Sleep Training Tips for 15MO

[Anonymous]

My 15-month-old has a number of bad sleep habits like cosleeping and nursing throughout the night, and I would like to work on sleep training him. He sleeps part of the night in a toddler bed right now. We didn’t have any luck with the crib because he screams bloody murder every time he is put in one. The toddler bed has definitely improved that, but it also comes with a challenge that he can get out of bed whenever he pleases. We tried Ferber around 9MO, but he cried for hours and hours multiple nights in a row, so we gave up. We tried the sleep lady shuffle two months ago with my husband handling all wake-ups in his toddler bed so he wasn’t nursing at night at all, but a month in, he was still waking up between five and 10 times a night. My husband was usually able to get him back to sleep by touching his back for a few seconds and saying some comforting words, but if he didn’t go in, our son would escalate in his crime and become inconsolable. I am really just at a loss of what to do. It seems like extinction might be the only strategy we have left, but I am just not comfortable letting him cry alone for hours which I know he would do. If it was just a bit of crying, that would be a different story. Any suggestions?

[Anonymous]

You have backed yourself into a corner. He will absolutely cry for hours during extinction, esp since he has learned that it works. So either commit to at least a week of full-blown extinction (with a fully Toddler-proofed room and a lock on the door if needed) or commit to co-sleeping for the next few years. There are gentle sleep-training approaches but he’s too old for them now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 15-month-old has a number of bad sleep habits like cosleeping and nursing throughout the night, and I would like to work on sleep training him. He sleeps part of the night in a toddler bed right now. We didn’t have any luck with the crib because he screams bloody murder every time he is put in one. The toddler bed has definitely improved that, but it also comes with a challenge that he can get out of bed whenever he pleases. We tried Ferber around 9MO, but he cried for hours and hours multiple nights in a row, so we gave up. We tried the sleep lady shuffle two months ago with my husband handling all wake-ups in his toddler bed so he wasn’t nursing at night at all, but a month in, he was still waking up between five and 10 times a night. My husband was usually able to get him back to sleep by touching his back for a few seconds and saying some comforting words, but if he didn’t go in, our son would escalate in his crime and become inconsolable. I am really just at a loss of what to do. It seems like extinction might be the only strategy we have left, but I am just not comfortable letting him cry alone for hours which I know he would do. If it was just a bit of crying, that would be a different story. Any suggestions?

Get a bigger bed and cosleep... even better I would put a bed/mattress next to his toddler bed and sleep with him in the same room. I am very much anti sleepy training though so you probably want a different solution. All of our kids ended up sleeping in their rooms alone around 2/2.5 and never come to our bed at night (it never happened). We all slept much better and nobody was left crying and throwing up (because plenty of kids get so upset that they end up throwing up... that’s how stressed out they are).
For a year or so you won’t share a bed with your husband so you will need to make time for each other before you go to bed. If the baby wakes up a lot (more than twice) then maybe talk to a pediatrician. My husband and I would alternate nights so that we both got several nights of uninterrupted sleep per week.
Good luck

[Anonymous]

Go ahead and call me an a**hole everyone, but this is why you sleep train at 4 months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 15-month-old has a number of bad sleep habits like cosleeping and nursing throughout the night, and I would like to work on sleep training him. He sleeps part of the night in a toddler bed right now. We didn’t have any luck with the crib because he screams bloody murder every time he is put in one. The toddler bed has definitely improved that, but it also comes with a challenge that he can get out of bed whenever he pleases. We tried Ferber around 9MO, but he cried for hours and hours multiple nights in a row, so we gave up. We tried the sleep lady shuffle two months ago with my husband handling all wake-ups in his toddler bed so he wasn’t nursing at night at all, but a month in, he was still waking up between five and 10 times a night. My husband was usually able to get him back to sleep by touching his back for a few seconds and saying some comforting words, but if he didn’t go in, our son would escalate in his crime and become inconsolable. I am really just at a loss of what to do. It seems like extinction might be the only strategy we have left, but I am just not comfortable letting him cry alone for hours which I know he would do. If it was just a bit of crying, that would be a different story. Any suggestions?

Get a bigger bed and cosleep... even better I would put a bed/mattress next to his toddler bed and sleep with him in the same room. I am very much anti sleepy training though so you probably want a different solution. All of our kids ended up sleeping in their rooms alone around 2/2.5 and never come to our bed at night (it never happened). We all slept much better and nobody was left crying and throwing up (because plenty of kids get so upset that they end up throwing up... that’s how stressed out they are).
For a year or so you won’t share a bed with your husband so you will need to make time for each other before you go to bed. If the baby wakes up a lot (more than twice) then maybe talk to a pediatrician. My husband and I would alternate nights so that we both got several nights of uninterrupted sleep per week.
Good luck

I actually wouldn’t mind cosleeping for another year if I could kick his night nursing habbit and guarantee DS wouldn’t be cosleeping for years. We want to have another baby in the next year and want DS in his own room by then. It is verry difficult to get DS back to sleep without nursing if I’m in the room with him though. DH can’t sleep in the room with DS because he uses a CPAP machine, and there is nowhere good to plug it in next to DS’s toddler bed.

[Anonymous]

OP is asking for recommendations as to what she can do, not what she should have done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 15-month-old has a number of bad sleep habits like cosleeping and nursing throughout the night, and I would like to work on sleep training him. He sleeps part of the night in a toddler bed right now. We didn’t have any luck with the crib because he screams bloody murder every time he is put in one. The toddler bed has definitely improved that, but it also comes with a challenge that he can get out of bed whenever he pleases. We tried Ferber around 9MO, but he cried for hours and hours multiple nights in a row, so we gave up. We tried the sleep lady shuffle two months ago with my husband handling all wake-ups in his toddler bed so he wasn’t nursing at night at all, but a month in, he was still waking up between five and 10 times a night. My husband was usually able to get him back to sleep by touching his back for a few seconds and saying some comforting words, but if he didn’t go in, our son would escalate in his crime and become inconsolable. I am really just at a loss of what to do. It seems like extinction might be the only strategy we have left, but I am just not comfortable letting him cry alone for hours which I know he would do. If it was just a bit of crying, that would be a different story. Any suggestions?

Get a bigger bed and cosleep... even better I would put a bed/mattress next to his toddler bed and sleep with him in the same room. I am very much anti sleepy training though so you probably want a different solution. All of our kids ended up sleeping in their rooms alone around 2/2.5 and never come to our bed at night (it never happened). We all slept much better and nobody was left crying and throwing up (because plenty of kids get so upset that they end up throwing up... that’s how stressed out they are).
For a year or so you won’t share a bed with your husband so you will need to make time for each other before you go to bed. If the baby wakes up a lot (more than twice) then maybe talk to a pediatrician. My husband and I would alternate nights so that we both got several nights of uninterrupted sleep per week.
Good luck

I actually wouldn’t mind cosleeping for another year if I could kick his night nursing habbit and guarantee DS wouldn’t be cosleeping for years. We want to have another baby in the next year and want DS in his own room by then. It is verry difficult to get DS back to sleep without nursing if I’m in the room with him though. DH can’t sleep in the room with DS because he uses a CPAP machine, and there is nowhere good to plug it in next to DS’s toddler bed.

Can’t you find a way to have your toddler near your bed then?

[Anonymous]

Can you move the toddler bed in to your room?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go ahead and call me an a**hole everyone, but this is why you sleep train at 4 months.

+1

I would say, at this age, with what sounds like a serious attempt at extinction and a serious attempt at the sleep lady shuffle under your belt, with so many different issues - age, not liking the crib, sometimes nursing, etc, if you can afford it, I would definitely hire a sleep consultant. You need expert guidance.

[Anonymous]

I'd recommend The Sleep Easy Solution. They have a chapter on sleep training a toddler and how to adjust it. I used it to sleep train my 6 month old with success.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go ahead and call me an a**hole everyone, but this is why you sleep train at 4 months.

+1

I would say, at this age, with what sounds like a serious attempt at extinction and a serious attempt at the sleep lady shuffle under your belt, with so many different issues - age, not liking the crib, sometimes nursing, etc, if you can afford it, I would definitely hire a sleep consultant. You need expert guidance.

I have to add a +1 to this. The reality is it's going to be a lot harder. I think most people who sleep train do it way earlier and so it's hard to have advice.

My brother is in the same boat here. His 18 month old still cosleeps and wants to nurse all night and my brother and SIL are totally worn out at this point. It's just bit a good situation to be in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go ahead and call me an a**hole everyone, but this is why you sleep train at 4 months.

+1

I would say, at this age, with what sounds like a serious attempt at extinction and a serious attempt at the sleep lady shuffle under your belt, with so many different issues - age, not liking the crib, sometimes nursing, etc, if you can afford it, I would definitely hire a sleep consultant. You need expert guidance.

Do you have any sleep consultant recommendations? I don’t know anyone who has used one, so I wouldn’t know How to find one besides just googling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go ahead and call me an a**hole everyone, but this is why you sleep train at 4 months.

+1

I would say, at this age, with what sounds like a serious attempt at extinction and a serious attempt at the sleep lady shuffle under your belt, with so many different issues - age, not liking the crib, sometimes nursing, etc, if you can afford it, I would definitely hire a sleep consultant. You need expert guidance.

Do you have any sleep consultant recommendations? I don’t know anyone who has used one, so I wouldn’t know How to find one besides just googling.

I agree with that recommendation, I don’t know any but I’ve seen posts here asking for recommendations so you could try searching previous posts

[Anonymous]

I haven't used her personally, but in case it's helpful on of the parenting groups I am a part of people have posted about this sleep consultant multiple times and always said good things, so I thought I'd share. It sounded like she uses as gentle approaches as possible. http://compassionatesleepsolutions.com/

[Anonymous]

I coslept until oldest was 2. I weaned him at 15 months. We gave him a sweetened milk bottle at bedtime and dad laid with him till he fell asleep.


Second is now 15 months. Will wean him soon and hope to have him in toddler bed next to brother’s bed in 6 mos or so.