is it normal for a 4.5 year old to have prolonged tantrums?

[Anonymous]

My child is still struggling with meltdowns, which could be 15-30 minutes of crying, screaming, flailing, and saying he hates everything and everyone. It's an older, more verbal version of the terrible twos- is this normal for a 4.5 year old?

[Anonymous]

Is he getting enough sleep, healthy food and a good balance of active play and unstructured down time? If not, fix those and see if that fixes the problem. If yes, I would talk to the pediatrician about a referral to work on emotional competency.

[Anonymous]

It was normal for one of my kids. He is pretty rigid and would get furious when things didn’t go his way. Hunger and exhaustion made it worse. Anxiety about an upcoming change was an even stronger predictor. He only did it at home - he could keep it together during school.

He is now 5.5 and so, so much better. Things got a lot better at five and have been steadily improving since.

Feel free to involve specialists if your spidey sense is tingling, but for us, he just needed time to mature.

[Anonymous]

My 4.5 year old does this sometimes. I'm thinking about getting him a therapist.

[Anonymous]

Possible anxiety.

But likely sleep deprived or eating too much sugar.

How is your parenting? Are you consistent?

[Anonymous]

DS, same age, does this occasionally too when he is overtired. He says he can’t stop crying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS, same age, does this occasionally too when he is overtired. He says he can’t stop crying.

This is my kid but hangry.

[Anonymous]

Ours does. It's often food (sugar, or not enough good food) but it's also when transitions are too abrupt. She is a perfect rule follower at school but comes home and dumps on us. Currently 5 but has been like this from the start.

[Anonymous]

We had that with one of our twins. She is more sensitive to being tired or hungry. I try to keep an eye on it, but sometimes you miss it. They are now 5.5 and we seem to be out of it.

[Anonymous]

Yes, one of my kids was like this. It was almost always tied to hunger and also used to happen more often when we were traveling and out of routine. The frequency, length, and intensity of the tantrums have diminished over time (kid is 7 now), but it still happens occasionally. Other kid doesn't do this.

[Anonymous]

3.5 and 5.5 were the worst for tantrums, but it depends on the child.

[Anonymous]

Get an eval for adhd

[Anonymous]

With all the post about how children behavior, it's hard to give suggestions. One would have to see and observe the interactions between child and adult first.

[Anonymous]

No.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Ours did but grew out of it. Let him mature. Teach him to name his emotions and talk about them to the extent possible.