I regret not going to med school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am also married to doctor, he did a surgical residency than a two year fellowship. Unlike pp dr's wife, I'd encourage you to follow your dream. yes, it was be an hour intensive (but no where close to what it was like before the mandated hours restrictions for residency), but I have seen my husband's peers who are women and younger residents and fellows complete their training and have children. Once the training is complete, many of the woman surgeons and medical doctors I know are able to work p/t schedules that I'm completely envious of, and can't think of a single other professional occupation which comes close in terms of flexibility. Go for it!

Perhaps you are referring to me when you refer to the pp dr's wife. We know plenty of female surgeons. Best case scenario, OP will finish med school at 35 and will start residency then. You don't know what you are talking about if you think OP will be able to have kids during surgical residency.

Ok, I'll be sure to tell that to my friends that had kids during their surgical,residency.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP here. Thank you to everyone who posted. My dh has been considering med school but would need two years of science in the evening classes prior to sitting the mcat. Then a year of applying before starting so we too are looking at a long road. We have 1 child and 1 on the way in the fall. I love the idea of. A large family but don't know how realistic it would be to continue on in the baby preschool years as basically a single parent. For those that went through medachool or had a spouse do it with young children was it doable? Was medschool harder or residency? I Was thinking if we could be done with babies by residency it might not kill me. Any other advise would be awesome too.

It's do-able, but you will be a single Mom and he will not really see his kids grow up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am also married to doctor, he did a surgical residency than a two year fellowship. Unlike pp dr's wife, I'd encourage you to follow your dream. yes, it was be an hour intensive (but no where close to what it was like before the mandated hours restrictions for residency), but I have seen my husband's peers who are women and younger residents and fellows complete their training and have children. Once the training is complete, many of the woman surgeons and medical doctors I know are able to work p/t schedules that I'm completely envious of, and can't think of a single other professional occupation which comes close in terms of flexibility. Go for it!

Perhaps you are referring to me when you refer to the pp dr's wife. We know plenty of female surgeons. Best case scenario, OP will finish med school at 35 and will start residency then. You don't know what you are talking about if you think OP will be able to have kids during surgical residency.

Ok, I'll be sure to tell that to my friends that had kids during their surgical,residency.

NP here, yes I am a female physician in a surgical sub specialty and had a child at the mid-point of my residency. Having local family and a flexible nanny were key parts of making this work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am also married to doctor, he did a surgical residency than a two year fellowship. Unlike pp dr's wife, I'd encourage you to follow your dream. yes, it was be an hour intensive (but no where close to what it was like before the mandated hours restrictions for residency), but I have seen my husband's peers who are women and younger residents and fellows complete their training and have children. Once the training is complete, many of the woman surgeons and medical doctors I know are able to work p/t schedules that I'm completely envious of, and can't think of a single other professional occupation which comes close in terms of flexibility. Go for it!

Perhaps you are referring to me when you refer to the pp dr's wife. We know plenty of female surgeons. Best case scenario, OP will finish med school at 35 and will start residency then. You don't know what you are talking about if you think OP will be able to have kids during surgical residency.

Ok, I'll be sure to tell that to my friends that had kids during their surgical,residency.

NP here, yes I am a female physician in a surgical sub specialty and had a child at the mid-point of my residency. Having local family and a flexible nanny were key parts of making this work.

OP here, did you go to med school after undergrad or a few years later? From what I've read here, I'd have to have a kid during med school if I want to accomplish it by 35.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am also married to doctor, he did a surgical residency than a two year fellowship. Unlike pp dr's wife, I'd encourage you to follow your dream. yes, it was be an hour intensive (but no where close to what it was like before the mandated hours restrictions for residency), but I have seen my husband's peers who are women and younger residents and fellows complete their training and have children. Once the training is complete, many of the woman surgeons and medical doctors I know are able to work p/t schedules that I'm completely envious of, and can't think of a single other professional occupation which comes close in terms of flexibility. Go for it!

Perhaps you are referring to me when you refer to the pp dr's wife. We know plenty of female surgeons. Best case scenario, OP will finish med school at 35 and will start residency then. You don't know what you are talking about if you think OP will be able to have kids during surgical residency.

Ok, I'll be sure to tell that to my friends that had kids during their surgical,residency.

PP here. It was hard enough having DH be a surgical resident while I gave birth to our first child while he was a resident. I could not imagine being the mother giving birth and taking care of a baby during surgical residency. I am not saying it is impossible. of course it is possible. I have met female surgeons who send their babies to live with the grandparents. My best friend's parents are surgeons. She has bad memories of her childhood when her parents would leave her with her grandparents. She has a lot of issues with that as an adult. Her younger sister, currently a surgical resident and engaged to a fellow surgeon, was born after residency and does not harbor the same ill feelings towards their parents. Also know many female ortho surgeons who graduated med school in their 20's, finished training in their early-mid 30's and had babies then. OP's timeline is off for childbearing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am also married to doctor, he did a surgical residency than a two year fellowship. Unlike pp dr's wife, I'd encourage you to follow your dream. yes, it was be an hour intensive (but no where close to what it was like before the mandated hours restrictions for residency), but I have seen my husband's peers who are women and younger residents and fellows complete their training and have children. Once the training is complete, many of the woman surgeons and medical doctors I know are able to work p/t schedules that I'm completely envious of, and can't think of a single other professional occupation which comes close in terms of flexibility. Go for it!

Perhaps you are referring to me when you refer to the pp dr's wife. We know plenty of female surgeons. Best case scenario, OP will finish med school at 35 and will start residency then. You don't know what you are talking about if you think OP will be able to have kids during surgical residency.

Ok, I'll be sure to tell that to my friends that had kids during their surgical,residency.

PP here. It was hard enough having DH be a surgical resident while I gave birth to our first child while he was a resident. I could not imagine being the mother giving birth and taking care of a baby during surgical residency. I am not saying it is impossible. of course it is possible. I have met female surgeons who send their babies to live with the grandparents. My best friend's parents are surgeons. She has bad memories of her childhood when her parents would leave her with her grandparents. She has a lot of issues with that as an adult. Her younger sister, currently a surgical resident and engaged to a fellow surgeon, was born after residency and does not harbor the same ill feelings towards their parents. Also know many female ortho surgeons who graduated med school in their 20's, finished training in their early-mid 30's and had babies then. OP's timeline is off for childbearing.

I've seen this too. My husband is a physician and had fellow (female) residents who sent their kids to live 2 or 3 states away with grandparents at 8 weeks of age!!! It happened more than once.
Women surgeons can be a breed of their own (no offense to those who posted earlier in this thread).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am also married to doctor, he did a surgical residency than a two year fellowship. Unlike pp dr's wife, I'd encourage you to follow your dream. yes, it was be an hour intensive (but no where close to what it was like before the mandated hours restrictions for residency), but I have seen my husband's peers who are women and younger residents and fellows complete their training and have children. Once the training is complete, many of the woman surgeons and medical doctors I know are able to work p/t schedules that I'm completely envious of, and can't think of a single other professional occupation which comes close in terms of flexibility. Go for it!

Perhaps you are referring to me when you refer to the pp dr's wife. We know plenty of female surgeons. Best case scenario, OP will finish med school at 35 and will start residency then. You don't know what you are talking about if you think OP will be able to have kids during surgical residency.

Ok, I'll be sure to tell that to my friends that had kids during their surgical,residency.

NP here, yes I am a female physician in a surgical sub specialty and had a child at the mid-point of my residency. Having local family and a flexible nanny were key parts of making this work.

OP here, did you go to med school after undergrad or a few years later? From what I've read here, I'd have to have a kid during med school if I want to accomplish it by 35.

I was 35 when I had my first child. Looking back, it may have worked well to have my first during med school, but I was always waiting for the "right time", and as we all know, there is no perfect time (true with many professions).

[Anonymous]

Looks like the MD route may not be the best fit for me. Definitely upsetting. I have been applying to a few nonclinical positions at hospitals, so we'll see how it goes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Looks like the MD route may not be the best fit for me. Definitely upsetting. I have been applying to a few nonclinical positions at hospitals, so we'll see how it goes.

What about nursing? You could get through school in a couple years and select an office job if stamina is an issue.

[Anonymous]

Op, you aren't even married, right? Who knows if you will ever find a partner or even able be able to conceive. Do what you want with regards to career, and figure out how to fit in pregnancy etc when that is on the table. Having kids is tough regardless of your career path.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am also married to doctor, he did a surgical residency than a two year fellowship. Unlike pp dr's wife, I'd encourage you to follow your dream. yes, it was be an hour intensive (but no where close to what it was like before the mandated hours restrictions for residency), but I have seen my husband's peers who are women and younger residents and fellows complete their training and have children. Once the training is complete, many of the woman surgeons and medical doctors I know are able to work p/t schedules that I'm completely envious of, and can't think of a single other professional occupation which comes close in terms of flexibility. Go for it!

Perhaps you are referring to me when you refer to the pp dr's wife. We know plenty of female surgeons. Best case scenario, OP will finish med school at 35 and will start residency then. You don't know what you are talking about if you think OP will be able to have kids during surgical residency.

Ok, I'll be sure to tell that to my friends that had kids during their surgical,residency.

PP here. It was hard enough having DH be a surgical resident while I gave birth to our first child while he was a resident. I could not imagine being the mother giving birth and taking care of a baby during surgical residency. I am not saying it is impossible. of course it is possible. I have met female surgeons who send their babies to live with the grandparents. My best friend's parents are surgeons. She has bad memories of her childhood when her parents would leave her with her grandparents. She has a lot of issues with that as an adult. Her younger sister, currently a surgical resident and engaged to a fellow surgeon, was born after residency and does not harbor the same ill feelings towards their parents. Also know many female ortho surgeons who graduated med school in their 20's, finished training in their early-mid 30's and had babies then. OP's timeline is off for childbearing.

PP, it sounds like you may have had a particularly difficult experience. I know families that had multiple kids during residency. I'm sorry you had a hard time, but that is hardly universal (three of my close friends are married to surgeons and they all have four kids). And none of the female surgeons I knew sent their kids off to be raised by grandparents. And things are more manageable now for most residents with the hours restrictions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Looks like the MD route may not be the best fit for me. Definitely upsetting. I have been applying to a few nonclinical positions at hospitals, so we'll see how it goes.

How about becoming a PA?

Education and training are a fraction of what is required to become a surgeon.

Hospital administration may not be bad if you already have a business background.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Looks like the MD route may not be the best fit for me. Definitely upsetting. I have been applying to a few nonclinical positions at hospitals, so we'll see how it goes.

How about becoming a PA?

Education and training are a fraction of what is required to become a surgeon.

Hospital administration may not be bad if you already have a business background.

PA could be a possibility as long as I am able to accumulate at least 1,000 observation hours of patient care. I am contacting someone who is in a similar situation tomorrow. Granted, she's five years younger, but any piece of advice helps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Looks like the MD route may not be the best fit for me. Definitely upsetting. I have been applying to a few nonclinical positions at hospitals, so we'll see how it goes.

How about becoming a PA?

Education and training are a fraction of what is required to become a surgeon.

Hospital administration may not be bad if you already have a business background.

PA could be a possibility as long as I am able to accumulate at least 1,000 observation hours of patient care. I am contacting someone who is in a similar situation tomorrow. Granted, she's five years younger, but any piece of advice helps.

That is only half a year compared to 5+ years of training after med school.

[Anonymous]

Wow!
OP you could be me.
I'm a year older than you so 30, but lately I have had the same regret.