How to prove bullying

[Anonymous]

I have posted about bullying before. In short, a child is pushed or bumped into on purpose almost daily. The school took minimal actions, but cant do anything else like suspend a kid , as they say they cant prove the bully pushes. Nobody sees it, as the bully finds busy times like during transition to do it. The pushing continues and the school says "there have been allegations of pushing" but our teachers haven't seen it, nor did the students. The principal actually believes that it happens but without prove cant take any serious actions. I am shocked. What to do?

[Anonymous]

Can you ask for more protections? Your child can transition a min early or two min late? He or she can transition with an adult. They are not near each other during transition. If you can get the school on board with that, then you can show intent when the bully is lingering two min after the transition and is late and pushes. Or leave the room without permission one min early to get your kid. It should also help limit their contact - which is if you can do that it protects your kid

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thank you . Yes I have asked for protection
. Sitting has changed and when transition happens in class , one tables gets up and do it then the other. But still it happens somehow, when they have specials/outside etc. It bothers me that when the school talks to my child I have a feeling that they ask the questions kind of in an assuming way, taking the bully' s side. (Like the teacher would say :no way it could have happened during this time because ....). But she hasn't been watching the two of them non stop so she cant tell.

[Anonymous]

Tell your kid to punch the kid in the stomach when witnesses aren't around. A sucker punch is justified in this situation if your kid isn't athletic or is overly nervous.

[Anonymous]

They need a hall monitor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tell your kid to punch the kid in the stomach when witnesses aren't around. A sucker punch is justified in this situation if your kid isn't athletic or is overly nervous.

Or kick out the kid's knee sideways. The other kid will go down and not get up.

[Anonymous]

Ball busting always works too

[Anonymous]

How old is your child? This is really not ok. Is this a private school? When speaking to the school, you need to use buzz words - targeted harassment, your child does not feel safe, your child cannot perform in school when he doesn't feel safe.

One of my friends had to go and sit in the office all day, saying that she clearly needed to be there since the school was not keeping her child safe.

The school is passing the buck here and it isn't okay. I'm sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old is your child? This is really not ok. Is this a private school? When speaking to the school, you need to use buzz words - targeted harassment, your child does not feel safe, your child cannot perform in school when he doesn't feel safe.

One of my friends had to go and sit in the office all day, saying that she clearly needed to be there since the school was not keeping her child safe.

The school is passing the buck here and it isn't okay. I'm sorry.

Basically there doesn't have to be a witness. It is enough that your child feels they are not safe. And my friend was successful. The principal did not want her sitting in the lobby all day every day. Within a couple of hours the situation was resolved.

[Anonymous]

I will just say, as a kid who was bullied, please do whatever you have to do to protect your child. Be the squeaky wheel and don’t take no for an answer. I was bullied severely as a kid for years and my parents tried to push the school administration to deal with it but this was years ago when people thought a little bullying was good for kids to toughen them up so nothing was done, and I ended up in the same class as the bullies for several years. It’s had a lasting impact on me and I have had to work hard at forgiving my parents for not doing more to stand up for me. It really impacted my personality and self confidence and trust in others.

[Anonymous]

Maybe ask the teacher if she can assign a buddy for your kid (or implement some sort of buddy system in general)?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will just say, as a kid who was bullied, please do whatever you have to do to protect your child. Be the squeaky wheel and don’t take no for an answer. I was bullied severely as a kid for years and my parents tried to push the school administration to deal with it but this was years ago when people thought a little bullying was good for kids to toughen them up so nothing was done, and I ended up in the same class as the bullies for several years. It’s had a lasting impact on me and I have had to work hard at forgiving my parents for not doing more to stand up for me. It really impacted my personality and self confidence and trust in others.

+1. But the worst was being shamed about it. To their credit, my parents quickly realized that was a mistake.

[Anonymous]

How old is your child?

[Anonymous]

OP here. My kid is in 4th grade. So why, barely can say "stop pushing " even that with my coaching. Like "use a stern voice". I don't think she can push or kick. And the other kid, the bully can be unpredictable. I think there are anger issues. I like the idea of sitting in the lobby

[Anonymous]

You really need to go over the school’s head. Contact the principal’s supervisor and keep going up.