DH isn’t an ambitious go-getter

[Anonymous]

I love my DH. He is kind and very nice. He loves me very much and I love him too but I have a hard time with him due to his lack of self motivation. He doesn’t have a plan or goals. He lets life happen to him. It drives me nuts and also hard for me to have respect for him.

I want a husband who is smart and put together and who can lead us through life.

What to do?

[Anonymous]

Time travel to 1952?

[Anonymous]

OP do you have plans or goals?

[Anonymous]

That was my first marriage. We divorced and I got a career and met someone who would support my career and never looked back. Be ambitious for yourself not for your spouse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That was my first marriage. We divorced and I got a career and met someone who would support my career and never looked back. Be ambitious for yourself not for your spouse.

Np. Did you have kids?

[Anonymous]

So...you had an arranged marriage, then? Didn't date? No period of engagement?

Got it.

[Anonymous]

Um. You married him sight unseen? Because unless you didn't know him at all ... This should not be a surprise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP do you have plans or goals?

Yes, OP’s plans and goals are for her husband to have a successful career and make lots of money.

[Anonymous]

Be glad you don't have my husband, who has been let go from all his jobs and now has founded a "start-up", which apparently involves doing even less work than before...

[Anonymous]

And he's changed since you got married?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That was my first marriage. We divorced and I got a career and met someone who would support my career and never looked back. Be ambitious for yourself not for your spouse.

Np. Did you have kids?

No kids. It was a sexless marriage.

[Anonymous]

OP, he got you without any ambition or goals...so what does that say about you?

[Anonymous]

OP, it doesn't sound like you have any goals or ambition either, besides waiting for a man to guide you through life.

[Anonymous]

You married this guy. You chose poorly. And now you're whining. Pathetic!

[Anonymous]

So was he an ambitious go-getter when you were dating? How is this a surprise??? People don't magically change once they get married. You fell in love with him for a reason and it clearly wasn't his ambition and career. Try to reconnect with that part of him. He must have some redeeming features and work on appreciating those. If you are comparing him to others, that is a very unhealthy thing for you to do and you might should get some therapy. You can never be happy if you live your life comparing your life to others.