Embryo adoption

[Anonymous]

For those who adopted frozen embryos, was embryo adoption free? What was the process and how long was the wait?

[Anonymous]

I have not done this but I have friends who adopted embryos. There are no standard answers to these questions because every clinic and program is different. You can dig around on BabyCenter and find some good information on various programs. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Pved.org is super helpful and supportive website/organization. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

It most definitely would not be free from lawyer fees alone. But if it cost 30K to get the embryos and store them I imagine there would be something to pay.

[Anonymous]

There are definitely fees for all the admin, lawyers and FET costs. Not sure if there’s a fee that goes to the donors though. It is not a way for people to recover IVF costs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are definitely fees for all the admin, lawyers and FET costs. Not sure if there’s a fee that goes to the donors though. It is not a way for people to recover IVF costs.

We donated embryos and there was no fee. I think it would be unusual for donors to pay a fee. If anything, donating the embryos enabled us to cut costs because we no longer had to pay storage fees.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are definitely fees for all the admin, lawyers and FET costs. Not sure if there’s a fee that goes to the donors though. It is not a way for people to recover IVF costs.

We donated embryos and there was no fee. I think it would be unusual for donors to pay a fee. If anything, donating the embryos enabled us to cut costs because we no longer had to pay storage fees.

Do you think it’s weird to have other people raise your biological children?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are definitely fees for all the admin, lawyers and FET costs. Not sure if there’s a fee that goes to the donors though. It is not a way for people to recover IVF costs.

We donated embryos and there was no fee. I think it would be unusual for donors to pay a fee. If anything, donating the embryos enabled us to cut costs because we no longer had to pay storage fees.

Do you think it’s weird to have other people raise your biological children?

Honestly, sometimes it stings. Sometimes it feels absolutely nuts. Sometimes it feels really nice.

Most of the time we don't think about the new kids at all -- we keep forgetting their names. We are very busy with our own kids and simply don't have the emotional or intellectual bandwidth to focus much on the new kids.

[Anonymous]

Was the couple obligated to tell you about the baby?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Was the couple obligated to tell you about the baby?

It's an open adoption and we are in regular contact with the other family. Technically, we have a contract that says the adopting family should update us at least once a year about the kids. But we are in touch more frequently than the contract stipulates, about once every other month.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was the couple obligated to tell you about the baby?

It's an open adoption and we are in regular contact with the other family. Technically, we have a contract that says the adopting family should update us at least once a year about the kids. But we are in touch more frequently than the contract stipulates, about once every other month.

So you are in touch every other month but still forget the kids names? That’s odd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are definitely fees for all the admin, lawyers and FET costs. Not sure if there’s a fee that goes to the donors though. It is not a way for people to recover IVF costs.

We donated embryos and there was no fee. I think it would be unusual for donors to pay a fee. If anything, donating the embryos enabled us to cut costs because we no longer had to pay storage fees.

Do you think it’s weird to have other people raise your biological children?

No. We had twins and have 3 embryos left. I can't stomach the thought of destroying the embryos, but we also cannot afford or want to have additional children (we were in our 40's when we had our twins and are now in our low 50's). We have been paying for cryopreservation for the last few years and I would love to have someone else raise these children. I remember how painful our own journey was and if we can help someone else solve their infertility problems and not destroy those children, I'm all for it. My one caveat, is that I would want to have occasional contact with the children, like photos every few years and maybe a visit every few years. I would love to know the children (I don't need them to know that we are the biological parents until they are adults, so I don't care if we are just introduced as family friends, but I would like to see the children grow).

As for the OP's question, the organizations I have looked into, there are no costs for donors. Any costs that are normally involved are picked up by the organization. Adoptive parents have fees including legal fees that they have to pay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was the couple obligated to tell you about the baby?

It's an open adoption and we are in regular contact with the other family. Technically, we have a contract that says the adopting family should update us at least once a year about the kids. But we are in touch more frequently than the contract stipulates, about once every other month.

So you are in touch every other month but still forget the kids names? That’s odd.

It's like they are the kids of friends we don't see often. Once the mom mentions the kids' names, I instantly remember. But their names don't always trip off my tongue, in part because my husband and I don't speak about them very often.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was the couple obligated to tell you about the baby?

It's an open adoption and we are in regular contact with the other family. Technically, we have a contract that says the adopting family should update us at least once a year about the kids. But we are in touch more frequently than the contract stipulates, about once every other month.

So you are in touch every other month but still forget the kids names? That’s odd.

It's like they are the kids of friends we don't see often. Once the mom mentions the kids' names, I instantly remember. But their names don't always trip off my tongue, in part because my husband and I don't speak about them very often.

Thank you for explaining a bit more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are definitely fees for all the admin, lawyers and FET costs. Not sure if there’s a fee that goes to the donors though. It is not a way for people to recover IVF costs.

We donated embryos and there was no fee. I think it would be unusual for donors to pay a fee. If anything, donating the embryos enabled us to cut costs because we no longer had to pay storage fees.

Do you think it’s weird to have other people raise your biological children?

No. We had twins and have 3 embryos left. I can't stomach the thought of destroying the embryos, but we also cannot afford or want to have additional children (we were in our 40's when we had our twins and are now in our low 50's). We have been paying for cryopreservation for the last few years and I would love to have someone else raise these children. I remember how painful our own journey was and if we can help someone else solve their infertility problems and not destroy those children, I'm all for it. My one caveat, is that I would want to have occasional contact with the children, like photos every few years and maybe a visit every few years. I would love to know the children (I don't need them to know that we are the biological parents until they are adults, so I don't care if we are just introduced as family friends, but I would like to see the children grow).

As for the OP's question, the organizations I have looked into, there are no costs for donors. Any costs that are normally involved are picked up by the organization. Adoptive parents have fees including legal fees that they have to pay.

Hi PP. We're looking into alternate family building options now after a severe Diminished Ovarian Reserve diagnosis. In short, I'm still able to carry a pregnancy, but don't have any good eggs left. If you're serious about donating, please send me a message and we can talk more. I just set up DCUMTA at gmail dot com.