Does anyone on DCUM have rebellious teens?

[Anonymous]

On my 10 years on DCUM, I've noticed that there seems to be a lack of parents dealing with what I would term rebellious teens. And by rebellious, I don't mean liking to engage in debate with parents, or holding different political views, but the classic version of a rebellious teen - not academically inclined, smokes, parties a lot, etc, And the kid behaves in such behaviors not due to any sort of LD, ADHD, or psychiatric issue, but simply because they think it's more fun. There were plenty of teens like this when I was in HS, of which I was one myself but eventually grew out of. It just seems like I rarely see this classic version of a rebellious teen on here. And if a teen, does have some of these issues it's always due to some disorder. Doesn't anyone have a teen who is strong willed and just wants to have a good time?

[Anonymous]

You must be missing our threads, because we are here.

Life is not perfect, but we stay firm to consequences. My 17 year old is slowly learning, but he learns through mistakes, not through our example or our words. It's tiring, but I finally think a few things are sinking in.

[Anonymous]

I think this area is full of helicopter type parents who don't allow much if any free time. When teens are busy 24/7 with school, tutoring, sports, music lessons, after school clubs, etc, they don't have the time to get in trouble.

[Anonymous]

They’re getting into stuff and it’s all normal the parents just don’t know about it. Even the really busy kids, the athletes, the AP Kids most are doing “stuff” I’ve seen incredible naivete and denial here. I’m in Bethesda FWIW

[Anonymous]

My kid does stupid stuff. I don’t condone or make it easy but I don’t go crazy on consequences either. The natural ones are the best. So yeah that C in math might hurt his college admissions, but that’s on him. Not coming home on time, you’re staying in the next weekend. Having sex, well we hope you are smart and won’t suffer those natural consequences. It’s important to guide but not control at this age and let them make mistakes even if they might be big ones.

[Anonymous]

Seems like it's all I read on here, actually.

[Anonymous]

Yeah my kid learns best through mistakes too abd then he’s changing his behavior not us making him or trying to control him. It’s tough but some kids are definitely just like that.

[Anonymous]

I definitely have a strong willed, very independent seeking kid who wants to “live life” as he calls it. Doing the best I can to mitigate harm but he’s going to have to learn a lot through doing. We have good values and have demonstrated them , we have good communication with him which is a huge plus, so I think he’ll be ok in the long run. He seems to have a good sense of some limits. Sex but with condom. Pot but never drive or go to School high, etc.

[Anonymous]

You need to check in often. Plenty of this being posted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think this area is full of helicopter type parents who don't allow much if any free time. When teens are busy 24/7 with school, tutoring, sports, music lessons, after school clubs, etc, they don't have the time to get in trouble.

OP here. I think this is true. My own teen daughters are very busy and show no signs of becoming rebellious like their parents were. People put down the helicopter style of parenting, but it does seem like it keeps kids out of trouble.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think this area is full of helicopter type parents who don't allow much if any free time. When teens are busy 24/7 with school, tutoring, sports, music lessons, after school clubs, etc, they don't have the time to get in trouble.

OP here. I think this is true. My own teen daughters are very busy and show no signs of becoming rebellious like their parents were. People put down the helicopter style of parenting, but it does seem like it keeps kids out of trouble.

Until you are no longer in charge of them. I'm sure lots of these kids will head off to college and go wild. I'd rather have them do that now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think this area is full of helicopter type parents who don't allow much if any free time. When teens are busy 24/7 with school, tutoring, sports, music lessons, after school clubs, etc, they don't have the time to get in trouble.

OP here. I think this is true. My own teen daughters are very busy and show no signs of becoming rebellious like their parents were. People put down the helicopter style of parenting, but it does seem like it keeps kids out of trouble.

So you just come here to stare at us monkeys?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think this area is full of helicopter type parents who don't allow much if any free time. When teens are busy 24/7 with school, tutoring, sports, music lessons, after school clubs, etc, they don't have the time to get in trouble.

OP here. I think this is true. My own teen daughters are very busy and show no signs of becoming rebellious like their parents were. People put down the helicopter style of parenting, but it does seem like it keeps kids out of trouble.

Truly rebellious kids aren't being kept busy by their parents because they refuse to do the activities. If they are engaging in all these activities, then they are NOT being rebellious. You can't make them do any of that.

But I do see a lot of parents posting about rebellious kids here. Not sure how OP is missing all those posts. There's a 'what to do about pot smoking or vaping' post once a week.

[Anonymous]

Most parents ignore drug/alcohol use so its not rebelling here.

[Anonymous]

OP, I have one of those teens who is rebellious and wants to have a good time ("chill with my friends"). I've been on this board in DCUM only sporadicly. My son is graduating HS next week and the last 3 years with him have been very challenging. Sad to say, I am looking forward to him leaving my home yet I still don't know when & how that will be.