"I don't want to go to school!"
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Anonymous
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How do you handle this? My DD is 4. She has been in the same daycare since she was 6 months old and in this same classroom since August. Every morning lately it has been a huge battle to get her to go. She complains she doesn't want to go, doesn't like it, and is bored. We don't fight her - we let her express her feelings - but when it is time to leave we do just put her in the car. She stops crying but is grouchy about it. After school, she is generally fine.
Her teachers report she is happy and participates in school with no behavioral issues. She is there from 8-4 or so every day. What else can we be doing? Is this just a 4 year old thing? |
Anonymous
| "Sorry, school is your job, just like work is my job. We have to just get on with it." |
Anonymous
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I wouldn't put a lot of stock in "bored". She's using a word that she's heard but it's probably not connected directly to the problem she's having.
If she's generally fine once she's in the door and she's fine after she gets home, I wouldn't worry about putting the foot down about that's just what she needs to do. If she's coming home and having a meltdown or picking a fight, I would take it very seriously and look into what is going on at school. |
Anonymous
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I would drop in and observe the class sometime. I had a friend whose son went from enjoying preschool, to crying and fighting going. They kept making him go. Shortly after two day care providers were arrested for abusing kids at the day care. It wasn't my friends kids class, but it was close enough that he was not comfortable with being at that school but had no clue how to tell his parents.
Something is normally going to explain why there was a sudden change in behavior and attitude. |
Anonymous
| OP you're handling it perfectly. I would just keep at it. |
Anonymous
| School avoidance can also be a sign of anxiety |
Anonymous
| You’re overthinking this. He’s fine. He goes to school. You pick him up. It’s fine there; it’s a fine place, you’ve vested it, I’m sure. The teachers are fine (otherwise the other parents wouldn’t send their kids), the kids are fine (otherwise the other parents wouldn’t send their kids). Your kid is a little anxious, so you need to just keep normalizing school. |
Anonymous
| I'd probably say, "Well, I don't want to go to work but I have to. But this weekend we both have Saturday. We should do something fun on Saturday. But we have to go to school and work first. Deal?" |
Anonymous
OP here. She is anxious, absolutely. A generally nervous kid who does not like any changes in routine. Do you think that this is something I should have her evaluated for? |
Anonymous
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We are going through this but it's extreme. The "you have to go" method doesn't work. I have to physically carry DS into school. I'm going to try a rewards chart where they get a sticker if they get ready for school and enter their classroom with no fuss. After 4 successful weeks, he can get a reward.
I also set an alarm in the morning that means it's time to get ready for school. The issue with my kids is they wake up early and play and then are angry they have to leave their toys to go to school. |
Anonymous
| I would also watch the reaction you give when she is protesting school. If she sees she’s getting a reaction from you, it could encourage the protesting. If you normalize school, she may too. |
Anonymous
Our nephew told my MIL that he did not want to go to school because he was being bullied. He is 6. If it’s a drastic change then something is going on at school. Try to empathize and talk to her to see why. |
Anonymous
Yep."That's too bad". |
Anonymous
Thread is about a 4 year old |
Anonymous
| 4 year olds don't tell me what they do or do not want to do. Step up and be a parent as you are her boss not the other way Around,! |