So many kids at top private schools have private college counsellors?

[Anonymous]

My kids attended top 3 private schools. We avoided the school counselor as much as possible, had no private counselor either. Kids all attended top schools and actually were complimented on their out of the box applications. Parents didn’t attend college in US.
My theory is that a counselor will never spend as much time and won’t know your kid as well as a parent or the student themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids attended top 3 private schools. We avoided the school counselor as much as possible, had no private counselor either. Kids all attended top schools and actually were complimented on their out of the box applications. Parents didn’t attend college in US.
My theory is that a counselor will never spend as much time and won’t know your kid as well as a parent or the student themselves.

Did you help? What resources did you use given your unfamiliarity with the US system?
I agree that parents are the best help - and can help kids dig into their character, values, brainstorm in ways that an outside counselor won't have the time to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At our top public most of the kids have private college counselors. It's a thing, unfortunately.

Why "unfortunately"? How does this affect you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At our top public most of the kids have private college counselors. It's a thing, unfortunately.

Why "unfortunately"? How does this affect you?

DP: I think the ubiquity of private counselors increasing the gaming and the anxiety, neither of which are pleasant for teens.

I don't blame families for hiring private counselors and if I had unlimited funds I might have done so myself, but it's a case of individual decisions with minimal consequences aggregating into a negative environment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Is there a way to workaround how the private schools that prioritize families with hooks (recruited athletes, legacies, etc).

or are the rest of us just have to deal with what's left after those hooked families?

At your school, is there a pattern for how they assign a more junior member of the college counseling team vs. the CC director to different kids? Does the assignment tend to be random/ by class schedule or intentionally to match the students' gender/ability/area of interest?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids attended top 3 private schools. We avoided the school counselor as much as possible, had no private counselor either. Kids all attended top schools and actually were complimented on their out of the box applications. Parents didn’t attend college in US.
My theory is that a counselor will never spend as much time and won’t know your kid as well as a parent or the student themselves.

Did you help? What resources did you use given your unfamiliarity with the US system?
I agree that parents are the best help - and can help kids dig into their character, values, brainstorm in ways that an outside counselor won't have the time to.

Yes, I helped. I did research - it’s not brain surgery- but also think that our relative naivety made their application less canned and more authentic. I encouraged them to write about what they know, be self deprecating and a bit different.

But then I also know that I can do a better job than any travel agent or wedding planner…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:CA parent here, DC in private school. No parent I know is using an independent counselor. And no one is hiding it, namely because their kids couldn’t keep that quiet 😂

We don’t need someone else in the mix. Both of us parents are college grads who are more than knowledgeable in the process.

If you need a private counselor and have the $$ go for it but didn’t feel it was for us.

same. VA parent, private school. no top kids use them. above average ones do, typically when the private school tells the parent at the end of sophomore meeting that their kid is not on track to be able to get in to UVA based on grades or rigor or both.
there is a bit of funneling to push the best/brightest to the best path and encourage the average or above ones to not overload, no need for all AP/honors. Yet the top kids are told to take the hardest. Having a kid a little above average for the school, 1350, mostly honors, 7 APs total, finished with calc AB (middle math path of 5) then seeing how differently the top kids were cultivated and encouraged was surprising. had no clue there were kids taking very difficult APs in 10th grade who ended up with 7APs by the end of junior year, 12 total, until we had one get invited in 9th to be on an intense stem track leading to multivariable in 12th with 15 other kids. These same kids were almost always award winners, gov school nominees, Morehead/Belk/etc nominees. You think a 3.9 uw with 7APs must be great until you see there is a group taking almost an entirely different curriculum

A lot of people think their kids are smartest and doing the best until they see the competition.