DD5 kindergarten crying on Monday mornings

[Anonymous]

DD5 ( kindergarten ) on Mondays has started crying before school...today it's been the second time on Monday. I get it, she doesn't want to go and when asked why she just says that she doesn't like it. After school she is fine and usually every day for the week she is ready to go back to school in the morning. Is this just a rough spot for her right now, is she testing, or is anyone else experiencing this?

[Anonymous]

My DD is normally fine in the morning, but we had several weeks where Sunday nights at bedtime were pretty teary. I think it's just hard for these little kids! Kindergarten is HARD. And she knew the week would be long and tough and was feeling anxious about it. What helped my kid was to just acknowledge her feelings, without trying to talk her out of it. So I stopped trying to put a positive spin on things. So no saying "But you'll see Jenny and play and have gym class!". Instead I'd just say "yes, Mondays can be hard and it's normal to feel anxious or upset about it".

I think she just wanted her feelings spoken out loud, and to not be talked out of them. I will say, this past weekend my 5 year old napped both days and still got solid night sleep and went to school practically on cloud 9 today. Sleep is really restorative.

[Anonymous]

I did this myself off and on throughout elementary school. It was just separation anxiety after the weekend/vacation or even on days when something was different (i.e. early drop off). I’d just be understanding and sympathetic. “You’re feeling sad about going back to school. I understand—we had a lot of fun this weekend. I’m looking forward to seeing you after school to hear about all the fun you had with your teacher and friends.”

[Anonymous]

Don’t you sometimes feel less than enthused about going back to work on Monday? I mean I love my job but I like being home with my family better. Sunday night and Monday morning is hard for a lot of people. Kids have similar emotions.

[Anonymous]

I joke with my son that he must be so excited to go to school on Monday, or whatever day they are going back on, because school is so fun. He is 7 and has mastered the eye roll and "Mooooooooooommmm." Then I say "Yeah, it is more fun to be home and play games or with friends. Your Dad and I wish we didn't have to go to work on Monday's most of the time." We commiserate together and then find the things we like about school or work or the up coming week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DD is normally fine in the morning, but we had several weeks where Sunday nights at bedtime were pretty teary. I think it's just hard for these little kids! Kindergarten is HARD. And she knew the week would be long and tough and was feeling anxious about it. What helped my kid was to just acknowledge her feelings, without trying to talk her out of it. So I stopped trying to put a positive spin on things. So no saying "But you'll see Jenny and play and have gym class!". Instead I'd just say "yes, Mondays can be hard and it's normal to feel anxious or upset about it".

I think she just wanted her feelings spoken out loud, and to not be talked out of them. I will say, this past weekend my 5 year old napped both days and still got solid night sleep and went to school practically on cloud 9 today. Sleep is really restorative.

This is SO important. I have started doing this a lot more with my kids and I notice an immediate difference. Sometimes our feelings just need to be heard and validated.

[Anonymous]

We went through a phase like this early in the second semester of kindergarten with my DD too. She would especially be a mess on Sunday nights. I thought maybe something like bullying was happening at school, though my DD assured us that no one was being mean to her and could never articulate why she didn't want to go. I reached out to the counselor and her teachers, who said that this is pretty normal for kindergarten and that lots of kids kind of hit a wall at some point during the year. We just tried to give her lots of downtime in the evenings/weekend and make sure she got to bed at a reasonable hour. Long story short, after maybe a couple of months of this, my DD got through it and by the end of the year was saying how much she was going to miss her teachers over the summer.

TL;DR - this is normal. If your DD's teachers say she's not having any particular trouble, just be sympathetic and encouraging, make sure your DD is getting good sleep, and wait it out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DD is normally fine in the morning, but we had several weeks where Sunday nights at bedtime were pretty teary. I think it's just hard for these little kids! Kindergarten is HARD. And she knew the week would be long and tough and was feeling anxious about it. What helped my kid was to just acknowledge her feelings, without trying to talk her out of it. So I stopped trying to put a positive spin on things. So no saying "But you'll see Jenny and play and have gym class!". Instead I'd just say "yes, Mondays can be hard and it's normal to feel anxious or upset about it".

I think she just wanted her feelings spoken out loud, and to not be talked out of them. I will say, this past weekend my 5 year old napped both days and still got solid night sleep and went to school practically on cloud 9 today. Sleep is really restorative.

This is SO important. I have started doing this a lot more with my kids and I notice an immediate difference. Sometimes our feelings just need to be heard and validated.

Exactly. In fact, this applies to people of all ages, not just kids.

I've been thinking about this lately, how it seems like we're so desperate that our kids be happy all the time. It's understandable, but it's also so unrealistic.

And if a child isn't allowed to express their negative feelings, or they're told they're basically wrong for having them (because Kindergarten is so GREAT!) we're sending them a terrible message.