Do your kids stay close to their family friends?

[Anonymous]

I was never really friends with my parents’ friends kids. My parents has me a few years later so most of their friends’ kids were older than me. I didn’t really like the guys who went to my school that my parents were friends with either. They were my age but we also were never friends.

Now I have 3 kids. We have friends with kids. When they were younger, we would get together often and have family gatherings. We would go out to eat, go on outings, host play dates and parties at the house. Now our oldest kids are turning 10-12 years old. Kids are busy with their own activities. Gatherings getting less frequent. Our kids don’t object to hanging out with family friends but they would rather hang out with their own friends from school and activities.

Are your kids friends with your family friends’ kids?

[Anonymous]

Those relationships fade over time. Kids and parents do more on their own.

[Anonymous]

Not really. In my experience .... Parents who are friends sometimes think they can socially engineer this stuff among their own children, and it does work for awhile, but by 10 they are over it and would rather be with their real friends.

[Anonymous]

Sometimes. If the kids are in the same school and do the same activities, sure.

[Anonymous]

Some yes, some no.

My closest family friend that I am still in steady contact is the daughter of my mom’s best friend. We aren’t super close but still follow each other on Instagram etc. Xmas car exchange and if she ever came to DC, I’d probably try to have her to dinner.

[Anonymous]

Usually not, and I find that it starts to get awkward because the kids start being busy or have regular friends over during get togethers or they want to not be there, but have to change plans to entertain kids of parents friends

[Anonymous]

I haven't known any of these relationships to be any deeper than pleasing the parents for the time being, that evening.

[Anonymous]

Yes. My kids and my closest friends children grew up like cousins. They all had stages of growing apart and coming back together again. Now they are all pretty tight.

[Anonymous]

No and it’s best not to push it. You really cannot choose who your kids will be friends with.

[Anonymous]

It doesn't work. My parents were still trying to provide social experiences for me as a young adult with their friends' kids and it was cringey. Just because you are friends with the parents doesn't mean the kids have anything in common with each other.

[Anonymous]

I'm 40 and still close with my mom's best friend's kids, especially her daughter. We grew up like cousins. But I don't keep in touch with most other kids of my parents' friends that we weren't as super tight with.

[Anonymous]

My kids are still little but I didn't stay in touch with my parents friends' kids (and we are from a VERY tight knit community), so I would not expect my kids to stay in touch with people either.

The only family friends I'm in touch with are people who really are like family (like our parents grew up together, went to college together, we saw each other every holiday, did family vacations together, etc...).