Private school for half the cost, would you do it?

[Anonymous]

It seems like you've already made up your mind about private and are just seeking validation of your choice, which is fine. I agree with others that only considering Sidwell and Beauvoir is risky. I don't know the acceptance rates but can only guess they are pretty low. Cast a wider net. Feedback in the form of stories from friends (or this Board) will only get you so far.

[Anonymous]

About class size, you have said a few times that small class size is best. The question is best for what and for whom? Because like most things this in not a universal truth.

Better academically? Maybe, maybe not.
For example, a academic outlier in a small class with no true academic peers is not in the best place. A bigger class with a wider range of kids might be best so that the kid has academic peers (I know several people who turned down Beauvior for this reason). On the other hand, a kid with academic challenges would likely do better with a small class to get more attention, unless the attention that kid needs is from a special educator and the private school does not have the expertise. Most kids in the middle will do fine in either, and scales tip to small class.

Better socially? For some yes, for others not at all.
If your kid fits in perfectly and has all the right stuff, then small is fine. If your kid needs a bigger group from which to find friends, bigger is better. If your kid is very different in some way and needs adult protection from mean behavior, small can help with that (then again, some public schools are better for this because they handle "different" on a daily basis and the kids are totally used to all kinds of peers).

Better for extras? Sometimes yes, sometimes no.
Yes, if the school has what you want and with a small group there is a better chance you will get to do it. No if the school is too small to have the things your child might like to do.

In all of these things there are trade offs. It is a lot to consider. Best of luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:About class size, you have said a few times that small class size is best. The question is best for what and for whom? Because like most things this in not a universal truth.

Better academically? Maybe, maybe not.
For example, a academic outlier in a small class with no true academic peers is not in the best place. A bigger class with a wider range of kids might be best so that the kid has academic peers (I know several people who turned down Beauvior for this reason). On the other hand, a kid with academic challenges would likely do better with a small class to get more attention, unless the attention that kid needs is from a special educator and the private school does not have the expertise. Most kids in the middle will do fine in either, and scales tip to small class.

Better socially? For some yes, for others not at all.
If your kid fits in perfectly and has all the right stuff, then small is fine. If your kid needs a bigger group from which to find friends, bigger is better. If your kid is very different in some way and needs adult protection from mean behavior, small can help with that (then again, some public schools are better for this because they handle "different" on a daily basis and the kids are totally used to all kinds of peers).

Better for extras? Sometimes yes, sometimes no.
Yes, if the school has what you want and with a small group there is a better chance you will get to do it. No if the school is too small to have the things your child might like to do.

In all of these things there are trade offs. It is a lot to consider. Best of luck.

This PP is way too reasonable for DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Personally, I would never pay $40K a year for something I could get for free. In my mind that is just crazy and is throwing money away.

Do you really, really think that some private school will educate your kids so much better--$40K better--than a perfectly good public school like Murch? The kids are not learning something esoteric like nuclear physics. Learning to read and write and do math, assuming you come from an educated family that is providing all the kinds of at-home support that educated families do, is pretty much the same everywhere. What would, exactly, they be getting for that $40K?

If you can afford to move in-bounds to a decent NW public school, do that and save your money for retirement. Or give it away. Or use the money to give your kids highly, enriching summer experiences. Adding up year after year, that is a shitload of money.

I am a highly educated person and I have my kids in a decent, free, public charter school here in DC. We go play in Beauvoir's lovely playground on the weekends. For free. I am saving money for my kids' college educations and my retirement.

OP here. We would be paying half of what other people pay so, as of now, it’s a little less than 20k. We can afford to move to a better school district. The way i see it, in private school my khusband DS will get a lot more attention, but not necessarily better teachers. At 6 years old I am not sure we need teachers with PhDs, butbhaving half of the kids per class should make a big difference, right?

Then you might want to rethink Beauvoir. School is large and some kids slip through the cracks when it comes to third grade outplacement. (More than 80 graduate each year, many competing for the same spots.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:About class size, you have said a few times that small class size is best. The question is best for what and for whom? Because like most things this in not a universal truth.

Better academically? Maybe, maybe not.
For example, a academic outlier in a small class with no true academic peers is not in the best place. A bigger class with a wider range of kids might be best so that the kid has academic peers (I know several people who turned down Beauvior for this reason). On the other hand, a kid with academic challenges would likely do better with a small class to get more attention, unless the attention that kid needs is from a special educator and the private school does not have the expertise. Most kids in the middle will do fine in either, and scales tip to small class.

Better socially? For some yes, for others not at all.
If your kid fits in perfectly and has all the right stuff, then small is fine. If your kid needs a bigger group from which to find friends, bigger is better. If your kid is very different in some way and needs adult protection from mean behavior, small can help with that (then again, some public schools are better for this because they handle "different" on a daily basis and the kids are totally used to all kinds of peers).

Better for extras? Sometimes yes, sometimes no.
Yes, if the school has what you want and with a small group there is a better chance you will get to do it. No if the school is too small to have the things your child might like to do.

In all of these things there are trade offs. It is a lot to consider. Best of luck.

Op here. In my case I am only considering elementary school where I am pretty sure, having more attention from a teacher is more important than firing your own group of friends. All kids at this age are very similar... at least this is my I pression

[Anonymous]

OP, I am a European WB-er, although single Mom of two, so private or public is not even a question for me. I think it boiils down to what form of education you believe in, and what you think would be the best fit for your kids and your family. Visit a bunch of different schools and go with your gut feeling. My two kids are at H. Mann ES. We specifically bought and moved , so the kids can attend that school, since it has a v. good reputation. People also love Stoddert and Janney. For Middle and High School, we might move to Bethesda though, unless Hardy becomes a great school. We will move so my kids can attend great public schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:P.S. I have friends who have invited me to their kids' functions at Beauvoir/National Cathedral School, and school events are held....in the cathedral. I mean, that is not a remotely normal American experience. When I was growing up, school events were held in the auditorium that doubled as a gymnasium where we had gym class. And it was perfectly fine.

Look if you are not comfortable with how much money Americans spend on stuff, then why send your kids to a school where they will be hanging around with families that have HUGE amounts of extra income and spend lavishly and think that is normal?

Agree. I think this is more of a class discussion than anything. Do you want to be part of/have your kids be part of the upper class? Do you want to meet those people daily? Do you want your kids to have expensive tastes?

I grew up decidedly middle class (not "DC middle class") and I'm so glad I have Toyota tastes not BMW tastes, because it means we have more money for other things that are not material, and we do those cheaply too. I am hoping my kids do not grow up thinking money is everything. And that's maybe what you're in for when your kids are aware they are rich, their entire lives. I realize if you actually do have money and "pretend" you don't that's kind of obnoxious also, I don't think we're in that category though. But, I was brought up to think working class values are better than upper class values. Maybe that's another form of snobbery but it's why I'd never go private unless we lived someplace that didn't have any good schools at all. DC does.

OP here. This is really NOT a class discussion at all. I want my kids to be in the best education environment we can afford. If that means that they will be surrounded by the richest kids in DC so be it, but I would never purposefully enroll my kids in a school because they will be able to be surrounded by rich kids. I have nothing against any type of class or richness levels. If what’s best for my kids is small class size (as I suspect especially for the elementary school years) and we can afford it, then that is what I want for them. I am comfortable rubbing elbows with the richest and poorest people in DC as long as they care about their kids’ education.

I think you are really not giving enough thought to the question of fit with the school community. There is more to the school than the # of kids in a class. For your reference, our friends who are a Bank/Fund couple could have sent their children to Beauvoir, but decided against it after they sat in a couple of parent functions. They could not see themselves fit with the people they saw around. And this couple has a higher HHI than you.

OP here. I am sure all schools in NW DC are full of international, very educated, but not so rich people. Why would we not fit in? In our current preschool there are many families that will end up at Beauvoir or similar places and we all get along really well. Are you saying that unless you are very wealthy, Protestant and from and old American family you won’t fit in? I am sure you are wrong.

All public schools in upper NW DC are full of the people you describe, but private schools in NW DC are full of rich people. And when I say rich, I mean they have budgets where they don't have to poll an internet board on whether they can afford to pay full freight for multiple kids at Beauvoir.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:About class size, you have said a few times that small class size is best. The question is best for what and for whom? Because like most things this in not a universal truth.

Better academically? Maybe, maybe not.
For example, a academic outlier in a small class with no true academic peers is not in the best place. A bigger class with a wider range of kids might be best so that the kid has academic peers (I know several people who turned down Beauvior for this reason). On the other hand, a kid with academic challenges would likely do better with a small class to get more attention, unless the attention that kid needs is from a special educator and the private school does not have the expertise. Most kids in the middle will do fine in either, and scales tip to small class.

Better socially? For some yes, for others not at all.
If your kid fits in perfectly and has all the right stuff, then small is fine. If your kid needs a bigger group from which to find friends, bigger is better. If your kid is very different in some way and needs adult protection from mean behavior, small can help with that (then again, some public schools are better for this because they handle "different" on a daily basis and the kids are totally used to all kinds of peers).

Better for extras? Sometimes yes, sometimes no.
Yes, if the school has what you want and with a small group there is a better chance you will get to do it. No if the school is too small to have the things your child might like to do.

In all of these things there are trade offs. It is a lot to consider. Best of luck.

Op here. In my case I am only considering elementary school where I am pretty sure, having more attention from a teacher is more important than firing your own group of friends. All kids at this age are very similar... at least this is my I pression

I was talking about elementary school in my comments. First, kids at this age are not similar unless you are purposely selecting for a group of similar kids (and even then, you will have problems because human nature makes a kid need to distinguish themselves somehow, so they hyperfocus on really minute differences, which is generally unhealthy). Also, mean girl behavior and culling the pack generally starts in PK for girls and 2nd grade for boys, so finding peers matters early too. Second, kids are academically different at any age. Some kids do not need and get no extra benefit from more attention; others really do need it (and a friend at B. told me they put an advanced kid in the hallway to do different work, so that kid gets less attention; another told us S. will strongly suggest that you get a tutor if your kid shows any academic need at all, so again, not getting needed attention in class). So, not all kids are the same, and what is best can depend on the kid, even in preschool, and certainly in elementary school.

But seriously, if you get into B or S, you will be happy, so go for it. Every school has its bumps, but friends whose kids attended each really like the schools overall and are happy with their decisions; same with friends who chose the public schools you are considering. I think what you want to realize in making your choice is that you don't have to say you are making the choice because it is so much better than the alternatives -- that is never really the case, nor is it necessary. You will likely have a good experience either way, but you've got a bargain on your hands, so why not? There is no need to do mental gymnastics to justify it.

[Anonymous]

Another WB staff here- but no education benefits. We chose Oyster- where there are many international families and incomes across multiple levels. Personally we like that DC interacts with kids across socioeconomic spectrum and with diverse interests. At this age, would save money for retirement and college education rather than elementary. Our class size is 21/22, and there are two teachers in English, two teachers in Spanish. Pull out support for learning. Positive experience overall!

[Anonymous]

You seem determined to do it. You cast aside arguments against the idea.

I think that if you or a spouse loses your job, you will be sorry to have your kid in a school that costs thousands and thousands a year.

I also think you are really underestimating the degree of wealth you will encounter in those schools (families that think nothing of spending 60K+ a year to educate two children) and your kids will grow up thinking what the majority of their classmates have is the norm.

[Anonymous]

My son's grandmother paid for private school for two kids from K-12th in DC. She has never seen a school as amazing as Marie Reed. She knows its Title I; she knows its minority majority; she knows its "urban" and every time she is floored by the amazing building, services; classes. 24 years of private school and her kids didn't get that.

You are missing out on Marie Reed is that is a non starter for you. And the Marie Reed community is safe from you now too.

BTW I went to a private DC school myself; a lot of DC prep school kids came out of Maire Reed.

[Anonymous]

Whoa, why the sanctimony about MR if you went to private school yourself?

It’s okay for folks to make different decisions than you.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I thought this post was dead! I have nothing against Marie Reed and I agree that the new buinding is amazing. However, we all base our beliefs on what we hear and see for ourselves. We had friends who had a horrible experience there (not because of teachers or because of the amenities) and I visited the school myself. I am sorry if this hurts your feelings, but I was not impressed and that is one big reason why we are moving. This school might be great, but it’s just not a good fit for our family.

[Anonymous]

Is that $19K coming to you as cash or directly to the school? In other words, do you have to pay tax on it?