Feeling defeated

[Anonymous]

I feel like DH and I are fighting an uphill battle that yes isn't as bad as other people's battles but it's still a fight. I'll be 34 in a few months.Very overweight. 230 pounds at 5'5. DH is also very overweight. I have irregular periods- every other month. Sometimes skip 2-3. Always have since I was 13. Sex is extremely painful. All the time. We've been ttc and it hasn't been successful. Looking to see a RE and get acupuncture started here.

Our best friends have a sweetest baby and they keep asking about us. I haven't felt comfortable sharing our journey. My husband's best friend and his wife are expecting and when I found out I just cried. It stings. It sucks. It's illogical I know.

My in laws are so insensitive. They know we have been trying and they know I'm not pregnant. But they constantly make comments.

Ex. We were discussing potential career changes for me due to covid-19 and his dad says what about being a mommy. That's a job. You could have a baby.

WTF.

His mom, in the most ridiculous move. She's probably animal crossing. A video game where you decorate a home and an island and she texts saying she's decorating a nursery for her grandkids (she doesn't have any) in her video game house so she can pretend to be a grandma.

The actual F?

And this is just this week. Every week it's another comment.

Just feeling really defeated. DH made our dentist appts for next week and the secretary said oh leave the baby home. Bc she thought we had a baby. I know it's coincidental but it just makes me feel so defeated.

[Anonymous]

Hi OP. Also 34 and ttc and its not happening. Many of my friends are pregnant or just had a baby. It stings and I feel defeated too. Hopefully things turn around for both of us.

[Anonymous]

Have you been diagnosed with pcos?

I’d get into a RE ASAP and get on letrozole. I’m 31, overweight and have pcos. Spent 3 years trying and finally found an amazing RE and got pregnant 4th round of letrozole, ovidrel shot and timed intercourse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP. Also 34 and ttc and its not happening. Many of my friends are pregnant or just had a baby. It stings and I feel defeated too. Hopefully things turn around for both of us.

Same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you been diagnosed with pcos?

I’d get into a RE ASAP and get on letrozole. I’m 31, overweight and have pcos. Spent 3 years trying and finally found an amazing RE and got pregnant 4th round of letrozole, ovidrel shot and timed intercourse.

No pcos. Congratulations.

[Anonymous]

No advice, just sympathy. Your ILs are dicks. Hugs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you been diagnosed with pcos?

I’d get into a RE ASAP and get on letrozole. I’m 31, overweight and have pcos. Spent 3 years trying and finally found an amazing RE and got pregnant 4th round of letrozole, ovidrel shot and timed intercourse.

No pcos. Congratulations.

You’ve been tested for pcos? Because the lack of periods sounds like a classic pcos symptom/irregular ovulation

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you been diagnosed with pcos?

I’d get into a RE ASAP and get on letrozole. I’m 31, overweight and have pcos. Spent 3 years trying and finally found an amazing RE and got pregnant 4th round of letrozole, ovidrel shot and timed intercourse.

No pcos. Congratulations.

You’ve been tested for pcos? Because the lack of periods sounds like a classic pcos symptom/irregular ovulation

Yes I've been tested multiple times.

I have a history of eating disorders ages 11-26. The damage done to my body has always been cited as cause.

[Anonymous]

Definitely see a new RE who can address your irregular periods. You need to know if and when you’re ovulating and there are treatments for that. If you’re in the DC area, Dr. Abbasi at CFA treats everyone, no matter weight or history. Some clinics have strict guidelines and will not treat patients over a certain BMI. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Don't spend any more time TTC on your own. RE immediately!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't spend any more time TTC on your own. RE immediately!

My husband works for a certain hospital and we have to stay within that system for insurance purposes. There is a weight guideline.

But making an appt to discuss things to do/option s while I lose the weight required

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't spend any more time TTC on your own. RE immediately!

I know this comment is meant to help but it can be incredibly stress inducing

[Anonymous]

Your ILs sound annoying. I would ask DH to tell them that you guys are trying and not to mention babies in front of you. I don’t understand the dental receptionist. Why would she assume you have a baby?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your ILs sound annoying. I would ask DH to tell them that you guys are trying and not to mention babies in front of you. I don’t understand the dental receptionist. Why would she assume you have a baby?

she just mistook us for another couple. She apologized and said she was mistaken.

[Anonymous]

Slightly different stats but we have also been trying for a while and recently sought professional help. Please, please go see a fertility specialist ASAP. Someone said upthread this suggestion causes stress. But our experience has been that it has alleviated a LOT of stress to have an expert look at our case and help us make a plan to move forward. If you have been trying for a while there is no point to just waiting and waiting and hoping next month is the lucky one. There may very well be things you can do to improve your odds.

I know it gets mixed reviews on this board but so far have been pleased with Shady Grove Fertility. Dr. O'Brien is very kind and happy to answer questions. I normally don't like doctors but I love her.

I am so sorry about the insensitive comments, I have experienced similar and it is extremely painful.