Surrogate Mom/Breast Cancer Patient

[Anonymous]

I was diagnosed with breast cancer while pregnant (now have a 3 month old baby girl). My doctor now wants me to begin chemotherapy, which I will begin tomorrow. Luckily, my doctor was okay with my husband I freezing some embryos before we started treatment and we were able to freeze 18 embryos during one IVF cycle. I will be 41 when those five years are up. The issue is that after I do chemotherapy, I have to take a drug (tamoxifen) for the next five years and I cannot be pregnant while I am on this drug. Plus the type of cancer I have is fuled by estrogen - so pregnancy may be risky in the future. So, me and my husband have decided to go ahead and pursue the surrogacy option in the next year/ year and a half. I'm trying to get a ball park cost for what the amount would be - we have already paid for the IVF portion but of course we would have to pay for everything else. We're trying to figure out how much we would have to save. Thanks if you have any input. (BTW - prognosis is good once treatment is done - less than 7% risk of recurrence so am happy for that).

[Anonymous]

hi we used a gestational carrier and our DD was born in 2006. The cost to the carrier, 32K plus her IVF costs. The whole thing, including lawyers' fees, IVF, etc. cost 72K. If you want to contact me for more info, let me know. I'm very sorry you have to go through all of this. You're incredibly strong.

[Anonymous]

So sorry about your diagnosis. Wishing you all the very best.

We are currently expecting twins via a gestational surrogate. I think the pp's cost estimate is pretty accurate although we had some unfortunate false starts which increased our costs somewhat. Feel free to contact me also if you have any questions but I will include a brief summary of the costs below. Remember these DO NOT include the cost of meds for the GS's cycle (about $4000), the IVF Fees (about $27-30k), legal gees for parents ($2500) and agency fees if you go through one to get a surrogate. we used a very good one which costs app $10000 but some can be more expensive. You could also find a surrogate independently. Websites such at surromomsonline.com and allaboutsurrogacy.com have lots of classified ads. Again, please feel free to contact me if you want more info.

· compensation for Gestational Carrier 20, 000

· Multiple Fee 3000 twins 5000 triplets

· Attorney Fee 100% of cost - was $1000

· Maternity clothing allowance $500 singleton $850 multiples

· Monthly allowance (will itemize until monthly allowance begins) $300

· Invasive procedure Amnio, CVS, D&C/E, HSG, cerclage, etc. 500

· Abortion, S/R $500

· Per Transfer Fee $650

· Mock cycle or canceled cycle $250

· Loss of Reproductive Organs due to Surrogacy related complications up to 6 months after delivery 3k

· Life Insurance Premium for 1 year or duration of cycling and pregnancy for 300k policy 100% of cost approx 300-400 for a year (policy will need to be written after contracts are signed, but before the first injection)

· C-section Fee $2000

· Any amounts not covered by insurance

· All compensation to be placed in an escrow account established no later than contract signing

· Housekeeping to begin at 30 weeks if pregnant with multiples

· Childcare and weekly Housekeeping, if Doctor orders bed rest Childcare hourly amount? 5$ per kid per hour Housekeeping weekly amount? $100 If you are on doctor ordered bed rest what amount is acceptable per week for childcare and housekeeping combined? $350

· For transfer and screening Gestational Carrier may travel with Spouse/Partner or companion. All travel for carrier plus one companion, including food, lodging, transportation, mileage, lost wages for surrogate and spouse/partner (no lost wages for companion), if necessary

[Anonymous]

Thanks you guys for the responses and detailed information. This is exactly what I was looking for. Would you mind telling me how long it took for you to find a surrogate? We were thinking of beginning the search/signing with an agency approximately 3 months before we would like to begin the process.

[Anonymous]

we found a surrogate in February, a month after we were looking- we wanted someone who had done it before, so she knew what to expect, who was local so we could go to every dr's appointment, and ideally someone who had a good support network - in our case she was married with children of her own.
We transferred embryos in June.

Shady grove fertility, our practice, referred us to their surrogacy team and the nurse coordinator there was a gem - they gave us names of lawyers (i believe 1 or 2) that they routinely use to find a match. In addition, we explored and strongly considered a group in with an offices in annapolis and california (the one that Joan Lunden used). Their price was about 30K higher. We really liked the staff etc., but with the difference in price and them telling us that we may not be able to find someone local (or geographically close to us) we decided not to use them.

We didn't want to go the route to find one ourselves on line, at that point we were so defeated and down that we needed someone to help us navigate the process for us and make it happen. I do recall upon first meeting the lawyer in January telling her our goal was to transfer by December of that year, and she told us it wouldn't take that long, that we would be able to find someone within a few months of looking. And, we did.

i hope this helps. let me know if you need any other information. take care.

[Anonymous]

Thanks again! I am happy that it happened so soon for you. I am hopeful that we will be that lucky when we are ready.

[Anonymous]

I hope it does too!