Only child struggling with aspects of raising siblings

[Anonymous]

DD: 6
DS: 2.75

I feel they have a pretty typical relationship from what I understand. They want a toy the other has, they try to force attention or affection from the other, and sometimes they get along beautifully and it’s super heartwarming. On the outside, probably even to them for the most part, I do a pretty good job parenting them. I encourage discussion when there’s a dispute (though sometimes one of them is beyond reason, usually my very dramatic DD), I rarely show the extent of anger when I feel it, and though the noise (of their arguing, or trying to get each other’s attention by hollering, or just chasing each other around the house at witching hour) makes me absolutely insane as I’m also an introvert, I try to let those things happen so long as they aren’t hurting each other. I realize some of the things that drive me nuts are also necessary ways for them to shed energy. But holy cow, in some of these moments, I feel like I’m going to lose my mind. I think it’s just a combination of not fully understanding sibling relationships at this point and being very introverted/energy-absorbing. For the record, I’ve read Siblings Without Rivalry and elements of it are great, but it doesn’t cover how to deal internally as much. Any tips?

[Anonymous]

Do you have a school counselor to talk to? Have you considered attending one of Dan Shapiro's workshops? There's one coming up on sibling issues next week.

[Anonymous]

Separate them. Have one color while the other helps with dinner. Have the older one read to you while the younger one helps with dinner.

Or, give them a task together to foster teamwork - have them set the table with napkins and silverware together.

[Anonymous]

Two words: Earbuds, Jazz.