4yo waking at 4am

[Anonymous]

Little backstory - pre quarantine, 4yo was sleeping 7pm-6am. I pushed to 7:30pm and kept it for a month, but he was consistently waking at 5am and night terrors from overtired were getting bad. Moved back to 6:45 for a week until he was sleeping til 5:30. We’ve now been at 7pm for quite awhile, but the past 3 weeks, he’s either waking at 3:30, 4:15, or 5:30. His OK to Wake light is still set for 6am, but he’s up and playing loudly well before then and has decided he doesn’t need to stay in his room. He’s trying to wake both older brothers, in and out of our room, bothering the dogs, etc. I attempted an earlier bedtime last night to try to reset again, but, despite being up since 4am, he didn’t fall asleep til 7pm and was up at 4am again today. I have tried sticker charts, taking away tv, and even offered ice cream for breakfast if he could stay quietly in his room til 6, and nothing has worked. He’s also a mess by late afternoon because of being so tired. He plays all day with his brothers, is outside running around the yard and doing water play, he’s probably getting more physical activity than pre-quarantine... I don’t know what to do to get back to 11 hours, which seems to be what he needs to help regulate his emotions and not have night terrors. Any ideas other than melatonin or essential oils?

[Anonymous]

Sounds like an overtired cycle since he's crashing in the afternoon. Not what you asked for, but if you've really tried everything, I'd do a few days of melatonin to help him reset his sleep cycle. I have a friend that's a pediatric neuropsychologist who swears up and down melatonin is safe and useful for situations like these.

[Anonymous]

I’m sorry, OP. I have no answers but wanted to let you know we’ve been there. My second woke up between 4-4:30 for almost a year. We tried everything. She had to grow out of it. I really hope you find a solution!

[Anonymous]

Just stick with 6:30-6:45pm as long as necessary. He’s still overtired and hasn’t caught up yet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just stick with 6:30-6:45pm as long as necessary. He’s still overtired and hasn’t caught up yet.

I’m this pp and the early bedtime was the only thing that got rid of our DD’s night terrors.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thank you! Wednesday night, he was asleep at 6:45 and woke screaming every hour or 2 between 10:30pm & 5:30am - but at least he wasn’t up for the day at 4. Last night, he was asleep by 6:45pm, started the same pattern... at 1:30am I offered to let him come sleep with us & he slept in our bed straight to 5:30. I’m considering it a win as he did make it nearly 11 hours and he usually refuses to sleep in our bed (would highly prefer me in his). I feel more rested today than I have all week. It stinks to have to put him to bed so early in the summer, but I guess it is what it is.

[Anonymous]

Is he napping during the day? If you want him to sleep later why’s not have him go to bed later? FWIW For my 3 year old, 7pm bedtime would be extremely early.

His sleep pattern has been out of wack over the past few months but we still target about 8:30-9pm bedtime and then he sleeps til about 8am or so. Doesn’t always happen but that’s our goal. He’s not napping a whole lot lately so that ensures he is tired out

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is he napping during the day? If you want him to sleep later why’s not have him go to bed later? FWIW For my 3 year old, 7pm bedtime would be extremely early.

His sleep pattern has been out of wack over the past few months but we still target about 8:30-9pm bedtime and then he sleeps til about 8am or so. Doesn’t always happen but that’s our goal. He’s not napping a whole lot lately so that ensures he is tired out

If it works for your child that’s awesome, but my kids once they stopped napping could definitely not stay up that late for a couple more years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is he napping during the day? If you want him to sleep later why’s not have him go to bed later? FWIW For my 3 year old, 7pm bedtime would be extremely early.

His sleep pattern has been out of wack over the past few months but we still target about 8:30-9pm bedtime and then he sleeps til about 8am or so. Doesn’t always happen but that’s our goal. He’s not napping a whole lot lately so that ensures he is tired out

He hasn’t napped consistently for since 18 months and hasn’t napped at all in at least a year. I’ve never been able to shift his wake time by pushing bedtime later, unfortunately.

[Anonymous]

My 4 yr old sleeps from 8:30-8:30 at night and 2-3:30 during the day. What's your nap schedule like?

Every once in a while sleep schedule will get off, but consistency is key. Give him a clock and teach him that he needs to stay in bed until a certain time. He will go back to sleep and not get overtired during the day.

Imagine if you woke up and didn't know what time it was - what would you do? You'd get up and really wake yourself up - even if you actually needed more sleep. Then, you'd be pretty tired all day and then crash at night. Kids at that age need clocks.