Settle this carpooling debate/question

[Anonymous]

You and some friends are going on a day trip (50-60 miles each way, more than an hour drive). There are 3 of you.

Person A: driving, and was going to go to this destination anyway, alone or with friends
Person B: lives about 4 miles out of the way, but is picked up by Person A
Person C: Lives 10 miles out of the way, but drives to Person B's place so there's just one pickup

Does Person B or Person C offer to pay for anything? Gas, lunch, etc... or nothing, since Person A was going to go anyway? Would it (or should it) bother person A if neither B/C made no offer for anything?

[Anonymous]

Of course they should offer. You always offer.

[Anonymous]

If I were person A I would never take money for gas..If I were B or C I might offer to get the tip at lunch or something small like that unless I thought that the cost of the trip might be struggle for person A then I would offer cash.

[Anonymous]

It’s not as black and white as that.

It’s a nice gesture to drive everyone. If I was A or B I’d offer to cover parking (if it was expensive) or pick up the tab at lunch, or treat for drinks. Just something to show appreciation. In my circles nobody would take money directly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s not as black and white as that.

It’s a nice gesture to drive everyone. If I was A or B I’d offer to cover parking (if it was expensive) or pick up the tab at lunch, or treat for drinks. Just something to show appreciation. In my circles nobody would take money directly.

This. If I was A, I’d never take gas money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not as black and white as that.

It’s a nice gesture to drive everyone. If I was A or B I’d offer to cover parking (if it was expensive) or pick up the tab at lunch, or treat for drinks. Just something to show appreciation. In my circles nobody would take money directly.

This. If I was A, I’d never take gas money.

Correct. But it should still be offered.

[Anonymous]

The question is less about what you accept, but what do you think about B/C not offering (drinks, lunch, gas, whatever).

[Anonymous]

I think it would be nice to offer but I wouldn’t accept gas money. But if we went out to lunch, it would be nice for B andC to pick up the check

[Anonymous]

You should provide gas money for the marginal extra cost of fuel for transporting i.e. more if you are chubby.

[Anonymous]

If they seemed appreciative it wouldn’t matter to me if they didn’t actually offer to pay for gas.

[Anonymous]

Is it friends? Everyone is middle class? If so, it’s insulting to offer gas money and no reasonable person would accept. The appropriate response is to offer to do the driving or done other task for the group next time.

[Anonymous]

You offer to pay for gas, the driver refuses.

Then you buy the driver lunch (or a snack or whatever) -- even over his/her protests.

[Anonymous]

You're talking about 4-5 gallons of gas--- that's like $10-12. Is that really notable to you? If you are strughling interns, then everybody throws in $3. If you are grown and professionals, then you don't quibble over $12.

If I'm A, I'm grateful for B and C's company. If you aren't grateful for their company, maybe that's why you would prefer some compensation. Do B and C wear you down?

[Anonymous]

I can’t even imagine this would come up in my circle of friends.