If you were neglected or abused as a child

[Anonymous]

Whom have you told as an adult? What was their reaction?

[Anonymous]

I told my boyfriend in college and my DH.

Aside from that nobody else. I never talk about it and I shared with them more out of necessity than anything else. I hate, hate talking about it. I’m terrible talking with other people about their bad news too. I shut down and I don’t know what to say while my mind is racing and my anxiety goes through the roof.

[Anonymous]

My husband knows. My teenagers know. That's about it. I just don't talk about it very much. It's in the past. It doesn't matter too much for my day to day life.

[Anonymous]

For twenty years I told few people. Now I am less secretive about it. I disclose when I think it might help someone in some way.

[Anonymous]

I've told all of my significant others and some some of my friends. At Forest they don't believe me because I'm so well adjusted. But when they meet my parents, they are shocked.

[Anonymous]

My DH knows that my childhood was not a happy time, but I've never provided details or used the word abuse to describe it - I just can't do it. A few friends know I am long estranged from my mother, but again nothing more. I worry people will judge me or pity me.

[Anonymous]

The last person I can tell is my mom, since she was one of the abusers, but she would never admit it. Any conversation would result in her rationalizing it, lashing out at me, and thus making me mad at her.

[Anonymous]

Abused, neglected, ignored, bullied, I have seen it all. I have told my husband, but not all. I have told my daughters, but not all. Never told any friends. My friends would absolutely not believe I could have a background like the one I came from. I have risen above the dysfunctional my dysfunctional family of my childhood. I still feel sad inside for all I could have become if only someone took care of me.
I worked very hard to raise my daughters to be loved,respected, and educated. They are my golden prize for all of my suffering as a child.

[Anonymous]

I wrote a book about it -- under a pseudonym. If the issue (child sexual abuse) comes up, I express my thoughts. I disclose only if I feel it's necessary to make my point.

You'd be surprised how many people think abuse only happens in "certain" families. And how many people think you can't ever recover from it and live a normal life.

You can. I did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Abused, neglected, ignored, bullied, I have seen it all. I have told my husband, but not all. I have told my daughters, but not all. Never told any friends. My friends would absolutely not believe I could have a background like the one I came from. I have risen above the dysfunctional my dysfunctional family of my childhood. I still feel sad inside for all I could have become if only someone took care of me.
I worked very hard to raise my daughters to be loved,respected, and educated. They are my golden prize for all of my suffering as a child.

Same here except i’ve told me DH very little and my DDs basically nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Abused, neglected, ignored, bullied, I have seen it all. I have told my husband, but not all. I have told my daughters, but not all. Never told any friends. My friends would absolutely not believe I could have a background like the one I came from. I have risen above the dysfunctional my dysfunctional family of my childhood. I still feel sad inside for all I could have become if only someone took care of me.
I worked very hard to raise my daughters to be loved,respected, and educated. They are my golden prize for all of my suffering as a child.

This is me as well. I am successful but wonder how much more successful I could’ve been. Maybe I would not have had the same drive or been as resourceful with an easy life. Who knows. I often wonder what it feels like to have a mother. To be hugged by your mother. I have spent so many holidays and birthdays alone since I left home at 16, it’s nice to finally have a family. I get asked about my family a lot and lie. If I tell a part of the truth there are always more questions. It was more difficult when I was single and had to lie about being alone during the holidays.

[Anonymous]

I’ve told 2 ex boyfriends.I’ve never told one friend or even a family member.

[Anonymous]

Friends and family know the labels. The labels don’t begin to encapsulate the experiences. I think I would disclose labels fairly matter of faculty enough and leave it at that if I were directly asked (for some insane reason) or if I felt moved to for any other reason. I think that but am never asked because I work to insulate myself from others and do not establish new friendships or relationships, so I don’t really know how quick I would be to offer others that information.

[Anonymous]

In recent years I told a few of my closest friends. I just don’t want to feel I am hiding part of myself any more. DH knows. I don’t think I would feel close to him if he didn’t. It was a major part of my childhood.

[Anonymous]

I never told anyone not even my DH. Only my siblings know and we don't really know what happened to us individually. There is a lot of shame and trust issues I've carried my whole life. Telling someone would shame me and I wouldn't trust others not to gossip or judge me.