What are the rules (or sin) with regards to divorce?

[Anonymous]

I keep seeing the argument on other threads that divorced people are allowed to have leadership roles in churches, why aren't homosexual people? I don't know that answer, because I don't know the actual sin. What are the sin "rules" on divorce? Some choices:

It's a sin to divorce, period. So once you divorce you're always sinning forever and ever and ever?
It is a sin to divorce only if you remarry or have sex again. So you divorce, but you ask for forgiveness and as long as you don't get w/anyone else, you're good?
It is a sin to divorce and to remarry, but once you do and ask forgiveness, you're no longer sinning.

But all divorce sins are null and void if you were abused and/or a victim of adultery in your marriage?

I really have no idea what the divorce sin is, can you help?

[Anonymous]

http://www.vatican.va/archive/ccc_css/archive/catechism/p3s2c2a6.htm

Interpret this as you will.

[Anonymous]

Everyone sins; sins that would disqualify you from Church leadership would be something you refuse to admit is a sin or repent from.

I don’t think someone divorced and remarried should serve in Church leadership unless there was adultery. The Bible rules need to apply to everybody. I’m not even sure if someone estranged from their spouse should serve in leadership as Church leaders need to be models for everyone else.

My mother left my father and legally divorced. However, even though our priest offered her an annulment (my father was/is a terror), my mother refused and still considers herself “married” even though she has not seen my father in 20 years. She has never dated anyone since then. That’s her interpretation of the Bible!

[Anonymous]

^^^ That’s Catholicism. Protestant Christians have very different beliefs. However, I’m tired of these “Christians answer me this” trolls and I’m not going to bother typing out anything to feed into this latest “gotcha” game. I presume that’s why nobody else has answered, either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^^^ That’s Catholicism. Protestant Christians have very different beliefs. However, I’m tired of these “Christians answer me this” trolls and I’m not going to bother typing out anything to feed into this latest “gotcha” game. I presume that’s why nobody else has answered, either.

I am the pp above you and I am Eastern Orthodox and it doesn’t matter that it’s a gotcha question, it seems fair to me (and there is a lack of interest in these threads anyway). I mean, I also find it hypocritical that a Church would follow the Bible on homosexuality but not divorce. Either you follow the Bible or modern social mores.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^^^ That’s Catholicism. Protestant Christians have very different beliefs. However, I’m tired of these “Christians answer me this” trolls and I’m not going to bother typing out anything to feed into this latest “gotcha” game. I presume that’s why nobody else has answered, either.

The Bible is the Word of God, so there's no way to play a winning "Gotcha" game with it,

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^ That’s Catholicism. Protestant Christians have very different beliefs. However, I’m tired of these “Christians answer me this” trolls and I’m not going to bother typing out anything to feed into this latest “gotcha” game. I presume that’s why nobody else has answered, either.

I am the pp above you and I am Eastern Orthodox and it doesn’t matter that it’s a gotcha question, it seems fair to me (and there is a lack of interest in these threads anyway). I mean, I also find it hypocritical that a Church would follow the Bible on homosexuality but not divorce. Either you follow the Bible or modern social mores.

In the Orthodox Church, can divorced men be priests? I didn’t think so.

[Anonymous]

I'm the OP and a Christian; I should have clarified that in the OP. I grew up knowing "divorce" was a sin, but thought it had to do with once you'd slept with someone, you'd be committing adultery with anyone else. But, frankly, that sounds really silly as an adult, knowing that most people aren't virgins when they get married anyway. So each time I read this argument, I don't know how to reply, and no one ever seems to even acknowledge the question, which is why I posted, to learn and understand, myself.

(I do agree, though, there are lots of gotcha posts lately. I just try to answer with love and peaceful guidance, even though I know that person probably won't be swayed. I hope another person coming to Christ will appreciate kindness over snark though, so I hold my tongue.)

[Anonymous]

You have to specify denomination; otherwise your question is ridiculously vague.

[Anonymous]

It doesn't matter if you get a legal divorce. You are still married in the eyes of the Church.
So as long as you remain celibate outside of your marriage, you are not sinning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^ That’s Catholicism. Protestant Christians have very different beliefs. However, I’m tired of these “Christians answer me this” trolls and I’m not going to bother typing out anything to feed into this latest “gotcha” game. I presume that’s why nobody else has answered, either.

I am the pp above you and I am Eastern Orthodox and it doesn’t matter that it’s a gotcha question, it seems fair to me (and there is a lack of interest in these threads anyway). I mean, I also find it hypocritical that a Church would follow the Bible on homosexuality but not divorce. Either you follow the Bible or modern social mores.

In the Orthodox Church, can divorced men be priests? I didn’t think so.

Oh, absolutely not. In fact, if an unmarried man becomes a priest, he cannot get married unless he leaves the priesthood. Orthodox priests can get married but it must be before they are ordained. I have never understood why the Catholic Church does not do things the same way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm the OP and a Christian; I should have clarified that in the OP. I grew up knowing "divorce" was a sin, but thought it had to do with once you'd slept with someone, you'd be committing adultery with anyone else. But, frankly, that sounds really silly as an adult, knowing that most people aren't virgins when they get married anyway. So each time I read this argument, I don't know how to reply, and no one ever seems to even acknowledge the question, which is why I posted, to learn and understand, myself.

(I do agree, though, there are lots of gotcha posts lately. I just try to answer with love and peaceful guidance, even though I know that person probably won't be swayed. I hope another person coming to Christ will appreciate kindness over snark though, so I hold my tongue.)

It isn’t “silly,” it’s very simple: no sex outside of marriage. Doing otherwise is just as much of a sin as homosexual sex- in fact- it is the SAME sin. SMH.

[Anonymous]

I have a friend whose husband divorced her because she "got old." I seriously don't believe she sinned in any way. People age, that's the way God made us. There is a lot of unwanted divorce out there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone sins; sins that would disqualify you from Church leadership would be something you refuse to admit is a sin or repent from.

I don’t think someone divorced and remarried should serve in Church leadership unless there was adultery. The Bible rules need to apply to everybody. I’m not even sure if someone estranged from their spouse should serve in leadership as Church leaders need to be models for everyone else.

My mother left my father and legally divorced. However, even though our priest offered her an annulment (my father was/is a terror), my mother refused and still considers herself “married” even though she has not seen my father in 20 years. She has never dated anyone since then. That’s her interpretation of the Bible!

So someone who divorced because she or he was abused (but no adultery) should be prohibited from serving in church leadership, according to what you write here, PP.

You're OK with their divorcing an abusive spouse but would bar them from serving a church.

How would you explain that to an abuse victim who left an abuser and who also had a God-given gift for leadership? "Find a different outlet for serving God because your victimhood disqualifies you from certain forms of service"--?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone sins; sins that would disqualify you from Church leadership would be something you refuse to admit is a sin or repent from.

I don’t think someone divorced and remarried should serve in Church leadership unless there was adultery. The Bible rules need to apply to everybody. I’m not even sure if someone estranged from their spouse should serve in leadership as Church leaders need to be models for everyone else.

My mother left my father and legally divorced. However, even though our priest offered her an annulment (my father was/is a terror), my mother refused and still considers herself “married” even though she has not seen my father in 20 years. She has never dated anyone since then. That’s her interpretation of the Bible!

So someone who divorced because she or he was abused (but no adultery) should be prohibited from serving in church leadership, according to what you write here, PP.

You're OK with their divorcing an abusive spouse but would bar them from serving a church.

How would you explain that to an abuse victim who left an abuser and who also had a God-given gift for leadership? "Find a different outlet for serving God because your victimhood disqualifies you from certain forms of service"--?

I would rather hew closer to the Bible and historical precedent.

How do you know if someone has a "God-given gift for leadership?" What does that mean? I'm not sure what kind of situation you are talking about, or what kind of "leadership" position, or what kind of "abuse." My parents were in an abusive marriage- my father was worse but I saw for myself that both parties were abusive and did not handle things in a sane, "Christian" fashion.

Are you saying an abused person who leaves their spouse and re-marries should be allowed into Church leadership? Or someone who is just separated from their spouse? If the former, I would disagree with that. Possibly even the latter. It's a complicated situation, but no, I don't think someone in that scenario should be in Church leadership.

Mind you my own mother was in that situation but I think that often abusive relationships have a lot more going on than just one spouse beating down the other. I think it would be up to the priest/pastor and other leadership to determine, but I would hew closely to the Bible. You absolutely can find other ways to serve. It doesn't seem fair, and I know that, but I have noticed that once you start taking liberties with Biblical teaching or going your own way everything starts going in a bad direction. That's just my experience and discretion. I think there are a lot of policies in different churches.