Please share au pair real life costs annually

[Anonymous]

Newly single mom with primary care of my children and I'm trying to figure out a way to make it work. I have one school aged child and one child who is 4. Their school and day care are close together and in our community. I'm weighing an au pair for morning getting them ready for school and drop off etc vs. hiring a caregiver. This would allow me an early start to work and easier ability to pick them up after. Since I would only need an au pair limited hours (ie before school, some after schools/occasionally driving my child to therapy and some weekends), can I request the schedule or are there rules around them not having to work weekends, etc? I can't imagine it would be more than 10-20 hours weekly.

Has anyone tried an au pair or a sitter for these kind of limited hours? What worked better for you? For what its worth, I don't make tons of money and an au pair would be a stretch but I'm trying to figure out how to make this transition work. Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Do you have a separate bedroom for the au pair? That’s a limiting factor for a lot of people.

[Anonymous]

The weekend rule (for my agency anyway) is, they have to have a day off every weekend. So they could work a half day one of the weekend days.

We have a split schedule like you're proposing. Something to consider, I know right now you're thinking in terms of bare minimum needs, but actually it's great to have another pair of hands through dinner in the evenings.

[Anonymous]

Make sure you factor in the costs of car insurance, cell phone, food, etc. in addition to the $350-$400/week cost to have the au pair.

[Anonymous]

I, too, am a single parent with primary custody of an elementary aged child and a 4yo. I debated getting an au pair, but couldn't swing the cost and couldn't find an afterschool sitter, so I do the double drop-offs and pick-ups. I should add that if your job is at all flexible (mine isn't) it might not be so bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I, too, am a single parent with primary custody of an elementary aged child and a 4yo. I debated getting an au pair, but couldn't swing the cost and couldn't find an afterschool sitter, so I do the double drop-offs and pick-ups. I should add that if your job is at all flexible (mine isn't) it might not be so bad.

My job is a bit flexible but its about an hour commute so doing drop off and pick up leaves the kids in care an extended period.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make sure you factor in the costs of car insurance, cell phone, food, etc. in addition to the $350-$400/week cost to have the au pair.

Is that the average for DC area? Thank you. That's another question I meant to ask. What would you say is the annual cost with all costs added up?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you have a separate bedroom for the au pair? That’s a limiting factor for a lot of people.

Not exactly. We have a basement space that's nicely fixed up but probably wouldn't count as a real room. There is access from the upstairs and a door to the back patio.

[Anonymous]

I served as an au pair coordinator and there are lots of costs that you won't anticipate. Many families take the au pair on vacation and when our au pair had a gas credit card that we paid, she would frequently get snacks at the gas station for herself and her three friends, she will have friends over and if your family is having pizza you will have to get an extra pizza. YOu'll worry that she doesn't have any warm winter clothes and feel compelled to throw a jacket into the cart when you are at Costco, etc. YOu'll take her to the movies. In short, if you're feeling like the costs already feel prohibitive, it will feel very difficult -- because there are wealthy families who have a lot of extra disposable income, so your au pair will hear that Regina went skiing with her family or to the Outer Banks or whatever, and it will be hard to tow the line and be like "we're never going to buy her a coffee at starbucks," etc. Do you really want to have her sitting in your living room on CHristmas and not have a gift for her to unwrap? Are you really going to ignore her birthday? That's another fifty bucks at least. etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have a separate bedroom for the au pair? That’s a limiting factor for a lot of people.

Not exactly. We have a basement space that's nicely fixed up but probably wouldn't count as a real room. There is access from the upstairs and a door to the back patio.

You could install a big sliding partition wall for privacy, perhaps. Is there a basement bathroom?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have a separate bedroom for the au pair? That’s a limiting factor for a lot of people.

Not exactly. We have a basement space that's nicely fixed up but probably wouldn't count as a real room. There is access from the upstairs and a door to the back patio.

You could install a big sliding partition wall for privacy, perhaps. Is there a basement bathroom?

It has to be a room with a door and a lock. An au pair is entitled to have a private space.

[Anonymous]

You will need more hours than you expect, imagine sick days, snow days, absent teachers, time off school ...

And as a single mom you should have time on your own here and there too Like saturday night babysitting so you can see friends or run errands by yourself.

I think this programme is your best option, it's really flexible

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You will need more hours than you expect, imagine sick days, snow days, absent teachers, time off school ...

And as a single mom you should have time on your own here and there too Like saturday night babysitting so you can see friends or run errands by yourself.

I think this programme is your best option, it's really flexible

Also, it’s much better to schedule the maximum amount of hours you’re entitled to, and then give her time off, than to start with your origins plan of scheduling the minimum needed hours and then adding on during emergencies.

If you start by telling her you need 15 hours of work, that’s what she will expect. Any weekend work will seem like an imposition even though technically they’re supposed to work 40 hours a week and one weekend day.

It’ll go over much better if you schedule all the hours and then say “Larla, it turns out I don’t need coverage this Friday night after all, feel free to go out with your friends!” This will result in a “Thank you!” If you try to be nice and schedule her fir 15 hours a week, then the one Saturday a monthyou do need a sitter, will result in disappointment or resentment on her part. Always start strict and give time off to be nice. Your relationship will be way better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make sure you factor in the costs of car insurance, cell phone, food, etc. in addition to the $350-$400/week cost to have the au pair.

Is that the average for DC area? Thank you. That's another question I meant to ask. What would you say is the annual cost with all costs added up?

No. It’s 195.75 per week.

[Anonymous]

Are you on public transit?

I wouldn’t feel comfortable with an au pair driving my kids. If it’s possible for her to get around on the bus/metro, I’d rather add $100 transportation budget than add her to my car insurance. I know you have kid therapy appointments, but remember you could schedule the AP to do all drop offs and all pick ups so that’s your only weekly kid transportation responsibility.

Personally I’d plan to add the following monthly expenses to whatever the monthly fee is:

$200 groceries
$100 transportation
$100 miscellaneous
$100 phone