Help me institute quiet time for almost 4 year old

[Anonymous]

Our kid will be 4 in August. She dropped her nap almost a year ago, but, when in preschool, she'd sit quietly on her cot and look at books while other kids slept. When COVID struck, she refused to do quiet time in her room and we were often on zoom calls in the afternoons, so instead of enforcing quiet time, we just put on the TV from 2-4. We couldn't enforce quiet time and deal with work calls at the same time since she was constantly coming out of her room/crying for us.

My work has calmed down, and I no longer have meetings in the afternoon. So, now I can enforce quiet time. How would you start? She says she's "scared" to be in her room alone (and she legit seems anxious about it). We got a "OK to wake" clock, but that just seems to make her more anxious--she cries "IT'S STILL RED" every few minutes. Thoughts on how we can make quiet time less stressful for her? I want her to re-learn how to self-entertain--e.g. look at books, play with her stuffed animals, etc.

[Anonymous]

I used to put on some soft music in DS room, she could come out when it was over.
I would also try a shorter quiet time. See if she can do half an hour in her room, then work up to an hour.

[Anonymous]

What if it were you that was not available .. like you wear a special hat and you're not available

[Anonymous]

I'd ease in. Start with 10 minutes, give in a little time for her to get used to it (a few days) then maybe jump to 20?

[Anonymous]

Can you sit outside the door?

[Anonymous]

If she is an only child the house I’m assuming is pretty quiet.... let her look at books or play with legos, block , etc in her room.

[Anonymous]

We use an ok to wake clock as well. Definitely start shorter - 20 minutes tops. We do a treat & tv time if 4yo doesn’t call me before his light is on. Pre COVID we would agree on a fun activity afterwards. Do you have a pet that can stay in the room with her?

[Anonymous]

We lock our kids doors for an hour every day. Despite some resistance, they have uninterrupted imaginative play with their dollhouse or legos and it’s so good!

[Anonymous]

Start shorter and work up to 2 hrs. I would tell my daughter if she was really good and stayed in quiet time than afterwards I would have a fun craft or activity set up. Close to 4 she became obsessed with Legos which I only allow her to play with in her room because I have a toddler as well. Maybe there's a toy or activity you could limit to quiet time only?

[Anonymous]

I got my sons accustomed to quiet time by giving them books on cd. There was one in particular that was a collection of 4 stories, and that was at least an hour. But I agree to start shorter and gradually go longer.

[Anonymous]

Mine gets his iPad locked to the Spotify kids app. He loves to listen to his songs and audiobooks and play with legos. I’ve found that playing with him for 5-10 minutes (usually with a timer) gets him interested then I can leave. I go downstairs after that as if I’m upstairs I deal with constant coming out of his room.

[Anonymous]

My son at that age loved to listen to kid podcasts in his room while he played. He still does and he is 7.

[Anonymous]

I agree with starting shorter—much shorter—and working your way up to an hour. I think 2 hours is a LONG time to expect a child to entertain themselves. Some kids do it, but don’t expect every child to happily be alone in a house with mom and dad nearby and quietly play or read for 2 whole hours.

[Anonymous]

DS was resistant at first. We started with 15 minutes and added 10 every few days. He stays in his room for 2 hours now. He also likes books on CD and music. We bought a ton of old music CDs at the Salvation Army. Sometimes he isn’t that “quiet” but he stays in his room which is all I care about.

[Anonymous]

Mine was resistant at first and I let her "cry it out" a bit (she was 3 almost 4). You need to do quiet time fairly consistently every day for it to stick. It's been good for my kiddo because she is a bit of a clinger and now I hear her doing lots of imaginary play while I am "sleeping'. I used to shut my door but now I leave it ajar. The playroom is right next to my bedroom so I give her free reign in there. She plays by herself for about 20-40 minutes. I tried using an ok to wake clock but she would come in before the time went off.