Question: those who send their kids to slac or oos schools..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to highly ranked SLAC, which is now almost $80k all in and is stingy with merit, as top ranked SLACs can be. Pretty much everyone I know from my college is highly successful not just with our $300k+ jobs but have done really interesting things, seem mostly happy and motivated in all aspects of life. I want for my kids to have that life. Does spending $320,000 on my kids college guarantee that, of course not, but I cannot help myself to spend the money I have for that purpose. Maybe I am the sucker the schools are looking for and maybe my kids will not be able to get in anyway. But if they can, not making them turn down the likes of Boston College, Swarthmore, Vanderbilt. Completely respect that others think I am crazy, I might look back in 15 years and regret it.

That's interesting and I'm glad it worked out but I bet you'd be just as successful if you went state U. Seems like there are several philosophies...

* Go to the cheapest place you can that offers what you want
* Go to the highest ranked school you can get into/ or perceived best fit regardless of cost
* Go to a "good" school that won't break the bank

In my family, there has been no correlation between highly ranked schools and job satisfaction with the exception of the one family member that went to a highly ranked school but she scored a 1600 on the SAT. She probably would have done just as well as state U though. She had a free ride.

She only had a free ride at the highly-ranked school because of financial need. Highly-ranked schools do not (generally) give out merit scholarships to high performers.

Our OOS LAC choice was/is not about the "outcome"; it's about the experience itself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why exactly should I justify my consumption choices to a bunch of losers on DCUM?

I noticed some of these losers are pretty ambitious in life, despite, or because of their GED, HS degree, Podunk State University degree. I see some of these people moving up the ladder on their backs.

[Anonymous]

As a full pay parent of a kid at a SLAC, I will say that the cost really sucks and comes at significant consequence to our family, such as significantly reducing retirement savings, deferring needed home repairs, driving a 13 year old car that desperately needs to be replaced, limiting travel to visit my and our ability to care for them in the future, reducing and limiting extra-curricular activities for our other kids, limiting our college savings for our other kids, and significantly limiting our ability to financially help our college kid in the future. In other words, it really sucks.

We made this decision because our college kid smart and intellectually curious, but really struggled socially and emotionally in high school. I can tell you as a couple who went to ivy league schools, my kid's education is superior in almost every way (better rigor, interaction with faculty, course availability, course advising, student team work, etc.) to our experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a full pay parent of a kid at a SLAC, I will say that the cost really sucks and comes at significant consequence to our family, such as significantly reducing retirement savings, deferring needed home repairs, driving a 13 year old car that desperately needs to be replaced, limiting travel to visit my and our ability to care for them in the future, reducing and limiting extra-curricular activities for our other kids, limiting our college savings for our other kids, and significantly limiting our ability to financially help our college kid in the future. In other words, it really sucks.

We made this decision because our college kid smart and intellectually curious, but really struggled socially and emotionally in high school. I can tell you as a couple who went to ivy league schools, my kid's education is superior in almost every way (better rigor, interaction with faculty, course availability, course advising, student team work, etc.) to our experience.

Which SLAC is he at?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a full pay parent of a kid at a SLAC, I will say that the cost really sucks and comes at significant consequence to our family, such as significantly reducing retirement savings, deferring needed home repairs, driving a 13 year old car that desperately needs to be replaced, limiting travel to visit my and our ability to care for them in the future, reducing and limiting extra-curricular activities for our other kids, limiting our college savings for our other kids, and significantly limiting our ability to financially help our college kid in the future. In other words, it really sucks.

We made this decision because our college kid smart and intellectually curious, but really struggled socially and emotionally in high school. I can tell you as a couple who went to ivy league schools, my kid's education is superior in almost every way (better rigor, interaction with faculty, course availability, course advising, student team work, etc.) to our experience.

With all the sacrifices you make, I bet you know something many DCUMers don't know - the meaning of life. Life is not all about having $$$$$, fancy house, car, vacation, etc. When you realize that your kids are lucky to have great parents like you, you'll know it's all worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a full pay parent of a kid at a SLAC, I will say that the cost really sucks and comes at significant consequence to our family, such as significantly reducing retirement savings, deferring needed home repairs, driving a 13 year old car that desperately needs to be replaced, limiting travel to visit my and our ability to care for them in the future, reducing and limiting extra-curricular activities for our other kids, limiting our college savings for our other kids, and significantly limiting our ability to financially help our college kid in the future. In other words, it really sucks.

We made this decision because our college kid smart and intellectually curious, but really struggled socially and emotionally in high school. I can tell you as a couple who went to ivy league schools, my kid's education is superior in almost every way (better rigor, interaction with faculty, course availability, course advising, student team work, etc.) to our experience.

With all the sacrifices you make, I bet you know something many DCUMers don't know - the meaning of life. Life is not all about having $$$$$, fancy house, car, vacation, etc. When you realize that your kids are lucky to have great parents like you, you'll know it's all worth it.

The problem is this is only 4 years. If I thought sending my DD to a SLAC at $80K per year would result in lifelong happiness, we would do so in a heart beat. It won't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a full pay parent of a kid at a SLAC, I will say that the cost really sucks and comes at significant consequence to our family, such as significantly reducing retirement savings, deferring needed home repairs, driving a 13 year old car that desperately needs to be replaced, limiting travel to visit my and our ability to care for them in the future, reducing and limiting extra-curricular activities for our other kids, limiting our college savings for our other kids, and significantly limiting our ability to financially help our college kid in the future. In other words, it really sucks.

We made this decision because our college kid smart and intellectually curious, but really struggled socially and emotionally in high school. I can tell you as a couple who went to ivy league schools, my kid's education is superior in almost every way (better rigor, interaction with faculty, course availability, course advising, student team work, etc.) to our experience.

Will you be able to give your other kids the chance to go to a SLAC if they so desire?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a full pay parent of a kid at a SLAC, I will say that the cost really sucks and comes at significant consequence to our family, such as significantly reducing retirement savings, deferring needed home repairs, driving a 13 year old car that desperately needs to be replaced, limiting travel to visit my and our ability to care for them in the future, reducing and limiting extra-curricular activities for our other kids, limiting our college savings for our other kids, and significantly limiting our ability to financially help our college kid in the future. In other words, it really sucks.

We made this decision because our college kid smart and intellectually curious, but really struggled socially and emotionally in high school. I can tell you as a couple who went to ivy league schools, my kid's education is superior in almost every way (better rigor, interaction with faculty, course availability, course advising, student team work, etc.) to our experience.

With all the sacrifices you make, I bet you know something many DCUMers don't know - the meaning of life. Life is not all about having $$$$$, fancy house, car, vacation, etc. When you realize that your kids are lucky to have great parents like you, you'll know it's all worth it.

The problem is this is only 4 years. If I thought sending my DD to a SLAC at $80K per year would result in lifelong happiness, we would do so in a heart beat. It won't.

It’s not for everyone. It’s your choice, not right or wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a full pay parent of a kid at a SLAC, I will say that the cost really sucks and comes at significant consequence to our family, such as significantly reducing retirement savings, deferring needed home repairs, driving a 13 year old car that desperately needs to be replaced, limiting travel to visit my and our ability to care for them in the future, reducing and limiting extra-curricular activities for our other kids, limiting our college savings for our other kids, and significantly limiting our ability to financially help our college kid in the future. In other words, it really sucks.

We made this decision because our college kid smart and intellectually curious, but really struggled socially and emotionally in high school. I can tell you as a couple who went to ivy league schools, my kid's education is superior in almost every way (better rigor, interaction with faculty, course availability, course advising, student team work, etc.) to our experience.

With all the sacrifices you make, I bet you know something many DCUMers don't know - the meaning of life. Life is not all about having $$$$$, fancy house, car, vacation, etc. When you realize that your kids are lucky to have great parents like you, you'll know it's all worth it.

Yep. We are not targeting SLACs but top tier schools knowing fully well we can get the same education at, say, UVA (we might end up at UVA or even worse, who knows). It's the other intangibles - connections, quality of the experience and of course outcomes - that matter to us. Even if I didn't spend the money on college, it's not like I'm going to buy a fancier house, or new car (ours are 17 and 10 yo and we plan on driving it to the ground). We either give them money when we die or use it now for their education.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Save in 529, have cash, have kid do work study/get a job to help pay.

And again the question. How do families save enough money to pay for their kids to go to OOS colleges?

Maximize your earnings; Spend less than what you make; Live on one spouse's salary; Stay in the first house you buy; Own vehicles for at least 10 years, if not more; Prioritize your kid's education over vacations, etc. Luck plays a role obviously.. With getting the right job, spouse with the right mindset, kids that are smart enough to be able to get admissions to the right school and willing to take advice, etc.

Our first is applying for college now. His ED will cost us 80K+ a year; His safety will be $0 - $15K/yr (Merit aid); Instate (UVA) will be about $35K. Most likely will be around $50K/yr (OOS state flagship). If he makes his ED, it will end up costing us $120K more. We are OK with paying for what we believe is the best possible education for him. He has the stats for all these schools but has several structural factors working against him (race, competitive school, wrong sex for area of interest, etc.) so we hope for the best. Will deal with Grad school expenses when we get to that stage. Not going to Med school, so it won't be terrible.

Your kid is not getting into UVA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a full pay parent of a kid at a SLAC, I will say that the cost really sucks and comes at significant consequence to our family, such as significantly reducing retirement savings, deferring needed home repairs, driving a 13 year old car that desperately needs to be replaced, limiting travel to visit my and our ability to care for them in the future, reducing and limiting extra-curricular activities for our other kids, limiting our college savings for our other kids, and significantly limiting our ability to financially help our college kid in the future. In other words, it really sucks.

We made this decision because our college kid smart and intellectually curious, but really struggled socially and emotionally in high school. I can tell you as a couple who went to ivy league schools, my kid's education is superior in almost every way (better rigor, interaction with faculty, course availability, course advising, student team work, etc.) to our experience.

With all the sacrifices you make, I bet you know something many DCUMers don't know - the meaning of life. Life is not all about having $$$$$, fancy house, car, vacation, etc. When you realize that your kids are lucky to have great parents like you, you'll know it's all worth it.

Yep. We are not targeting SLACs but top tier schools knowing fully well we can get the same education at, say, UVA (we might end up at UVA or even worse, who knows). It's the other intangibles - connections, quality of the experience and of course outcomes - that matter to us. Even if I didn't spend the money on college, it's not like I'm going to buy a fancier house, or new car (ours are 17 and 10 yo and we plan on driving it to the ground). We either give them money when we die or use it now for their education.

SLACs are not the same as “top tier” UVA. That’s like saying an iPhone or Samsung smartphone is same as the top of the line rotary phone - they both do their same job of making and receiving phone calls. Unless you’ve used a smartphone, it’s hard to explain. Unless you or your kids have done SLACs, you wouldn’t know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Save in 529, have cash, have kid do work study/get a job to help pay.

And again the question. How do families save enough money to pay for their kids to go to OOS colleges?

Maximize your earnings; Spend less than what you make; Live on one spouse's salary; Stay in the first house you buy; Own vehicles for at least 10 years, if not more; Prioritize your kid's education over vacations, etc. Luck plays a role obviously.. With getting the right job, spouse with the right mindset, kids that are smart enough to be able to get admissions to the right school and willing to take advice, etc.

Our first is applying for college now. His ED will cost us 80K+ a year; His safety will be $0 - $15K/yr (Merit aid); Instate (UVA) will be about $35K. Most likely will be around $50K/yr (OOS state flagship). If he makes his ED, it will end up costing us $120K more. We are OK with paying for what we believe is the best possible education for him. He has the stats for all these schools but has several structural factors working against him (race, competitive school, wrong sex for area of interest, etc.) so we hope for the best. Will deal with Grad school expenses when we get to that stage. Not going to Med school, so it won't be terrible.

Your kid is not getting into UVA.

Says the high school dropout..

[Anonymous]

Full-pay family. If we lived in VA, maybe the decision to go out-of-state to a private would be more difficult, but MD publics? No thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you pay for slac? Or oos state schools? Like Michigan tuition is 50k out of state. My DS was accepted but we couldn’t justify the cost to attend Michigan when he could just go to UMD for a fraction of the cost. Just curious how do families pay for schools that are over 70k .

Do you have such little imagination that you can’t imagine that someone might think differently than you?

No need to be snarky here. Just wanted to understand other people’s perspective

Your responses (if you're OP) don't seem like you want to understand. You started by asking how we paid, but then you shifted into "How can you justify it?" which is a significantly different question.

I used to spend a lot of time on a travel forum, and one poster could not wrap her mind around the fact that some people would rather stay in an OKish hotel but really wanted their meals to be special. To her, what mattered was the special hotel. That's what gave her a sense of the place she was visiting. And I don't understand that at all, but I didn't try to tell her that she was wrong and expect her to justify her preferences.

Financially, the most sensible thing to do is to live in a small house, never remodel, drive beater cars, have no hobbies, take no vacations, shop at thrift stores/freecycle, live on potatoes, send your kids to whatever college is least expensive, and put all that money you're saving into index funds. Is that how you live?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you pay for slac? Or oos state schools? Like Michigan tuition is 50k out of state. My DS was accepted but we couldn’t justify the cost to attend Michigan when he could just go to UMD for a fraction of the cost. Just curious how do families pay for schools that are over 70k .

Do you have such little imagination that you can’t imagine that someone might think differently than you?

No need to be snarky here. Just wanted to understand other people’s perspective

Your responses (if you're OP) don't seem like you want to understand. You started by asking how we paid, but then you shifted into "How can you justify it?" which is a significantly different question.

I used to spend a lot of time on a travel forum, and one poster could not wrap her mind around the fact that some people would rather stay in an OKish hotel but really wanted their meals to be special. To her, what mattered was the special hotel. That's what gave her a sense of the place she was visiting. And I don't understand that at all, but I didn't try to tell her that she was wrong and expect her to justify her preferences.

Financially, the most sensible thing to do is to live in a small house, never remodel, drive beater cars, have no hobbies, take no vacations, shop at thrift stores/freecycle, live on potatoes, send your kids to whatever college is least expensive, and put all that money you're saving into index funds. Is that how you live?

+1

Financially, having kids is a huge mistake. ROI On kids is a huge negative number. They are resource sinks. Yet, most people will have kids, unless they want life to pass them.