How do you make friends or have “unscheduled” play with no neighborhood kids? We’re considering a move to a house that has very older neighbors and NO kids. I know my kids will be fine (I grew up on a rural farm as an only child and, while I complained as a kid, it didn’t scar me) but my DH is really put off by it. |
There are no guarantees. There are plenty of kids near us, but my kids friends are all driving distance. The ones nearby aren't their friends (to weird, too nerdy, to much trouble...). They probably think the same of my kids! |
I have a neighbor friend that is my mom's age. She always did a ton of inviting - would ask me over for lunch, tea, wine, etc. She also didn't hesitate to ask me when she needed a favor, like water her plants when she went out of town. When we first moved in I was like how can I be friends with this older woman, but ten years down the road she is a true friend that I really value. Sadly, we probably would not be friends if she had not put so much effort in initially in trying to engage me.
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We live in a neighborhood like this and it's hard. There are very few kids in the neighborhood and those that are are nowhere near my child's age (mostly 10 years older).
So we don't have unscheduled playdates or any social life in the neighborhood. All playdates have to be scheduled and that is really tough, not for us but for other families. If I could do it all over again, I would not have chosen this family unfriendly neighborhood. |
We did this and it’s been devastating as our kids enter middle school, since it’s all about hanging out after school, arranged at bus stop when they get off. No parents involved. |
Let me guess, you relocated to Potomac or Great Falls? Bad move on your part -
Never live in an old folks home!!! |
Your grammar sucks and your kids sound mean. |
OP here - yep, considering Great Falls. Is it really that bad of an idea? |
You’re going to let one responder change your mind about moving to Great Falls or Potomac? Yikes. We live in neither place but happen to live in the neighborhood with mostly younger (preschool) or older children then my son 10). Yes, I’d like to have friends for him within the neighborhood and we’ve considered moving but, like another poster commented, there are no guarantees. So I Keep in contact with parents and ask for play dates. |
We just moved down the road to McLean from Alexandria. We have no immediate neighbors with kids my kids' ages. There are some kids in the neighborhood within a 3 block radius but we either don't click (both kids and parents) and/or they go to private school. I have one child who is super social and he is not lacking in play dates. His friends' parents will pick him and take him out. Friends can ride bus home with him after school. We go out to eat after activities and sports. He is not lacking in play dates. I have another child who is a homebody. He gets invited to occasional play dates and he goes. When he was younger, I would arrange play dates at our home but now he just prefers not. He has plenty of school friends and seems content not hanging out after school. I have one child in preschool and classmates scattered all over McLean and Arlington. We do at least 1-2 play dates per week, mostly my friends, not her classmates. There are some negatives to having too many neighborhood friends. They may come over TOO much. Kids may drift apart. Kids may feel left out. Parents may not get along. |
We live in a neighborhood with kids, but none of them are the same age/gender as mine. When they were in early elementary school that didn't matter too much...they'd all get off the bus and play outside for an hour or so in someone's yard until everyone went home for dinner/homework/activities. But by the time they hit later elementary that stopped. Mine are now in MS and HS and have no neighborhood friends and that's absolutely fine. They have no problem seeing friends at school, work (in the case of my oldest), activities, and at other times when they arrange get togethers if they want to. |
No, I’m simply curious of opinions of why it would be a bad idea. And appreciate the other side, too. |
My kids are doing okay with it. It would be better for yds if we were in a neighborhood with his friends but in his friend group, he is not the only one who isn't in one of those kid filled neighborhoods. Parents have been nice about inviting my ds and within 2 yrs the kids will be biking all over our town anyway so he will be fine. We chose magnet schools and we live on a street with mostly retirees. There are a few kids on our street but since our kids are at a magnet school, my kids don't go to school with them and so don't know them.
It has been fine. There tend to be young families moving in to the older neighborhoods. I was speaking to a woman in her 70s the other day who said that her street was all young families when they moved in many decades ago, and now there has been gradual turnover and the only older people are her/her husband, and two different neighbors. It is all young families now on her street! |
I posted this and I thought of more things. Now, because of how technology works, my teen doesn't live in the same neighborhood with his friends, but they are often on discourse chatting or playing together on minecraft. My yds doesn't live near his buddy but they facetime while they play video games together. It is like they are at the same house, but they are actually a couple of miles apart. |
I would not buy it. I think it is different from truly rural areas where most other kids at school are in similar neighborhoods, roads are safer (to bike down) and more freedom exists since they are safer areas generally. |