Looking at High School for Asperger Girl

[Anonymous]

My daughter is a high functioning Aspie, with an exceptional IQ but almost no executive functioning skills. She also has a generalized anxiety disorder. She is doing very well academically in 8th grade at a top 5 private school in the area, but socially it has been challenging. She has lots of "friends" but no one that she considers as a close friend that she can confide in. She is truly struggling with finding her people. She is hoping to transfer to another private school or possibly to the local public (one of the Ws) for 9th grade. My husband and I are supportive of that, but not sure what direction to point her in. She would like a co-ed school that can challenge her academically but that wouldn't be a pressure-cooker for the anxiety.

Anyone with an Asperger's/high anxiety kid that can relate and have a thought on the best high school options?

[Anonymous]

Field.

Get her tutoring for EF skills. Try ivymount outreach for social skills.

[Anonymous]

Field is what jumped to my mind as well. Might try Burke too, just to assess another potential option that is sometimes listed. Also heard St Andrews can be friendly, but don't know anyone personally that could confirm.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Is there hope at some of the higher ranked schools as she gets older, considering her IQ is high enough that she can clearly handle the workload? Should the Potomac School, Maret, etc. be ruled out because of the anxiety? Are there any parents with Aspie kids at that level of school that have had positive experiences?

[Anonymous]

My aspie son totally melted down in a high pressure high school situation. I totally underestimated how difficult it would be for him to manage the workload (it hadn’t been a problem prior). His executive functioning totally broke down and he was not able to interact with his teachers to get help when he needed it. (And his strong perfectionist streak really did him in when his grades started dropping. He was an anxious, depressed mess.) Not to say that will happen for you but that was our experience. My DS is not a good communicator so we did not realize what was going on until things were very far gone.

[Anonymous]

Commonwealth Academy might work, but the HS is pretty small and it's not located near you.

[Anonymous]

Consider the Nora School in Silver Spring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My aspie son totally melted down in a high pressure high school situation. I totally underestimated how difficult it would be for him to manage the workload (it hadn’t been a problem prior). His executive functioning totally broke down and he was not able to interact with his teachers to get help when he needed it. (And his strong perfectionist streak really did him in when his grades started dropping. He was an anxious, depressed mess.) Not to say that will happen for you but that was our experience. My DS is not a good communicator so we did not realize what was going on until things were very far gone.

OP here. Thank you! This is such helpful information. Anyone else have positive or negative experiences with more rigorous schools?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is a high functioning Aspie, with an exceptional IQ but almost no executive functioning skills. She also has a generalized anxiety disorder. She is doing very well academically in 8th grade at a top 5 private school in the area, but socially it has been challenging. She has lots of "friends" but no one that she considers as a close friend that she can confide in. She is truly struggling with finding her people. She is hoping to transfer to another private school or possibly to the local public (one of the Ws) for 9th grade. My husband and I are supportive of that, but not sure what direction to point her in. She would like a co-ed school that can challenge her academically but that wouldn't be a pressure-cooker for the anxiety.

Anyone with an Asperger's/high anxiety kid that can relate and have a thought on the best high school options?

My dd with HFA ( not called Aspergers anymore due to the fact he was really horrible person) Read this: https://www.nytimes.com/2018/04/19/world/europe/hans-asperger-nazis.html


She went to Emerson prep when it was in Dupont circle. It moved to downtown dc https://www.emersonprep.org/

It is a great school that is very kind and supportive. Nora school in DTSS is another good school ( my other DD goes there) Also very supportive for HFA and not a pressure cooker.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Is your W public WJ by any chance?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is your W public WJ by any chance?

No. Whitman.

[Anonymous]

Good Counsel in Olney has the Ryken program and St. John's in DC has the Binelde program.

[Anonymous]

Whitman might work just because it is huge and there are a lot of kids/groups. Academically it will challenge her too.

If I were you, I would find a good academic fit first and then worry about the social piece because the social piece can vary very much by year and group at any school.

Also, with a very large school there is a chance that your DD will find a group to fit in. At a smaller school, you are pretty much stuck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Good Counsel in Olney has the Ryken program and St. John's in DC has the Binelde program.

Aren’t these programs for learning differences? OP’s DD does great academically without academic supports it sounds like.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whitman might work just because it is huge and there are a lot of kids/groups. Academically it will challenge her too.

If I were you, I would find a good academic fit first and then worry about the social piece because the social piece can vary very much by year and group at any school.

Also, with a very large school there is a chance that your DD will find a group to fit in. At a smaller school, you are pretty much stuck.

My niece with generalized anxiety disorder, poor executive functioning and ADHD did very well at her very large public high school and also had friends including a BFF.