Does everyone else's teens do their own laundry?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I probably did 90% of their laundry (as well as DH’s) when they were in high school, but they certainly knew how, did it sometimes, and had no difficulty adding that to the list of things they needed to do to take care of themselves when they went to college. For it is just an efficiency thing, I work at home a few days a week and much easier for me to just collect everybody’s and do it at once rather than have four different people busy trying to use the washer.

Yeah same for me except my kids aren't in college yet. I just prefer to do it most of the time. But they know how and will occasionally run their own.

[Anonymous]

My kids have been doing their own laundry since they were like 10/11.

My mom did my laundry growing up but I felt she suffered from martyr syndrome and it had marked effects on her health - and I am not interested in following the same model.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not about learning. It's about taking-on tasks that don't need to be done by others. It's entitlement. Mom, your time is valuable too. I know they are busy. They're busy w/school work and practices, and them being successful, doing the best they can in school, is important to you. But still.

It doesn't always look perfect, the teens doing laundry. Too often they fish-out what they want to wear, wash that, adding other things. Not completing the task of doing all their laundry.

I keep a close eye on sports uniforms, anything smelly, that they wash those things immediately

Its not entitlement. Kids can help out in other ways. I'd rather do it more often than have the clothing sit. We all help each other out as that's what families do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's important for teens to do their own laundry. I do think it's important that teens contribute to the household in a real way. If it makes more sense for your household for you to do all the laundry (particularly if weekends are busy and you work from home, that makes sense, or if it's just a chore you don't mind) then great. Maybe instead your teen is cooking dinner twice a week or is in charge of the dishes, or does two walks a day with the dog, or vacuums weekly, or something.

You do need to make sure they know how to do the laundry before they're 18, but if their chores are something else, that's fine.

I think the real problem is teens that are not expected to contribute to the household in any real way. That's bad.

Agree. "They have lots of activities" is not a reason for my own kids to be excused.

Just because they don't fully do their laundry doesn't mean they don't contribute. When do your kids have time between activities or school. I'd rather do the laundry vs. shovel. My teen not only shovled us out but multiple neighbors (and didn't get paid). Mine can do laundry and do when they need to but its easier to do it all together.

[Anonymous]

Mine have done their own for a long time, they're 16 and 15. I WAH so will help with it if asked or if the machine stops when they're out but I don't do any folding or putting it away.

I also haven't packed their soccer or ski bags in forever and if we're going on a trip they pack themselves.

[Anonymous]

I am surprised at all the moms doing laundry for their kids. And you work full time?!! No wonder y’all are complaining 24/7.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I probably did 90% of their laundry (as well as DH’s) when they were in high school, but they certainly knew how, did it sometimes, and had no difficulty adding that to the list of things they needed to do to take care of themselves when they went to college. For it is just an efficiency thing, I work at home a few days a week and much easier for me to just collect everybody’s and do it at once rather than have four different people busy trying to use the washer.

Yeah same for me except my kids aren't in college yet. I just prefer to do it most of the time. But they know how and will occasionally run their own.

I prefer to do it because I just get it done quickly and neatly, without any nagging or arguing; however, I am trying to help them do it themselves as much as possible. They need to learn how to take care of themselves well before they leave for college. It's a necessary part of growing up. Same thing with dishes. They have to take turns doing it, even if it takes 3x as long as if I did it myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I never did my laundry, or much of any chore, until I moved out of my parents' house. Same for my husband. My kids did a lot more vacuuming and dusting of our house than my husband and I when we were kids, because it's a chore I personally detest, ha.

We all did very well when we moved out. It's not hard to do laundry, or any other chore!

I've spent 15+ years on DCUM and it's always very amusing to see parents try to one-up each other on that topic and claim that it prepares kids to be independent or something. The 3-4 year olds unloading the dishwasher is a particularly ridiculous example I've seen multiple times over the years. There's no learning curve to speak of. I showed my oldest how to work the washer and dryer a week before he went to college, and he never had any trouble. He did practically zero cooking at home, and uses his shared apartment kitchen more than any of his roommates, just by watching YouTube videos for his favorite meals. He keeps an eye on the cleaning schedule of the shared bathroom, and is the only one who brought a vacuum, apparently, and uses it.

I like to run a tight ship at home, and it's easier in terms of household water use and planning if I do the laundry for everyone. We also eat as a family as much as can, and most of the time we parents do the cooking. Kids take leftovers to school.

If your kids want to participate, great. If they're super busy and it stresses them out, there's no reason to force them. They're going to learn rapidly as soon as they need to.

I agree with this. My mother said to me as a teenager, you're going to spend the rest of your life doing housework don't worry about it now. I have thought about that often. She sure knew what she was talking about.

My own kids do stuff. Pet care and dishes mostly and taking out trash regularly. And responsibility for keeping their room clean and picking up after themselves in the house in general. I like a neat house and I don't do it for them. My focus is more on being a clean and considerate living partner rather than do all the chores.

However, this idea that they need to do all these things their entire childhoods to have "skills"...just kind of silly.

[Anonymous]

OMG what great kids you all have. I used to do the laundry for the whole family. (I work from home so it was pretty easy). But my teenager kept taking all of his clean clothes and dumping them on his floor amidst his dirty clothes (or just dumping them in his dirty clothes) because he was too lazy to put them in his closet. So that was the end of doing his laundry for him.

[Anonymous]

My teenager has been doing her own laundry since 10, because she wants to. I do a load of my younger two's laundry once a week and they separate and put away their stuff. All three of them know how, and if they need something washed when I'm not doing a load, they will do their own.

It's an easy chore to pass on to the kids, but there is no inherent value in having them do that over other stuff. We have house cleaners, so the kids only have to tidy the house and vacuum the kitchen area.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised at all the moms doing laundry for their kids. And you work full time?!! No wonder y’all are complaining 24/7.

Laundry is not a burden for me. I mostly work from home and run it during the day. I actually enjoy folding laundry, I love sitting down with a pile and watching something on tv and getting it folded in the evenings. Its been this way since before kids. I will miss having laundry to do when they leave.

The weeks I travel my kids and husband throw in their own loads. But if Im around its gladly my chore.

[Anonymous]

Kids are 18 and 15 a doing their own laundry since 13 and 10. I do have to remind them things about sorting colors, water temperature, wash settings etc. and they are receptive because they want their clothes to look nice and last longer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OMG what great kids you all have. I used to do the laundry for the whole family. (I work from home so it was pretty easy). But my teenager kept taking all of his clean clothes and dumping them on his floor amidst his dirty clothes (or just dumping them in his dirty clothes) because he was too lazy to put them in his closet. So that was the end of doing his laundry for him.

Haha, thanks but my kids are not really that great about household chores. They do their laundry because I told them several years ago that is the only way they can make sure they have clean clothes, otherwise I might not get to it. I also telework, but work is busy and I have a lot of other chores.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised at all the moms doing laundry for their kids. And you work full time?!! No wonder y’all are complaining 24/7.

I know, right. See the different threads on women’s labor in the home and feeling overwhelmed. Maybe it would help to drop a couple of things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. Started around maybe 12 or 13? I think it's a very important skill.

Can you list the skills that require more than 1 run through?

huh?