., life threatening medical treatment) as well as the family's pre-trip planning efforts.

Finally, there is a group that says that 2 yr olds need special treatment (just like, say, handicapped passengers) and would always give up their seat to reunite a toddler and a parent.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I am not trolling and I'm pretty shocked that a few people think its actually OK to do this to others. I always thought that this only happened due to airlines re-assigning people. We recently had a flight canceled on us. We were offered another flight later that afternoon but there were only middle seats available so we reluctantly had to wait until the late night flight which was not pleasant with small kids but better than across the country in separate seats. When we were originally searching for tickets, we also were bummed that one of the best priced fares only had middle seats available so we didn't take it. I learned on this past trip that other people just do what is convenient for them and expect others to accomodate them. They take the earlier flight or book the cheap tickets and just expect others will give up their seats. There are several people on this thread that seem to be doing this with full entitlement too. This sucks for the people who do end up get separated for no fault of their own because fewer people will be willing to switch with them.

On our latest trip a man whose middle seat was next to my husband asked my husband (on the aisle) to switch with his teenage son who was two rows up and in a middle seat. His english wasn't very good and we assumed that it was a father and son traveling from abroad and may have been nervous in a strange country. Once my husband who was significantly taller than the adult man moved, his wife showed up and she had the window seat. I managed our two young kids alone, DH was crunched in a middle seat and this adult man enjoyed the aisle, his wife enjoyed the window and their son sat between them. In hindsight, we should have made them move back and they seemed so entitled that they should get comfortable seats together.

On the flight back it happened again. This time a woman asked my husband to switch his aisle seat with her 12 year old in a middle seat again only one row up from her and her middle seat. He said no (after getting burned the last time) and she seemed very annoyed. Her husband was one row back trying to switch people out of aisle and window seats so he could sit with their two other kids who were under five. One person gave up a seat but he was having trouble finding someone else to switch. I started to offer to have my husband sit with our kids and I would switch around but then the mother jumped in and wanted us to do that so she could sit with her 12 yr again and find someone else to switch for the smaller kids. We told her no to that again and sat down. The flight attendant finally came back and someone else did take a middle seat to let the dad sit with the little kids without the mother jumping in again. She then kept pushing the issue of switching around with people to be with her older son and the flight attendant had to tell her loudly that 12 was old enough to sit by himself and that she needed to sit down. This family ended up delaying the plane by 15-20 minutes. The pilot had to come on to the speakers and tell people that they needed to sit down in their assigned seats or the plane would be even more delayed. Finally someone gave up their aisle seat so the mother could sit next to her 12 year old son and the plane could take off. The flight staff seemed like they were going to throw her off the plane. We mentioned to the father who was behind us how shocked we were that airline would separate a family of five in all middle seats. He replied that they had booked/accepted the middle seats and didn't think it would be that hard to find 3-5 people to switch with them. Seriously??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, 15:04 is ridiculous. Why does having a child give you the right to trump everyone else? How is it common sense that you bringing a child with you makes you more important that someone else who paid more for their ticket than you did?

I wonder if guys would knock out children on their way to the life boat on a modern Titanic?

[Anonymous]

Middle seats cost the same as window or aisle seats. Why would a family purposely book middle seats? This accusation from some people do NOT make any sense. More than likely it is because the late booking.

If you don't want to switch seats, don't do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I am not trolling and I'm pretty shocked that a few people think its actually OK to do this to others. I always thought that this only happened due to airlines re-assigning people. We recently had a flight canceled on us. We were offered another flight later that afternoon but there were only middle seats available so we reluctantly had to wait until the late night flight which was not pleasant with small kids but better than across the country in separate seats. When we were originally searching for tickets, we also were bummed that one of the best priced fares only had middle seats available so we didn't take it. I learned on this past trip that other people just do what is convenient for them and expect others to accomodate them. They take the earlier flight or book the cheap tickets and just expect others will give up their seats. There are several people on this thread that seem to be doing this with full entitlement too. This sucks for the people who do end up get separated for no fault of their own because fewer people will be willing to switch with them.

On our latest trip a man whose middle seat was next to my husband asked my husband (on the aisle) to switch with his teenage son who was two rows up and in a middle seat. His english wasn't very good and we assumed that it was a father and son traveling from abroad and may have been nervous in a strange country. Once my husband who was significantly taller than the adult man moved, his wife showed up and she had the window seat. I managed our two young kids alone, DH was crunched in a middle seat and this adult man enjoyed the aisle, his wife enjoyed the window and their son sat between them. In hindsight, we should have made them move back and they seemed so entitled that they should get comfortable seats together.

On the flight back it happened again. This time a woman asked my husband to switch his aisle seat with her 12 year old in a middle seat again only one row up from her and her middle seat. He said no (after getting burned the last time) and she seemed very annoyed. Her husband was one row back trying to switch people out of aisle and window seats so he could sit with their two other kids who were under five. One person gave up a seat but he was having trouble finding someone else to switch. I started to offer to have my husband sit with our kids and I would switch around but then the mother jumped in and wanted us to do that so she could sit with her 12 yr again and find someone else to switch for the smaller kids. We told her no to that again and sat down. The flight attendant finally came back and someone else did take a middle seat to let the dad sit with the little kids without the mother jumping in again. She then kept pushing the issue of switching around with people to be with her older son and the flight attendant had to tell her loudly that 12 was old enough to sit by himself and that she needed to sit down. This family ended up delaying the plane by 15-20 minutes. The pilot had to come on to the speakers and tell people that they needed to sit down in their assigned seats or the plane would be even more delayed. Finally someone gave up their aisle seat so the mother could sit next to her 12 year old son and the plane could take off. The flight staff seemed like they were going to throw her off the plane. We mentioned to the father who was behind us how shocked we were that airline would separate a family of five in all middle seats. He replied that they had booked/accepted the middle seats and didn't think it would be that hard to find 3-5 people to switch with them. Seriously??

Yes, seriously. Although my goodness you're assigning a lot of fantastical malice. They found an available flight that had only middle seats available, they didn't go trolling through the Internets looking for cheap flights with middle seats.

Families want to sit together. This is normal. I'm surprised you have trouble grasping that concept. When young children are involved, families may feel even more strongly.

The frustration and annoyance your husband detected was probably mostly aimed at the airline, not your husband. Although, frankly, your husband sounds like a dick, so maybe I'm wrong.

You quite seriously sound like the woman who was speeding down the street outside my daughter's school in her 8 year old Mercedes and collided with the back of a school bus. She then proceeded to inform the police that it was the fault of the bus driver because the bus was in her way.

I'm just curious: Have you ever done anything nice for someone without feeling resentful about it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I am not trolling and I'm pretty shocked that a few people think its actually OK to do this to others. I always thought that this only happened due to airlines re-assigning people. We recently had a flight canceled on us. We were offered another flight later that afternoon but there were only middle seats available so we reluctantly had to wait until the late night flight which was not pleasant with small kids but better than across the country in separate seats. When we were originally searching for tickets, we also were bummed that one of the best priced fares only had middle seats available so we didn't take it. I learned on this past trip that other people just do what is convenient for them and expect others to accomodate them. They take the earlier flight or book the cheap tickets and just expect others will give up their seats. There are several people on this thread that seem to be doing this with full entitlement too. This sucks for the people who do end up get separated for no fault of their own because fewer people will be willing to switch with them.

On our latest trip a man whose middle seat was next to my husband asked my husband (on the aisle) to switch with his teenage son who was two rows up and in a middle seat. His english wasn't very good and we assumed that it was a father and son traveling from abroad and may have been nervous in a strange country. Once my husband who was significantly taller than the adult man moved, his wife showed up and she had the window seat. I managed our two young kids alone, DH was crunched in a middle seat and this adult man enjoyed the aisle, his wife enjoyed the window and their son sat between them. In hindsight, we should have made them move back and they seemed so entitled that they should get comfortable seats together.

On the flight back it happened again. This time a woman asked my husband to switch his aisle seat with her 12 year old in a middle seat again only one row up from her and her middle seat. He said no (after getting burned the last time) and she seemed very annoyed. Her husband was one row back trying to switch people out of aisle and window seats so he could sit with their two other kids who were under five. One person gave up a seat but he was having trouble finding someone else to switch. I started to offer to have my husband sit with our kids and I would switch around but then the mother jumped in and wanted us to do that so she could sit with her 12 yr again and find someone else to switch for the smaller kids. We told her no to that again and sat down. The flight attendant finally came back and someone else did take a middle seat to let the dad sit with the little kids without the mother jumping in again. She then kept pushing the issue of switching around with people to be with her older son and the flight attendant had to tell her loudly that 12 was old enough to sit by himself and that she needed to sit down. This family ended up delaying the plane by 15-20 minutes. The pilot had to come on to the speakers and tell people that they needed to sit down in their assigned seats or the plane would be even more delayed. Finally someone gave up their aisle seat so the mother could sit next to her 12 year old son and the plane could take off. The flight staff seemed like they were going to throw her off the plane. We mentioned to the father who was behind us how shocked we were that airline would separate a family of five in all middle seats. He replied that they had booked/accepted the middle seats and didn't think it would be that hard to find 3-5 people to switch with them. Seriously??

OP, so true. I'm with you 100%. We travel tons and I spend a great deal of time and money to seat our family together, almost always on nonstop flights. Yes, it takes time and costs more.

[Anonymous]

In my experience the airlines almost always show more seats "blocked" on the reservation screen than are actually blocked. I think the problem has gotten worse since they started selling aisle/window seat assignments (they make you think there are only a few aisle seats left so you will buy one).

See this article--
http://travel.usatoday.com/experts/mcgee/story/2012-04-25/Are-airlines-withholding-seats-Readers-say-yes/54507460/1

Again, I think the anger should be directed at the airlines, not at families trying to do their best.

If you don't want to switch seats for a 12 yr old or teen, I am not going to criticize you, but I don't think very small children should be expected to fly by themselves, even if it means slightly inconveniencing me (or you).

[Anonymous]

I would honestly be annoyed if asked to switch seats for a family, especially if I had paid extra for leg room or if I had my favorite aisle seat, but I would do it b/c 1) I wouldn't want to split up a family and 2) I sure as heck don't want to sit next to your young kids (I have my own young kids I get enough of at home).

Airlines totally split up people traveling together. It never crossed my mind that a family would intentionally game the system, but again, I'd rather you sit with your own kids. But please be mindful of people who may refuse but aren't being jerks about it. My sister has a severe phobia of flying and for some reason needs to sit at the window. She takes prescription medication to help with the flying anxiety but still needs to be near a window. She's very nice and would probably move if you asked her, but she would be in her own personal hell.

If you ask people to move and they do it, be gracious and send them a drink or buy them a meal on the flight to show your gratitude.

[Anonymous]

It is amazing how much people do not know about ticket pricing. If you booked last minute, you are probably paying top dollar for those middle seats.

We always book fairly in advance and get seats together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I am not trolling and I'm pretty shocked that a few people think its actually OK to do this to others. I always thought that this only happened due to airlines re-assigning people. We recently had a flight canceled on us. We were offered another flight later that afternoon but there were only middle seats available so we reluctantly had to wait until the late night flight which was not pleasant with small kids but better than across the country in separate seats. When we were originally searching for tickets, we also were bummed that one of the best priced fares only had middle seats available so we didn't take it. I learned on this past trip that other people just do what is convenient for them and expect others to accomodate them. They take the earlier flight or book the cheap tickets and just expect others will give up their seats. There are several people on this thread that seem to be doing this with full entitlement too. This sucks for the people who do end up get separated for no fault of their own because fewer people will be willing to switch with them.

On our latest trip a man whose middle seat was next to my husband asked my husband (on the aisle) to switch with his teenage son who was two rows up and in a middle seat. His english wasn't very good and we assumed that it was a father and son traveling from abroad and may have been nervous in a strange country. Once my husband who was significantly taller than the adult man moved, his wife showed up and she had the window seat. I managed our two young kids alone, DH was crunched in a middle seat and this adult man enjoyed the aisle, his wife enjoyed the window and their son sat between them. In hindsight, we should have made them move back and they seemed so entitled that they should get comfortable seats together.

On the flight back it happened again. This time a woman asked my husband to switch his aisle seat with her 12 year old in a middle seat again only one row up from her and her middle seat. He said no (after getting burned the last time) and she seemed very annoyed. Her husband was one row back trying to switch people out of aisle and window seats so he could sit with their two other kids who were under five. One person gave up a seat but he was having trouble finding someone else to switch. I started to offer to have my husband sit with our kids and I would switch around but then the mother jumped in and wanted us to do that so she could sit with her 12 yr again and find someone else to switch for the smaller kids. We told her no to that again and sat down. The flight attendant finally came back and someone else did take a middle seat to let the dad sit with the little kids without the mother jumping in again. She then kept pushing the issue of switching around with people to be with her older son and the flight attendant had to tell her loudly that 12 was old enough to sit by himself and that she needed to sit down. This family ended up delaying the plane by 15-20 minutes. The pilot had to come on to the speakers and tell people that they needed to sit down in their assigned seats or the plane would be even more delayed. Finally someone gave up their aisle seat so the mother could sit next to her 12 year old son and the plane could take off. The flight staff seemed like they were going to throw her off the plane. We mentioned to the father who was behind us how shocked we were that airline would separate a family of five in all middle seats. He replied that they had booked/accepted the middle seats and didn't think it would be that hard to find 3-5 people to switch with them. Seriously??

OP, so true. I'm with you 100%. We travel tons and I spend a great deal of time and money to seat our family together, almost always on nonstop flights. Yes, it takes time and costs more.

That mom sounds totally obnoxious. That is ridiculous and an extreme situation.

I don't think most families try to game the system. I have 2 kids under 3. People are usually more accomodating to us.

[Anonymous]

7:26 is why people don't want to give up their seats. You really think its OK for a family of five who went on a plane knowing they had all middle seats to try to break up the family with younger kids so the mom could sit with a 12 year old? Why does the family who accepted the middle seats deserve to be together when the family that made the effort to pick seats together does not? You think it was OK for an adult man to expect a parent to move away from his younger children so he could have a better seat with his entire family at the expense of the other family?

You sound like the one who never does anything for nice for anyone but expects everyone else to do things for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone, you know this OP. This is the person who doesn't give up his seat on the Metro for the elderly, pregnant, or moms of very young children because *he got there first.*

Not the OP here.

This is a completely inapt comparison. Metro doesn't offer reserved seats you can select at the time you buy your ticket.

If you want to use an example, at least find one that's credible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:7:26 is why people don't want to give up their seats. You really think its OK for a family of five who went on a plane knowing they had all middle seats to try to break up the family with younger kids so the mom could sit with a 12 year old? Why does the family who accepted the middle seats deserve to be together when the family that made the effort to pick seats together does not? You think it was OK for an adult man to expect a parent to move away from his younger children so he could have a better seat with his entire family at the expense of the other family?

You sound like the one who never does anything for nice for anyone but expects everyone else to do things for you.

Didn't you say you were done with this thread?

You started off talking about business travelers and now you're talking about families displacing other families. What the fuck?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone, you know this OP. This is the person who doesn't give up his seat on the Metro for the elderly, pregnant, or moms of very young children because *he got there first.*

Not the OP here.

This is a completely inapt comparison. Metro doesn't offer reserved seats you can select at the time you buy your ticket.

If you want to use an example, at least find one that's credible.

The airlines don't really do this either. Very recently they've started charging more for "economy plus" or whatnot, but your random seat in the back? No.

[Anonymous]

Why does the family who accepted the middle seats deserve to be together when the family that made the effort to pick seats together does not? You think it was OK for an adult man to expect a parent to move away from his younger children so he could have a better seat with his entire family at the expense of the other family?

Then just say no to the request, or advise the dad to ask someone who is not traveling with young kids of their own. It's not rocket science.