If you have young kids do you spend Xmas at your own home or extended family/grandparents

[Anonymous]

I have lived abroad since graduating from college about 20 years ago. Now I’m about 2-3 hours from my parents and siblings. This will be our first Xmas close to family. My other siblings always take their kids to my parents a day or two early and open presents on Xmas morning etc at my parents instead of their own home. My elementary school aged kids are used opening gifts and playing with their toys at their own house and want to keep it this way. I would prefer it this way but my siblings are mad that we aren’t making an effort to be there on Xmas eve and day. The idea of packing up my kids and their presents, driving thru holiday traffic there and back and staying at my parents small and crowded house seems really exhausting. Hosting family at my home is not an option since my siblings prefer to be at my parents and their in-laws who live in the same town. How do other families handle this? I’m feeling guilty but don’t think what I’m going is out of the ordinary.

[Anonymous]

In your situation I would stay home on Christmas, but would be open to visiting sometime during your sister's visit.

We stay home every other year, and on alternate years we travel to the west coast and stay with grandparents. But, during our stay we may visit with relatives and open presents several days before or after Christmas. When we're at home, we see my SIL the weekend before Christmas. I think it's very normal (and a nice break) to have a quiet small Christmas on the actual day.

[Anonymous]

I feel like this is something I've known people to do when they are far but driving distance from family but that doesn't mean YOU have to do it.

Is a hotel room an option so at least you don't have to cram into your parent's small and crowded house? I'm not saying this is fair that you should have to pay for one but it sounds like you need at least that for your sanity. Or is staying at your house on Xmas eve and driving to them early on Xmas morning (will beat traffic too I presume) an option? That way you guys can do Xmas Eve just you and then Xmas day with the extended family? I would let the kids open my gifts on Xmas eve in that case - I wouldn't drag them all out to family home. If the kids want to bring their favorite newly opened toy with them that would be reasonable.

[Anonymous]

We leave the country for Christmas. We'll hit up the grandparents on our way out or back. We're flexible on which day gifts are opened.

[Anonymous]

We spend Christmas at our house. It is important enough to me to make this happen even if it got others upset. But you have to decide what is right for you.

[Anonymous]

Spend it with your family. My kids are 6 and 8 and have never had Christmas at their own home (which is beautiful and decorated etc). My parents passed and going to be with my husband's family is 100% worth it. We wont always have that choice and it gives the grandparents so much joy.

[Anonymous]

We always stay home for Christmas. Thanksgiving we are willing to travel for not for Xmas!

[Anonymous]

We see family on christmas eve and spend christmas at home. My chlidren opening presents under the tree at their own home trumps whatever extended family wants. They are only young once.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We see family on christmas eve and spend christmas at home. My chlidren opening presents under the tree at their own home trumps whatever extended family wants. They are only young once.

Same , but xmas eve is home as is xmas morning and we travel a day or two afterward for gifts and xmas lunch with the grands.

[Anonymous]

We have always done Christmas with my parents in their small house and would not change it for anything in the world. My dad dresses up as Santa (my kids are 6, 4 and 9 months), they wake up in the morning with so many people that love them, etc... this is our experience and our “tradition”, but if yours is different, I can see why you would not like to change it. I would be super sad doing Christmas without my parents...

[Anonymous]

My kids are teens now but when they were younger I opted for every 2-3 years we spend Christmas Day at our in-laws. My parents never traveled for Christmas when we were kids so I have great Christmas Day memories at home and wanted that relaxed Christmas Day for my kids where you can be in pajamas until noon.

I’ve found people balance Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve and Christmas Day between all the families. So for example when we go to in-laws, we try to go the same year my DH’s cousin’s wife is going to her family nearby. Christmas Eve is her family’s big celebration Day so they will come to my in-laws for Christmas dinner. With my BIL’s wife, Thanksgiving is her family’s big holiday so we see them for Christmas dinner and they will come down Christmas Day to see us and leave after dinner the years we host.

[Anonymous]

We do Christmas morning at our own home, but go over to see family later in the day and eat dinner there. But we always have the mornings to ourselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We do Christmas morning at our own home, but go over to see family later in the day and eat dinner there. But we always have the mornings to ourselves.

Same here. Home for the morning, travel in the afternoon

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We do Christmas morning at our own home, but go over to see family later in the day and eat dinner there. But we always have the mornings to ourselves.

Same here. Home for the morning, travel in the afternoon

I would do Xmas Eve/Xmas morning at home and go for Christmas dinner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We do Christmas morning at our own home, but go over to see family later in the day and eat dinner there. But we always have the mornings to ourselves.

Same here. Home for the morning, travel in the afternoon

Same. Open gifts at home and hit the road around 11:30-noon. Family is about 2-3 hours away so we get there about 2. Plenty of time to socialize, exchange gifts and eat. My kids are young and get up early so we aren’t rushed Christmas morning.