Anyone attend church only for social reasons?

[Anonymous]

All this fighting among Catholics...

Pick a more relaxed denomination op

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All this fighting among Catholics...

Pick a more relaxed denomination op

It's not among Catholics

[Anonymous]

https://www.jweekly.com/1999/01/29/shhh-it-s-national-you-will-remain-silent-in-shul-week/


Rabbi Joseph Telushkin tells a joke about an atheist who goes to synagogue every Saturday and sits next to his friend Ginsburg.

One day, someone asks the atheist why he keeps coming to services if he doesn't believe in God. He replies, "Ginsburg goes to shul to talk to God. I go to shul to talk to Ginsburg."

Of course WE believe that the people of Israel is something holy, so strengthening the social bonds among Jews IS a holy activity. And "life is with people" after all, nu?

Not sure if christians take this approach.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am very interested in starting to attend church for the social network and community that it brings, however I am an agnostic as is my husband. I'm not anti-religious, so I don't think it would be difficult for me to keep my agnostic views to myself, but I'm curious as to whether there are other many other people whose primary motivation for attending church is social, and just bite their tongues and play along when needed.

What do you think your kids will make of seeing you do this? I say this as someone who's all in favor of asking deep questions and wrestling with faith, but also as someone who's been a youth leader and has seen teens who know their parents are faking it. Not a pretty picture.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am very interested in starting to attend church for the social network and community that it brings, however I am an agnostic as is my husband. I'm not anti-religious, so I don't think it would be difficult for me to keep my agnostic views to myself, but I'm curious as to whether there are other many other people whose primary motivation for attending church is social, and just bite their tongues and play along when needed.

What do you think your kids will make of seeing you do this? I say this as someone who's all in favor of asking deep questions and wrestling with faith, but also as someone who's been a youth leader and has seen teens who know their parents are faking it. Not a pretty picture.

A lot of kids won't notice because they don't know Mom and Dad are faking it either. They might find out later, when they're older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:https://www.jweekly.com/1999/01/29/shhh-it-s-national-you-will-remain-silent-in-shul-week/


Rabbi Joseph Telushkin tells a joke about an atheist who goes to synagogue every Saturday and sits next to his friend Ginsburg.

One day, someone asks the atheist why he keeps coming to services if he doesn't believe in God. He replies, "Ginsburg goes to shul to talk to God. I go to shul to talk to Ginsburg."

Of course WE believe that the people of Israel is something holy, so strengthening the social bonds among Jews IS a holy activity. And "life is with people" after all, nu?

Not sure if christians take this approach.

Christians do it too, but not always so openly, although I do know of open agnostics in liberal Christian (but not RC) churches.

In some churches the pastor makes it clear from the pulpit that all people are welcome regardless of "what they believe or don't believe."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am very interested in starting to attend church for the social network and community that it brings, however I am an agnostic as is my husband. I'm not anti-religious, so I don't think it would be difficult for me to keep my agnostic views to myself, but I'm curious as to whether there are other many other people whose primary motivation for attending church is social, and just bite their tongues and play along when needed.

I personally don't know anyone who goes to church for social networking. But if I would be you, I would consider going as a learning experience first. Tell yourself/your kids that you are going to church to learn about God (even if you don't believe in him). It like attending NASA lectures, or lectures on UFO. You don't believe it those things, but you are going there to learn. You may leave with changing your believes in UFO, or may not. You may find a group of likeminded people who will form your social circle later.

But I agree with the poster who was a youth leader: if you are open about your believes and continue going to church just to socialize with people without being open to their believes, you kids will view you as a faker.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am very interested in starting to attend church for the social network and community that it brings, however I am an agnostic as is my husband. I'm not anti-religious, so I don't think it would be difficult for me to keep my agnostic views to myself, but I'm curious as to whether there are other many other people whose primary motivation for attending church is social, and just bite their tongues and play along when needed.

I personally don't know anyone who goes to church for social networking. But if I would be you, I would consider going as a learning experience first. Tell yourself/your kids that you are going to church to learn about God (even if you don't believe in him). It like attending NASA lectures, or lectures on UFO. You don't believe it those things, but you are going there to learn. You may leave with changing your believes in UFO, or may not. You may find a group of likeminded people who will form your social circle later.

But I agree with the poster who was a youth leader: if you are open about your believes and continue going to church just to socialize with people without being open to their believes, you kids will view you as a faker.

Except at some liberal churches, there are a lot of people who are open about their lack of belief -- as well as their support for the good that the church does.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am very interested in starting to attend church for the social network and community that it brings, however I am an agnostic as is my husband. I'm not anti-religious, so I don't think it would be difficult for me to keep my agnostic views to myself, but I'm curious as to whether there are other many other people whose primary motivation for attending church is social, and just bite their tongues and play along when needed.

I personally don't know anyone who goes to church for social networking. But if I would be you, I would consider going as a learning experience first. Tell yourself/your kids that you are going to church to learn about God (even if you don't believe in him). It like attending NASA lectures, or lectures on UFO. You don't believe it those things, but you are going there to learn. You may leave with changing your believes in UFO, or may not. You may find a group of likeminded people who will form your social circle later.

But I agree with the poster who was a youth leader: if you are open about your believes and continue going to church just to socialize with people without being open to their believes, you kids will view you as a faker.

Except at some liberal churches, there are a lot of people who are open about their lack of belief -- as well as their support for the good that the church does.

I'm the youth leader quoted above and I am completely open about my questioning. I'm not alone in this respect at all. That said, though, OP says nothing about the church as a force for good and love in the world. She says nothing about trying to understand and grapple with questions about faith. She just declares herself agnostic and in search of a social network. She would be welcome to come to church, sure, but, in my experience, you only get out of it what you put in.

[Anonymous]

OP, you’re welcome to come to Catholic Church and get involved. Do RCIA. Even if you don’t go through with confirmation, you will meet other adults in a small group environment and they will become your friends. No one will pressure you to officially join. It’s up to you. One guy in my parish did RCIA on and off for years before actually getting confirmed. Ignore the anti-Catholic nonsense on dcurbanmom. Just go to mass and see for yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you’re welcome to come to Catholic Church and get involved. Do RCIA. Even if you don’t go through with confirmation, you will meet other adults in a small group environment and they will become your friends. No one will pressure you to officially join. It’s up to you. One guy in my parish did RCIA on and off for years before actually getting confirmed. Ignore the anti-Catholic nonsense on dcurbanmom. Just go to mass and see for yourself.

All of the above may be true, but I bet if OP reveals that she's agnostic there will be major attempts in any Catholic church to encourage her to believe in God. That's much less likely in an Episcopal chruch.

[Anonymous]

People looking for a social life have many choices these days. Meetups, social media, bicycling or bird watching clubs, golfing, bars, heck, the other parents at your kids’ soccer games or schools.

This is such a dumb question. There’s no reason to go to church for a social life these days, unless you live in a one-church, one-stoplight town.

Which makes non-believers at church different from OP’s (weirdly hopeful) assumption that they’re there to socialize.

Non-believers at church are there, as others have said, to give their kids an opportunity to explore religion, or to learn and explore their own disbelief (sorry OP, that probably wasn’t what you were hoping to hear). Not to socialize.

[Anonymous]

I go to my synagogue because it makes my mother happy to see me there. I drag my daughter and husband (both atheists) who come for the food and some of the music.
"How good and pleasing it is for people to sit together." Psalms 133:1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you’re welcome to come to Catholic Church and get involved. Do RCIA. Even if you don’t go through with confirmation, you will meet other adults in a small group environment and they will become your friends. No one will pressure you to officially join. It’s up to you. One guy in my parish did RCIA on and off for years before actually getting confirmed. Ignore the anti-Catholic nonsense on dcurbanmom. Just go to mass and see for yourself.

All of the above may be true, but I bet if OP reveals that she's agnostic there will be major attempts in any Catholic church to encourage her to believe in God. That's much less likely in an Episcopal chruch.

This entirely depends on who she reveals it to. Catholic Churches are pretty homogeneous groups of people.
If she revealed it to a priest, she would probably find herself in an intellectual discussion where he shares his own doubts. If she shared it with most parents of school aged kids, they would probably not find that information particularly interesting and change the subject. Some more devout may tell her how that belief has been important in their own lives. If she raised it in RCIA, she may find herself in a heated. but good natured, argument. If she raised it with the group of older women who go to 6am mass daily and meet afterward to pray the rosary, one or two might try to get her to believe, but most would probably tell her that it was fine and she was invited to pray with them anyway.

Most Catholics aren’t particularly great evangelizers. It just isn’t a big part of Catholicism.

[Anonymous]

I am catholic and have several close friends who are Mormon. I have attended many many social functions, baptisms, baby showers, and services at their church without ever implying that I might join. I don’t see why you wouldn’t be able to do something similar as an agnostic.