Neighborhood play groups

[Anonymous]

We're in northern VA, and over the past week, our once-cautious neighborhood has become less so, and the kids are playing outside in groups. My 6-year-old son REALLY wants to join a group of his friends but we're so far saying no. The parents of some of the other kids are essential workers so their exposure is probably greater. Are we being too cautious at this point? I really don't like depriving my son of all contact with peers, but I also don't want to get Covid.

[Anonymous]

Please stick to your decision, OP. These kids have parents who are essential workers and therefore more exposed every single day--you said it yourself. You have ZERO way to know what those parents' jobs really entail (and they're not going to give you a full and frank picture if they are desperate for their kids to have play dates). You cannot know how well those parents deal with possibly contaminated clothes, shoes, gear when they return home from those jobs.

You will get posts on here telling you that "kids can't get it" or "kids can get it but it's mild!" or "kids can't really give it to adults." I've seen all that nonsense and variations of it here and all over other sites as well. All are wrong. Of course children TEND to have milder infections yet when the infections aren't mild--they can turn very serious indeed, like with the new condition called MIS-C. Say that, though, and you get the "You are living in terror! It's not gonna happen! So rare!" posts.

It's very, very hard to tell a kid no when he sees other kids running around but if ever there was a time to deal with the guilt you might feel and be the adult -- this is it. Think ahead. Have plenty to distract him and things for him to do during the times when you know the other kids are outside and he can see and hear them. Don't let this be a random day to day frustration for him; have a plan and a list of things, get supplies you need for his projects, whatever.

And ignore the many posts you'll get railing about the overblown pandemic, the overestimated threat to young kids, blah blah. YOU know you are not willing to take the risk and you are better informed, or just more willing to listen to science, than many people. Including the other playdate parents.

[Anonymous]

PP says you can listen to her and ignore everyone else because she is the only one who is right.

I tend to distrust that kind of person. Especially in a situation where things are moving quickly and we are learning more every day.

We are doing small group play dates outside. You make your own choice.

[Anonymous]

Not all essential workers are healthcare workers.

DH and I are both essential workers, and neither of us work in healthcare or any setting where we would be exposed to COVID.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP says you can listen to her and ignore everyone else because she is the only one who is right.

I tend to distrust that kind of person. Especially in a situation where things are moving quickly and we are learning more every day.

We are doing small group play dates outside. You make your own choice.

+1. We're in this for the long haul. If it's sustainable for your child's mental health to quarantine indefinitely, then that's safest for sure. If your child is suffering, then I think it's reasonable to balance physical and mental health and allow some limited play dates. We do outdoor play dates with a few close friends, and just started a summer nanny share with another family.

[Anonymous]

Kids are allowed to play in groups of 10 or fewer in phase 1.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP says you can listen to her and ignore everyone else because she is the only one who is right.

I tend to distrust that kind of person. Especially in a situation where things are moving quickly and we are learning more every day.

We are doing small group play dates outside. You make your own choice.

Why no! I'm PP and I'm not the only one who's right. OP is right too!

Enjoy your play dates. You made your decision, as you say, and it's one that would make me distrust you. We are indeed learning more every day. And what we're learning is not necessarily good. But a lot of parents are choosing to focus only on "learning" what fits what they already want to do. Your decision, after all.

[Anonymous]

OP- Our oldest is 16.5 yo and his group is starting to get together and we don't allow it. He's helping his grandparents (65 and 71) and we also want to see how all the opening up makes a difference. We (the parents) are also not socializing so as not to be hypocrites.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Kids are allowed to play in groups of 10 or fewer in phase 1.

Sure, if they're wearing masks or staying 6 feet apart. That's not what's happening in my neighborhood.

[Anonymous]

We are not allowing it. The authorities all over the US are easing up too soon. They are not even following the official White House guidance for reopening. Gotta think for yourself.

[Anonymous]

For better or worse, people have moved on.

[Anonymous]

We live in the Midwest (also in Phase I) and, as of a week ago, allowed our 4-yo to play with one close friend outside. We know and trust the friend's family, so that helped with the decision. I think we are in this for the long haul and there are a spectrum of reasonable choices. The case rates in our zip code are very low; if that were to change, our decisions would also.

We are waiting a bit longer for things like daycare (for our 22-month-old), camp, or group play dates. We'll revisit those next month after we've had a chance to see what evolves as things open up.

[Anonymous]

We let our kids play. Enough is enough.

[Anonymous]

I would allow it. No going in anyone’s house and no one coming in yours. Wash his hands as soon as he comes in.

[Anonymous]

We let our kids play outside with the neighbors’ kids. But you don’t have to if you are not comfortable with it.