keep DC at preschool for nap?

[Anonymous]

My DC, 3, is on his third week of preschool, where he goes 5 days with a 1 pm pick up. I SAH with him and an infant. This summer, DC was napping 2 out of every 3 weekdays, which was mostly fine. His first week of preschool, he fell into a deep sleep every afternoon, which was great — I get a break, he wakes up refreshed. Last week and yesterday, he has not been able to nap after preschool— he will do 20-30 minutes of quiet time in his room, but then comes out and wants to play. DH and I have noticed on days when he doesn’t nap, that afternoon/evening and the following day he is cranky and more likely to tantrum. And I’m stressed because I’m riding the waves of his crankiness. So I’m thinking I might do a trial day at preschool, as I have seen other kids doing there, where DC stays later for a post-lunch nap, or rest, like some (most?) of his other 3 year old classmates, and do a 3:30 pick up. I’ve read here that the peer pressure can induce sleep. But I feel guilty about it, like ugh, shouldn’t I be able to handle him? But the truth is, I’m not doing a great job with it. I would say my interest in having him stay later is 60% thinking about myself, which is not incidental, and 40% thinking about the benefit of rest for him. without naps, he is getting 10 hours of sleep per night.

Can anyone, SAH or not, share whether they felt like their 3 year old benefitted from staying at preschool for the post-lunch nap? Thanks.

[Anonymous]

Sure try it if you want your kid going to bed at 9 or 10 at night. 3 is a perfectly normal age to drop the nap. Just put him to bed a bit earlier if you think he’s tired and didn’t nap.

[Anonymous]

I personally would rather have a 7pm bedtime than a nap.
So it depends on your late afternoon and evening schedule. If you are a family that has a later dinner and a later bedtime routine, then stick with the nap and do it at school. If you have the ability to do early dinner, bath etc then I would skip the nap and do that.
I think you either need to do a 7pm bedtime with no nap or a 930pm bedtime with a nap.

[Anonymous]

Thanks, this is helpful. DH gets home at 7, so my instinct is that we are more of a 9:30 bedtime family.

[Anonymous]

When he naps does he still go to bed reasonably well? If so, yes I'd think about it.

Or I'd find a way to help him nap at home. Sometimes sitting in the room can help them settle down.

I know people say this, but I think 3 is way too young to drop the nap. 4 maybe, but 3 year olds are active and need to recharge.

I will say that if he's staying up past 9pm with a nap I'd reconsider that stance.

[Anonymous]

I do not have enough experience to answer your question (DD is still 5 months), but why the guilt? As you mentioned, many parents find their kids nap better at school than at home. If that ends up being the case for your DC, and it works well with nighttime sleep and all, I say call it a win.

[Anonymous]

Maybe you should have him eat and nap at home. The two go hand in hand for us, it’s hard to eat, drive home and then nap.

[Anonymous]

Am in the same boat. But my dc gets scared when they turn out the lights at school for nap so I don’t know if it will help. One issue is they probably do play after nap and he might be mad if you pick him up when the kids go out to play.

[Anonymous]

My kid napped at school well until she was almost 5. Basically dropped a nap on weekends at home. I thought it was perfect— she was pretty cranky at the end of the day with no nap, and had no problem going to sleep at her regular bedtime with the nap (730-8). I would let him nap at school!

[Anonymous]

What time do you want him to go to sleep? My 3.5yo naps 1-2 hours at daycare from 1-3. On weekends, he sleeps from 2-4:30 or 5 (and would sleep longer if we let him). Usually in bed between 8:30 and 9. And asleep in 15-20 mins.

We like having a few hours on the weekends while he naps. And 8:30-9 bedtime works for us.

[Anonymous]

My son stays for nap time on the day I don’t go to work. Sometimes I keep him home with me but if I send him (I usually do), he stays for nap. Otherwise he misses lunch too, and it’s just hard to get anything done if he’s just there 9-11:30. It’s mostly for my benefit but he sleeps much better at school and it doesn’t affect his nighttime sleep.