Do you eat dinner with your toddlers/as a family?

[Anonymous]

We usually eat together at 6:30. Kids go upstairs at 7:00. Kids are 1 and 3.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We always ate together, always the same foods.

+1. I don't know anyone who does this who has out-of-the norm difficult picky eaters. Small issues, sure. But the ones with major issues are the ones who were always willing to offer different kid foods.

I'm the parent of two excellent eaters, and a disabled child with major feeding issues due to medical reasons. I also have worked with many families with children with developmental disabilities, which often impact feeding.

I think you are looking at correlation rather than causation. Families of kids with feeding issues end up making different choices about food than families of kids who don't have feeding issues. Families like mine, with kids in both categories, end up making different choices for different kids.

Now, sometimes, that shift to making different choices happens because a parents is worried about things that aren't actually a problem. For example, it is very normal for a child's weight gain and appetite to slow down when they move into the second year. But many parents don't know this, and respond to this change by helicoptering their child's eating. Similarly, it's normal for a child to develop and express strong preferences, including the preference for sweet and bland foods like fruit or carbs, as they get closer to two. But some parents worry that refusing a vegetable at 2 means that they'll never eat vegetables again.

However, there are also cases, where parents see things in their children that cause worry, and are dismissed as being overly anxious. I've worked with a number of families whose children struggled early on with feeding, and were later diagnosed with autism, or anxiety disorders, or food allergies that explained their strong reactions. In our case, I expressed anxiety about my kid's eating for months, and was told he wasn't eating because of my anxiety, only to find out that he has a life threatening heart condition that was both increasing his calorie needs, and making him too tired to eat.

Now, if you came into my house, you'd see that two of my kids eat what we eat, and one kid gets all sorts of special treatment when it comes to food. You might conclude that the special treatment causes his issues, but it's the other way around.

[Anonymous]

We (me, husband, and 18 month old) eat dinner together at 6. Toddler doesn’t always sit at the table for the full time, so when he signs that he is done, I let him run around while we finish. We start the bath at 6:45, get ready for bed, read, and lights out at 7:30.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just curious. Do you eat dinner with your small children or feed them, do bedtime, then cook for yourselves? I currently feed my 17 mo at 5, start bedtime at 6:30, then cook for me and my husband around 7. But thinking about doing dinner for everyone around 6 instead, before bedtime.

Just wondering what is common for people. Also realize it will likely change when another child or two enters the mix.

We did what you do OP. It wasn't about the "kid food" (we always served our kids the same foods we ate). It was about our kids needing an early dinner and bedtime.

[Anonymous]

We all eat a 5pm now.

We have 3 kids — bedtime isn’t over until 8:30pm. I’d be too hungry to start cooking and eat so late. Plus, it’s nice to eat together and it’s healthier not to eat super late.

[Anonymous]

I can't imagine eating so early