Swimming pool changing room

[Anonymous]

Is 3.5 year old boy too old to go into women's changing room at community indoor swimming pool if I solely take him there? Would there be little girls/big girls screaming if I take him there?
And, if DH decides to come with me, normally the boy of that age should go to men's changing room without question, right?
My boy is on the silly & immature side, does not know the difference between men/women or boy/girl body yet. I & DH never change clothing in front of him. What happens if he asks some questions afterwards? How do you handle it.

[Anonymous]

I have a four year old girl and I don’t think it’s too old.

Teach him about body parts- has he not learned that some people have a penis and others a vulva?

[Anonymous]

At our pool, kids are only required to use the “correct” bathroom at age 6. Before that people bring their kids with them to change no problem.

[Anonymous]

I still take my 5.5 year old into the women’s changing rooms. No one cares.

[Anonymous]

4 is too young to navigate a changing room alone. Bring him with you.

Along the same lines, he should know body parts by now. Tell him about the ways boys and girls look different and tell him about privacy and politeness. Tell him how he should behave in a changing room. You have the best motivation ever - the pool! - if he’s polite he gets to go to the pool, if he’s not, he doesn’t. Make it simple.

It’ll only be a big deal if the changing room becomes the first time he realizes girls look different than him. In that situation, of course he would stare, point, ask questions! He’s a kid! Don’t set him up to fail. It’s up to you if this turns out to be a huge embarrassing ordeal or just another day at the pool.

[Anonymous]

3.5 is definitely not too old for the women’s changing room with mom, although if dad comes and can take him to the men’s room that’s fine too. Just hustle him through quickly; also most pools have changing areas behind curtains or in stalls, so he really might not see much anyway.

[Anonymous]

No 3.5 is not too old.

[Anonymous]

If he asks a question after I would just answer it.

[Anonymous]

Yes, at 3.5 it is acceptable to bring him into the women's room. When my kids were little, our local pool (YMCA on the west coast) had a policy that beginning at age 4, opposite sex children could not go into the locker rooms. I thought that was extreme, especially considering this was in an area near a large military base and it was during the Iraq war, so lots of moms with little boys and no Dads around.

I do think, that if your husband (or other male relative) is around, he should take your son to the men's locker room. It does annoy me when I see a mom bringing her 12 year old son in the women's room and Dad is waiting outside.

[Anonymous]

If you are there with his dad, I'd send him to change with dad, but I think it's totally fine to have a boy that age in the women's change room (I only have girls). If it feels like a problem, you could just wear your suits under your clothes.

[Anonymous]

A 3.5 year old is absolutely fine. So is a 4.5 year old. And a 5.5 year old.

[Anonymous]

My daughter is 2.5 and is fully aware that she and mom have vulvas and dad and brother have penises. You should have that direct conversation with your son. I’m surprised you guys don’t ever change in front of him?

[Anonymous]

Is 8 too old to go into woman room?

[Anonymous]

I didn't think about this last week when DH and I split the kids up - I took 3 year old DD into the women's changing room, he took 6 year old DD into the mens changing room. What's the big deal? As PP noted, children know that men and women have differences. Our kids see us naked all the time, if they are with a parent, then I don't really care what changing room they go in. Our pool has stalled showers with changing areas, so no-one has to see the kid naked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is 8 too old to go into woman room?

8 is probably too old - the rec center pools say that starting at either 7 or 8 (I forget which one) the kids need to use their own gender changing room.