If you had to do it all over again, what would you do different?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Social connections made in college are very important and possibly life changing, but no more real than the social connections that can be made in grade school, or preschool, or high school, or soccer.

in the end, I think the neighborhood we bought in and the high school we choose were more consequential than their expensive colleges (which are both T10). I'd tell my own kids to stretch when buying the house where they raise their kids. Neighborhood matters (for parent relationships too).

Private high school matters too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
ED is the way to go, IMO. My biggest regret is making our youngest daughter apply to many national and local scholarships. The national ones were too hard with her stats to ever get, and the local ones are won by the same three kids from her class. Complete waste of time for her.

The only scholarships she was successful in receiving were the ones from colleges like Syracuse and Kenyon, but unfortunately, even with $30K off they are still $60k.

+1

Scholarship apps were a complete waste of time. DC would have been better off spending that time working, or anything else. Kid #2 will not be applying to any random scholarships.

Phew! Thanks for sharing this. We're donut hole and have just started encouraging D to search for apply to scholarships. They're a lot of work and I can already sense that most are a very long shot. Maybe I'll let her off the hook and encourage her to take on more work shifts instead. She will be thrilled : ).

+2

DH insisted DC1 “apply” for the random scholarships. She tried to tell him most were of the “need” variety. She did get some nice local ones (with one page apps requiring, at best, a “paragraph”) but they were based off her hard work within those communities (and they already knew her and her accomplishments).

DC2 took those extra shifts instead and worked hard-enough to get a four-figure bonus (who knew a fast-food franchisee would do that, esp for a PT employee!?!). Kept up the great grades…and got way more merit money than a scholarship here-or-there would’ve produced.

Our collective regret is applying to too many with no real intent to attend and not being open-minded enough about smaller or more local alternatives.

In the end, both kids embraced the motto to love the school that loves you….and, so far, so good!

Deeper breaths for the parents is also advised. This, too, shall pass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Social connections made in college are very important and possibly life changing, but no more real than the social connections that can be made in grade school, or preschool, or high school, or soccer.

in the end, I think the neighborhood we bought in and the high school we choose were more consequential than their expensive colleges (which are both T10). I'd tell my own kids to stretch when buying the house where they raise their kids. Neighborhood matters (for parent relationships too).

Private high school matters too.

yeah, that's what I mean by "neighborhood .. and the high school we choose". we went private. for us, those two decisions were more important than college destination, although that's probably third.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Funny so many people are saying they would do ED1/ED2. I wish my kid hadn't locked himself into a sub-Ivy ED. I feel like he would have had better choices if he'd held out.

There can definitely be regrets this way. Our friend’s kid ED’d to Princeton, RD’d to UVA. Waitlisted at both and is going to PSU. She would have almost certainly gotten into UVA ED they very much regret wasting ED on Princeton.

Why didn't they EA to UVA?

Right? The PP makes no sense. The kid probably wasn’t truly Princeton level and the parents were delusional and thought because they have As and a 1550 they should apply. Any kid that is actually competitive for Princeton would 99.9% get into UVA in EA. My kid just got into UVA in EA with high stats and would not be competitive for Princeton based on their very typical ECs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Funny so many people are saying they would do ED1/ED2. I wish my kid hadn't locked himself into a sub-Ivy ED. I feel like he would have had better choices if he'd held out.

The only people with better choices in RD had (1) niche majors/academic interests; (2) very tippy top of class; (3) national level individual awards or (4) filled a clear void at the university (nationally ranked harpist).

My DC attends a feeder school. About 20% of the class gets into an Ivy. But you have no info about where your child stands vs the rest of the class, and especially since all GPAs are unweighted, Naviance looked like a giant ink blot. My best guess was that DC was at the bottom of the top quartile grades wise, meaning Ivy was within range, but not guaranteed. In retrospect, though, the kids who get screwed in RD were mostly trying for engineering or Comp Sci (don't apply for CS. Just don't). I think being a humanities boy might have gotten him in. Or not. We'll never know. But if we were doing over, I think I'd pass on ED.

Why do you say don’t apply CS?

[Anonymous]

I would have tiger mom’d my kids sat. I would have dug in and figured out what specific sections and skills were tripping her up and gotten her help or taught her myself.

She’s excellent everywhere else and did it on her own…well we paid for everything a drove her, but didn’t micromanage her high school years. She a great person and applicant, but her relatively low (compared to the rest of her resume) is likely going to hold her back from going to the school she really wants to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Funny so many people are saying they would do ED1/ED2. I wish my kid hadn't locked himself into a sub-Ivy ED. I feel like he would have had better choices if he'd held out.

The only people with better choices in RD had (1) niche majors/academic interests; (2) very tippy top of class; (3) national level individual awards or (4) filled a clear void at the university (nationally ranked harpist).

My DC attends a feeder school. About 20% of the class gets into an Ivy. But you have no info about where your child stands vs the rest of the class, and especially since all GPAs are unweighted, Naviance looked like a giant ink blot. My best guess was that DC was at the bottom of the top quartile grades wise, meaning Ivy was within range, but not guaranteed. In retrospect, though, the kids who get screwed in RD were mostly trying for engineering or Comp Sci (don't apply for CS. Just don't). I think being a humanities boy might have gotten him in. Or not. We'll never know. But if we were doing over, I think I'd pass on ED.

Why do you say don’t apply CS?

Bc it’s the absolute hardest major/standards for admissions. Same with Engineering

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Funny so many people are saying they would do ED1/ED2. I wish my kid hadn't locked himself into a sub-Ivy ED. I feel like he would have had better choices if he'd held out.

The only people with better choices in RD had (1) niche majors/academic interests; (2) very tippy top of class; (3) national level individual awards or (4) filled a clear void at the university (nationally ranked harpist).

My DC attends a feeder school. About 20% of the class gets into an Ivy. But you have no info about where your child stands vs the rest of the class, and especially since all GPAs are unweighted, Naviance looked like a giant ink blot. My best guess was that DC was at the bottom of the top quartile grades wise, meaning Ivy was within range, but not guaranteed. In retrospect, though, the kids who get screwed in RD were mostly trying for engineering or Comp Sci (don't apply for CS. Just don't). I think being a humanities boy might have gotten him in. Or not. We'll never know. But if we were doing over, I think I'd pass on ED.

Why do you say don’t apply CS?

Bc those slots are filled early. So in RD those kids are screwed bc no one needs that profile to shape their class.

[Anonymous]

If you research that a private school with 2000 per class, only had 3 seniors graduating with a certain liberal arts major (and 7 minors) would that be considered an undersubscribed major?

[Anonymous]

If possible, visit all the finalists spring of senior year even if your DC has visited in the past. Memories are fuzzy, it can be difficult to accurately compare options.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If possible, visit all the finalists spring of senior year even if your DC has visited in the past. Memories are fuzzy, it can be difficult to accurately compare options.

I want to do this, but they all involve flights and hotels and it’s expensive (rates are jacked up over admitted student days). School needs to be missed also. We are picking one place to visit. I wish we could do more.

[Anonymous]

We should have checked out a wider array of schools. After kids were through college I was leisurely driving west & had the time to look at places like U of Kansas, Ok State, Oklahoma, & Texas Tech. None of these were on kids’ radars when they applied to colleges, but all have beautiful campuses & are in fun towns.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you research that a private school with 2000 per class, only had 3 seniors graduating with a certain liberal arts major (and 7 minors) would that be considered an undersubscribed major?

But there’s also the danger that major/department will be eliminated!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you research that a private school with 2000 per class, only had 3 seniors graduating with a certain liberal arts major (and 7 minors) would that be considered an undersubscribed major?

But there’s also the danger that major/department will be eliminated!

Yes but there are always lots of other things to major in. What kid only has one interest?

At a private university/college with few major, these applicants are not admitted to any major. Instead, the application is read and evaluated with that major in mind.

[Anonymous]

Redshirt my son in Kindergarten and have him go through school a year older!