I think DD broke up with her boyfriend

[Anonymous]

Her boyfriend is transgender (born a girl), and DD has never admitted to me that they are dating. But now I think they've broken up. She doesn't mention him anymore, except twice in the last two weeks to say "I haven't seen Jay/Jay and I haven't hung out."

Because she never admitted they were dating, I don't feel like I can address the breakup head-on. She doesn't really seem sad and is doing stuff with other friends, grades are stable, etc. But they were SO close for the last year and a half. Anything I can do for her?

[Anonymous]

Troll

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Her boyfriend is transgender (born a girl), and DD has never admitted to me that they are dating. But now I think they've broken up. She doesn't mention him anymore, except twice in the last two weeks to say "I haven't seen Jay/Jay and I haven't hung out."

Because she never admitted they were dating, I don't feel like I can address the breakup head-on. She doesn't really seem sad and is doing stuff with other friends, grades are stable, etc. But they were SO close for the last year and a half. Anything I can do for her?

Why are you making an issue out of this if she is fine? Let her be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Her boyfriend is transgender (born a girl), and DD has never admitted to me that they are dating. But now I think they've broken up. She doesn't mention him anymore, except twice in the last two weeks to say "I haven't seen Jay/Jay and I haven't hung out."

Because she never admitted they were dating, I don't feel like I can address the breakup head-on. She doesn't really seem sad and is doing stuff with other friends, grades are stable, etc. But they were SO close for the last year and a half. Anything I can do for her?

Why are you making an issue out of this if she is fine? Let her be.

I'm not. I just ... feel bad for her. This was her first relationship - seems like a big deal. But maybe I'm more sensitive than she is.

[Anonymous]

Troll. Someone on here has intentionally been posting a whole bunch of gender identity related posts trying to stir up conflict.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Troll. Someone on here has intentionally been posting a whole bunch of gender identity related posts trying to stir up conflict.

That's not me. If DD had been dating a ... I don't know how to say it - a full boy? - and broken up with him but not told me I'd be feeling the same way.

[Anonymous]

If she doesn't seem sad and has already moved on, what would you need to do for her? Sounds like she is just fine.

[Anonymous]

I would have been mortified for my mom to discuss my breakups with me. Just stop

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Troll. Someone on here has intentionally been posting a whole bunch of gender identity related posts trying to stir up conflict.

That's not me. If DD had been dating a ... I don't know how to say it - a full boy? - and broken up with him but not told me I'd be feeling the same way.

Cisboy. Short for "cisgender," which means someone whose sense of personal identity and gender matches their birth sex.

[Anonymous]

Hello! Who doesn't help their kids during a break up.

My son was so sad, it was adorable.

We went to the movies, ate popcorn, joked at how bad he was at being a boyfriend.

[Anonymous]

If she never told you they were dating, she's not going to talk to you about the break-up. Best you can do is ask about the relationship. Next time she mentioned not seeing him, you could ask "Were you guys more than friends? "

[Anonymous]

I think it's pretty sad that your daughter never told you they were even dating, if that's the case. Still, though, even the loss of a friendship can be painful for some. Maybe just try treating it like that and do whatever you would do if you found out any other person was no longer close.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Troll. Someone on here has intentionally been posting a whole bunch of gender identity related posts trying to stir up conflict.

That's not me. If DD had been dating a ... I don't know how to say it - a full boy? - and broken up with him but not told me I'd be feeling the same way.

Cisboy. Short for "cisgender," which means someone whose sense of personal identity and gender matches their birth sex.

Yes, thank you! I knew there had to be a word for what I meant!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it's pretty sad that your daughter never told you they were even dating, if that's the case. Still, though, even the loss of a friendship can be painful for some. Maybe just try treating it like that and do whatever you would do if you found out any other person was no longer close.

Yeah. We talk about most things, but I think she was worried I wouldn't approve (whether because of her age or his gender I don't know) so she didn't tell me. Though she's let me meet him a couple of times and he's perfectly sweet. I can see why she liked him.

I am probably projecting - she is less sensitive than I am.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have been mortified for my mom to discuss my breakups with me. Just stop

Really? When I was 16 and my BF broke up with me I was so heartbroken and was grateful for my mother’s support; I really needed to talk it through. But it’s different if OP’s DD never told her they were dating and doesn’t seem upset. I’m not getting the issue.