Would you leave your toddler home for older sibling’s party?

[Anonymous]

I have 2 elementary boys whose birthdays are coming up. Trying to book something for them but time will depend on whether we decide to bring their toddler sister. Boys are turning 9 and 11. Party will most likely be zava zone, archery, laser tag, paintball or escape room or some other activity geared towards upper elementary kids. All of these parties are age inappropriate for our 2yo.

DH thinks we should bring her. I’m afraid she will tantrum and want to participate and be at risk to get injured.

What would you do?

A. Bring the toddler
B. Book party during her naptime and leave her home with the nanny
C. Have one parent go first and other parent bring toddler when it is time to sing happy birthday

[Anonymous]

I would let the Nanny take the 2yo out to do something fun or do something fun with her at home like make and decorate cookies.
I would not take a 2yo to an older kids party like this unless I absolutely had to, its not fair on anyone.

[Anonymous]

I would (and have) left little one home for older son’s party at a jump place. She’s would have been miserable not participating.

[Anonymous]

2yo will not know that she is missing her siblings' party. Leave her with the nanny and have fun with your older boys. Have cake together after the party.

[Anonymous]

I would (and have in the same situation) leave her home. Focus on the older kids. Have cake including her at home.

[Anonymous]

I think your boys would actually really appreciate having YOU to themselves at their birthday party. Totally appropriate to leave her home and give you a break.

Have cake with her at home to celebrate.

[Anonymous]

My kids are 4.5 years apart and four times we left the little one with relative or sitter so that both parents could enjoy/help with our older kid's party. Before or after the kid party we celebrated as a family.

[Anonymous]

I have been in this situation. Leave home with the nanny. Everyone is happier, including your daughter.

[Anonymous]

Leave the little one at home. I have done this with zero complaints from the younger sibling(s). We also tend to have a family birthday celebration so the friend party is not the only chance to celebrate the sibling's birthday.

[Anonymous]

I see toddlers/preschoolers frequently at Zavazone, and I’ve taken 2-3 kids aged 2-4 at a time.

For the rest, I agree that it’s not appropriate.

What strikes me is the hypocrisy. Older sibling MUST be dragooned into helping at younger sibling’s party. But there’s nobody saying that a parent should bring something to occupy the younger child in this situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I see toddlers/preschoolers frequently at Zavazone, and I’ve taken 2-3 kids aged 2-4 at a time.

For the rest, I agree that it’s not appropriate.

What strikes me is the hypocrisy. Older sibling MUST be dragooned into helping at younger sibling’s party. But there’s nobody saying that a parent should bring something to occupy the younger child in this situation.

I think the issue is with the older child, there is concern over what priorities you are modeling for them (although FWIW I think it’s okay for an older child to occasionally skip a toddler party). But in the case of the toddler, it’s just about nap time/age appropriateness. The toddler won’t even realize they missed a party.

[Anonymous]

B

[Anonymous]

leave her home so you can focus on the party and not chasing a 2 yr old.

[Anonymous]

No. Immediate family attends birthday parties. We find something everyone can participate in.

[Anonymous]

C - except have the Nanny bring her so the parent doesn’t miss the party