Afraid of men
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Anonymous
| Let me start by saying I’m in I’ve had years of therapy after my divorce from an times physically and always mentally abusive man. I like men and I have male friends, but I’m scared of men in when it comes to intimate relationships. I’m happy and busy taking care of my young child and working full-time. I’m definitely not into women either. It’s not something that I ever talk about outside of therapy or even think about, it’s just that it does come up from time to time. This time it’s because I met a the new boyfriend of one of my female friends and he gave me the creeps despite coming across on surface as charming. Of course I didn’t say anything to her, and just smiled and chatted etc., but I instantly felt worried for her. Anyone other people have a fear of the opposite sex in terms of an intimate relationships? |
Anonymous
| Keep seeing your therapist. Seriously |
Anonymous
| My ex-wife was crazy, and now I'm afraid all women are crazy. My therapist says they're not all crazy, but then I read stuff like this post... |
Anonymous
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I was in an abusive relationship too OP, and had a lot of fear about intimidate relationships for a long time. I also always noticed when someone was dating a creep before they did - because I knew the warning signs and they didn’t.
I did meet a wonderful man who I’ve been dating for nearly a year now, and we have a great relationship. He’s so kind to me, was patient when we first started seeing each other, and there are zero red flags. He’s not possessive of me, he doesn’t get jealous, he’s helpful around my house but not judgemental, and he loves me and my son. Just give yourself time. You don’t have to be on a timeline to date, it took me 8 years. Focus on yourself and your child. |
Anonymous
So, you are afraid of women, in other words. |
Anonymous
| Men do a lot more damage from physical violence than women - both in terms of frequency and severity of the injuries. They often judge their manliness in terms of how violent they can be. (For example, a guy is proclaiming his manliness when he talks about his ability or intent to kick another guy's ass.) So, I'm a man who is more afraid of other men than I am of women. It has nothing to do with intimate relationships. |
Anonymous
| I think you need to figure out a way to talk with your friend about how you feel about her boyfriend. First, figure it out yourself. Find some concrete examples, so you understand why you feel like you feel. And then let your friend know you are always there for her, no matter what. So she knows she can come to you if the charm wears off and he is a creep. |
Anonymous
Why yes. Their craziness is a source of perceived danger and threat to me. |
Anonymous
| OP, are you afraid physically or mentally or both? |
Anonymous
Anyone who calls his ex-wife crazy is always a reliable, honest, charming man. And to respond to this here with this sentiment shows just how much class and character you have. OP, it's tough when you've been damaged. It's more so when you meet others and know they've had issues and their partners aren't great either. BUT, there are good men out there. Not many as PP demonstrates, but there are good men out there. You need to explore that. I don't know how to help you other than to say, trauma is real, and what you have might be PTSD, but that you also have a responsibility to heal. |
Anonymous
Double up your sessions |
Anonymous
It wasn't hyperbole. She was professionally diagnosed. But I guess only something like 25% of women are on medications for mental disorders, so not all women are crazy, right? |
Anonymous
Is crazy the professional diagnosis? And are the "like 25% of women on medication for mental disorders" also professionally diagnosed as crazy? If they hang out around men like you, I'm surprised the stats aren't higher. |
Anonymous
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OP now that I'm older and have been single, married etc. I would honestly say that many men have aggressive and/or controlling behavior. If you look at the wars and it's leaders over the years it's pretty self explanatory. While women can be all of those things the statistics tell otherwise. It's mostly men.
If you don't want to be with a man that's perfectly fine, but why continue to see a therapist for that. I'm afraid of snakes but don't pay a therapist for such nonsense. Anyone can live a perfectly happy normal life whether single, or married. |