Does your riding 6th grader in public school have a phone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m one of the mooching parents, but I’m not judgemental. My kid doesn’t have a phone because he has zero self control around screens. I wish I could get him one but he’s such a disaster with the screens he has. Hes also really really good at tech stuff so he hacks his way around any restrictions. It’s killing me. But thank you to parents whose kids let him borrow phone to tell me where he is going!
(I’m thinking about just putting an air tag in his backpack.)

I respect this post the most. As a parent who knows your child and you can legitimately explain why (vs shouting about the arbitrary age of 6th vs 7th for a phone). The funny thing is, our child's best friend (who doesn't have a phone) plays on my kids phone every time they get together. Like an addict jonesing for the internet.

[Anonymous]

No phone for our rising 6th grader. We haven’t needed one. Plus, we are delaying it as long as possible. Thinking about all of the parental controls that will be required when the time comes makes me break out in hives. Will probably do a dumb phone first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, started taking mass transit to school 40 minutes away by herself at the end of 4th grade. Got one then.

Yes, because no child before 1995 has ever used mass transit. Just say you gave in like the other parents. Please don't rationalize.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, started taking mass transit to school 40 minutes away by herself at the end of 4th grade. Got one then.

Yes, because no child before 1995 has ever used mass transit. Just say you gave in like the other parents. Please don't rationalize.

So I was the eye rolling parent to this argument when my kid was in 5th grade. The issue is there are no pay phones anywhere anymore. I rode the public bus as a kid and also always had change and would call my parents as needed with updates on what bus I was catching. They can't do that anymore. If you are ok with not having any clue when a 6th grader might arrive home or where they are, more power to you. Stick with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, started taking mass transit to school 40 minutes away by herself at the end of 4th grade. Got one then.

Yes, because no child before 1995 has ever used mass transit. Just say you gave in like the other parents. Please don't rationalize.

So I was the eye rolling parent to this argument when my kid was in 5th grade. The issue is there are no pay phones anywhere anymore. I rode the public bus as a kid and also always had change and would call my parents as needed with updates on what bus I was catching. They can't do that anymore. If you are ok with not having any clue when a 6th grader might arrive home or where they are, more power to you. Stick with it.

Yep. Rock on with your bad parenting self and let your 11 year old lose in the city with no phone. I mean this genuinely---I was too squeamish for this. I caved and bought my 6th grader a phone when she started taking the city bus and/or walking a mile+ by herself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, started taking mass transit to school 40 minutes away by herself at the end of 4th grade. Got one then.

Yes, because no child before 1995 has ever used mass transit. Just say you gave in like the other parents. Please don't rationalize.

So I was the eye rolling parent to this argument when my kid was in 5th grade. The issue is there are no pay phones anywhere anymore. I rode the public bus as a kid and also always had change and would call my parents as needed with updates on what bus I was catching. They can't do that anymore. If you are ok with not having any clue when a 6th grader might arrive home or where they are, more power to you. Stick with it.

Yep. Rock on with your bad parenting self and let your 11 year old loose in the city with no phone. I mean this genuinely---I was too squeamish for this. I caved and bought my 6th grader a phone when she started taking the city bus and/or walking a mile+ by herself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, started taking mass transit to school 40 minutes away by herself at the end of 4th grade. Got one then.

Yes, because no child before 1995 has ever used mass transit. Just say you gave in like the other parents. Please don't rationalize.

It's not like I gave her an iPhone. She had a super cheap phone that only allowed her to call three people - me, my best friend (who is her emergency contact) and grandma - plus 911. Also, in 1995, you could give your kid a quarter to carry around and they could use a pay phone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, started taking mass transit to school 40 minutes away by herself at the end of 4th grade. Got one then.

Yes, because no child before 1995 has ever used mass transit. Just say you gave in like the other parents. Please don't rationalize.

This is stupid because if phones had been as ubiquitous and inexpensive in 1995 and used prolifically like they are today our parents would definitely have gotten them for us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, started taking mass transit to school 40 minutes away by herself at the end of 4th grade. Got one then.

Yes, because no child before 1995 has ever used mass transit. Just say you gave in like the other parents. Please don't rationalize.

Babies also slept on their stomachs and we didn't have strict car seat rules.

I assume you also don't have a job like women from the 50s and plan to die early like women from the 1800s.

What happened 25 years ago - is not relevant today

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, she doesn’t. It’s bad for their brains, truly. We will wait till 8th grade or beyond.

Social media and game apps are bad for their brains. A telephone is not. The problem isn't the phone/text, it's that parents turn over the entire internet when they hand their child an iPhone or iPad.

NP. But I also agree it is bad for their brain. Internet on the phone or not. When kids get a phone they immediately default calling mom/dad/someone for everything. It hinders their development of problem solving skills and self confidence in their own abilities. DCUM loves to talk about executive function. Want to develop it in your child? Don’t hand them a cellphone. Let their brain work and think and make decisions. There is always a way to get a hold of a parent if they really need to, so I don’t buy the emergency scenario as a reason to give an 11 yr old a cell phone

?? Maybe your kid calls for everything, but mine doesn’t. He uses the internet and apps to make his own decisions.

[Anonymous]

FCPS rising 6th grader. No phone. Has an Apple Watch for the last year he can call us with instead. No regrets going this route and will put off a phone as long as possible. Any earlier than middle school is out of the question for us. I would say about half the kids in his class have one.

[Anonymous]

No. He’s salty about it though! We are trying to hold out one more year. (He has a Gizmodo watch so can make calls in emergencies.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If not, when will they get one? My 6th grader says everyone has one, and he wants to be able to communicate with all of these new friends who supposedly have phones.

Very limited til HS. Rising 10th grader just got a SIM card for the first time this summer.

[Anonymous]

Sort of. We are buying another cell as a "house" phone, no bells, no whistles, no apps: literally only calls, text & Facetime. My son can use it, but not take it to school. He can give the # out to his friends.

I liken it to when my parents bought a third car when I was in HS--it wasn't my car, but it was available to me to use. Same with this phone.

When he starts MS, it will become his, provided he has used it responsibly this year. I am really hoping that Away for the Day in FCPS works--it will be less hassle for him to take it to school but not use it during school hours if that policy is enforced. Glad to know that we'll have a year to find out if it actually works.

[Anonymous]

Yes, but a basic flip phone. Not a smart phone. He can text, but the old school text where you have to tap a number 1-3 times to get a letter, so it's kind of a pain and he doesn't text a lot. No internet or apps.

Got it because he developed a habit of getting off the school bus 1-3 stops before or after his actual stop and wandering the neighborhood to see friends before coming home. Totally fine, but occasionally I want to find him and tell him to get home for dinner. Need? Nah, not exactly, he always makes it home eventually. But it's a really inexpensive and easy way to make my life easier, so why not?

He also uses it to talk to friends, plan get togethers, agree to meet at the park or whatever. It's helpful b/c we don't have a landline, so at least he's not tying up my cell phone to chat with a buddy all afternoon.