Nanny while working from home in apartment?

[Anonymous]

We've been WFH since daycare closed in March and are not comfortable sending DD back now that it's open again. We initially didn't want to have another person come in to our bubble, but I'm completely burned out and thinking about looking for a nanny now. But I'm not sure how it would work in this situation. We have an 18 month old in a 2 bedroom + office apartment. No outdoor space. I can't image my kid hanging out with a nanny and not just screaming at the office door. Anyone have a similar experience?

[Anonymous]

Have the nanny take the kid out - walks, empty playgrounds, even for a drive. You are right that she should be home obly for meals and naps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:walks, empty playgrounds, even for a drive.

M-F 9-6??

[Anonymous]

I think this is doable. We have indirect experience (we're in a nanny share that's hosted at the other family's apartment). Basically - one of you is in the office, one of you is in the bedroom, and the nanny and kid have the rest of the apartment. I think the key is DO NOT come out when the kid is home. Do a good bye with him in the morning like you would when he's at daycare "Bye!! Have a great day I'll see you after work!" and then he does NOT see you until the end of the day. Should be pretty easy to arrange - I assume your kid naps in the afternoon. See if the nanny can take the kid out each morning, perhaps have a deal that they're always out from, say, 10:30 to 11:30. When they're out, you both use the bathroom and make your lunches, bringing them back to your offices. When he's napping, you get another bathroom/snack break. He may pound on your door and scream the first week, but he'll adjust fast if you stick to your guns (and make sure the nanny is clear on that rule).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think this is doable. We have indirect experience (we're in a nanny share that's hosted at the other family's apartment). Basically - one of you is in the office, one of you is in the bedroom, and the nanny and kid have the rest of the apartment. I think the key is DO NOT come out when the kid is home. Do a good bye with him in the morning like you would when he's at daycare "Bye!! Have a great day I'll see you after work!" and then he does NOT see you until the end of the day. Should be pretty easy to arrange - I assume your kid naps in the afternoon. See if the nanny can take the kid out each morning, perhaps have a deal that they're always out from, say, 10:30 to 11:30. When they're out, you both use the bathroom and make your lunches, bringing them back to your offices. When he's napping, you get another bathroom/snack break. He may pound on your door and scream the first week, but he'll adjust fast if you stick to your guns (and make sure the nanny is clear on that rule).

Nanny could get the the child out 9.30-11.30, lunch at the park, come back. Nap 12-3, then fun educational activities in the apartment. Clean up by 5, dinner at 5.30, you take over at 6. Change the times as necessary; this is based on a 9-6 schedule.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think this is doable. We have indirect experience (we're in a nanny share that's hosted at the other family's apartment). Basically - one of you is in the office, one of you is in the bedroom, and the nanny and kid have the rest of the apartment. I think the key is DO NOT come out when the kid is home. Do a good bye with him in the morning like you would when he's at daycare "Bye!! Have a great day I'll see you after work!" and then he does NOT see you until the end of the day. Should be pretty easy to arrange - I assume your kid naps in the afternoon. See if the nanny can take the kid out each morning, perhaps have a deal that they're always out from, say, 10:30 to 11:30. When they're out, you both use the bathroom and make your lunches, bringing them back to your offices. When he's napping, you get another bathroom/snack break. He may pound on your door and scream the first week, but he'll adjust fast if you stick to your guns (and make sure the nanny is clear on that rule).

This is basically what we do in our 1000 square foot house. It hasn't been too bad.

[Anonymous]

I think you need to be honest with yourself and make sure you do not micromanage the nanny. When you are working, behave like you're at work and resist the temptation to come out and check on them.

[Anonymous]

You will hate this. I know from experience. Kid will whine, you can’t help but jump in when the nanny’s not doing it right, there will be way too many people in your home, you will have another person to manage in addition to your kids. It will be so much more work. Better hire a babysitter as needed for a few hours a week for special activities, but all day everyday with you “locked” in your own home, NOPE!

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks all. For those saying the nanny takes the kid out for big chunks of the day - what about when it's 90 degrees out? Maybe this will work better in the fall.

[Anonymous]

What about finding a nanny who could host at their home? Maybe even one who has a child around the same age?

[Anonymous]

Nanny here-

The key is your have to STAY AWAY. Once you ‘rescue’ once, your child will continue to scream until you rescue the next time. As long as you can do that, this will work. If you can’t, then you can’t have a nanny in an apartment. You can come out to get a snack, give largo a kiss, rescue larla when she doesn’t get her way, come ‘make things better’ (pro tip: you’re making things worse) or come out for meals. You need to pack a lunch in a cooler and disappear from 9-6. The only way it works with WAHPs is if they disappear or the nanny has been there since birth. You are in prime separation anxiety months. Also, be mindful of your volume on zoom calls. Some days we are happily playing and then the little one will her her mom screaming on a call and being loud and then the tears start. This also goes for naps.

[Anonymous]

I meant to say you can’t come out to get a snack etc!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You will hate this. I know from experience. Kid will whine, you can’t help but jump in when the nanny’s not doing it right, there will be way too many people in your home, you will have another person to manage in addition to your kids. It will be so much more work. Better hire a babysitter as needed for a few hours a week for special activities, but all day everyday with you “locked” in your own home, NOPE!

This is the problem. You gotta know yourself. If you "can't help but jump in" this will absolutely not work. But as I, and several other PPs noted, if you actually can just stay in the office all day, you'll be fine.

It's not a nanny or a kid question, or even a space question - it's a you question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks all. For those saying the nanny takes the kid out for big chunks of the day - what about when it's 90 degrees out? Maybe this will work better in the fall.

I wrote the long-ish post at 14:00 - I think it's still fine when it's 90 degrees. The nanny can still take the kid out for a 30 min walk in the morning. I do think working with the nanny to determine a set time (even if it's just a half hour) when they are always out of the apartment (say, 10:30-11) it's workable. You do need a predictable time when you can pee and make your lunch.

[Anonymous]

We’re in an apartment and our nanny has been a godsend. She keeps DS occupied and on a schedule. Every day they go out from 8:30 to 11. Nanny brings a different activity for him to do in the park. We know we will not be interrupted during this time and schedule accordingly. They come back after 11 and have lunch which also occupies DS. Then DH and I accept our child will want us and might interrupt us until nap at 12:30. We, again, can count on the next two hours of uninterrupted work. Snack and play or walk outside until 4:30 when nanny leaves.

It also help that we all get along so well and respect each other. Nanny made it clear that she will never pull DS away from us so if we had a vital call, we should go into the bathroom!