Children's activities that are a money pit

[Anonymous]

My 16 yr old niece just announced to my sister and my BIL that is quitting gymnastics. Started at age 2 and became competitive in early elementary. My sister was sure my niece was super passionate about it and wanting to go to the olypmics. Private lessons, coaches, training camps, team and competitive fees for the past 10 years pretty much gone over night.

[Anonymous]

Can some of you give prices for these activities? I am a new mom with an infant and curious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 16 yr old niece just announced to my sister and my BIL that is quitting gymnastics. Started at age 2 and became competitive in early elementary. My sister was sure my niece was super passionate about it and wanting to go to the olypmics. Private lessons, coaches, training camps, team and competitive fees for the past 10 years pretty much gone over night.

Well, at 16, the best of them are already winning the Olympics. Frankly, if you niece hasn't made it at this point, she might as well quit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can some of you give prices for these activities? I am a new mom with an infant and curious.

There seem to be 2 levels no matter the activity: rec and club. Rec tends to be once a week in a public facility so reasonable for most people. It's the club level that costs money-- cost for the club to rent or own a facility for practice, paid coaches vs volunteers, specialized equipment ( my skates were $2000 for custom vs rentals), and of course the actual travel-- flights, hotels, car rentals, gas. It adds up quick.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do not consider children's activities a "money pit". This is gift to your children that hopefully they will retain for the rest of their lives. I still remember the Steven Foster songs I learned on the piccolo. Not glamorous like the piano but I remember the music camps and over night travels with the marching band. It only becomes a money pit if the child is not benefiting from the activity. But participating, even in so-so classes, there are lessons to be learned... how to interact with others, team building especially for girls. This the is time to try everything, because they probably will not have the time when they are grown.

OP here, for better or worse, many people have to live within a budget. After watching more experienced parents struggle with this issue, I'm concerned about starting a certain activity, that the child ends up really enjoying, and then getting in over our heads financially. What starts out as just a Saturday morning activity, turns into a travel team, hotel rooms, new equipment every year etc. Perhaps the rest of the peer group can fully participate and others are left out.....

My parents spent money on tennis lessons for me as a child. I was good enough to play on a competitive high school team, but have barely played since. Although I enjoyed it at the time, I wonder if it really affected the trajectory of my life.

I'm working on making practical decisions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 16 yr old niece just announced to my sister and my BIL that is quitting gymnastics. Started at age 2 and became competitive in early elementary. My sister was sure my niece was super passionate about it and wanting to go to the olypmics. Private lessons, coaches, training camps, team and competitive fees for the past 10 years pretty much gone over night.

Well, at 16, the best of them are already winning the Olympics. Frankly, if you niece hasn't made it at this point, she might as well quit.

That is so ridiculous. Actually both posts are. Most kids activities don't lead to the Olympics and that is what should be expected. You shouldn't sign kids up for any activity expecting the Olympics or a college scholarship. And activities that don't lead to those things are still valuable experiences.

[Anonymous]

Don't ever have a kid in competitive-level figure skating.

[Anonymous]

CREW!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am the ruiner of dreams.

So many parents I know think their dc has a chance to be a professional in whatever sport the kid is interested in. The number of deluded adults I know is amazing. They don't realize the staggering odds against their dc making it on anything beyond a high school team. I've seen parents discuss this at sporting events and saw one mom cry and a dad walk away enraged when a group was discussing how unlikely any of us would know a kid who made it in professional baseball or football.

Forget tennis. If your kid isn't playing competitive tournaments by 9 or 10 you are sol. Even then the probability of your child doing anything other than making a high school team is so so small.

In the burbs here, it is not unusual for parents to pay for private coaching for little league.

+1 by 9, 10, or 11 you need to be breaking state records if you wan to go pro.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nothing is more expensive than horses. Not even close.

+ $3000mth x years

[Anonymous]

OP here, for better or worse, many people have to live within a budget. After watching more experienced parents struggle with this issue, I'm concerned about starting a certain activity, that the child ends up really enjoying, and then getting in over our heads financially. What starts out as just a Saturday morning activity, turns into a travel team, hotel rooms, new equipment every year etc. Perhaps the rest of the peer group can fully participate and others are left out.....

My parents spent money on tennis lessons for me as a child. I was good enough to play on a competitive high school team, but have barely played since. Although I enjoyed it at the time, I wonder if it really affected the trajectory of my life.

I'm working on making practical decisions.

For us, OP, it was fencing. We let our DS do a bunch of different things last year and he fell in love with that one. I quickly realized it was such a money suck and told him we'd revisit it later and sword fight with him at home. The teacher spent 1/3 of the entire allotted class time getting the kids outfitted and TAKING ATTENDANCE. I complained but they kept doing it that way. I think we paid over $100 for a 6 week class and he fenced for maybe 10-15 minutes a week. Felt like a fool, and hated that he adored it so much only to take him out. I just couldn't see spending that much. Oh, and they kept taking another 10 minutes of class time to try and talk us into a "membership".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the ruiner of dreams.

So many parents I know think their dc has a chance to be a professional in whatever sport the kid is interested in. The number of deluded adults I know is amazing. They don't realize the staggering odds against their dc making it on anything beyond a high school team. I've seen parents discuss this at sporting events and saw one mom cry and a dad walk away enraged when a group was discussing how unlikely any of us would know a kid who made it in professional baseball or football.

Forget tennis. If your kid isn't playing competitive tournaments by 9 or 10 you are sol. Even then the probability of your child doing anything other than making a high school team is so so small.

In the burbs here, it is not unusual for parents to pay for private coaching for little league.

+1 by 9, 10, or 11 you need to be breaking state records if you wan to go pro.

Hey Sloane Stephens didn't start playing tennis until she was 9. As long as a parent has the money it's ok to live in lala land.

[Anonymous]

I think activities are wonderful gifts. However, Ruiner of dreams- I agree wholeheartedly with you that your kids shouldn't participate in activities if you can't afford them. I'm the $3K per year piano poster and I'd be very sad if I couldn't afford lessons- but they are a luxury. We make $225K per year so it's okay. I don't get the single moms who make $40K a year and have their kids participate in competitive cheer, ballet, gymnastics. It's just stupid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 16 yr old niece just announced to my sister and my BIL that is quitting gymnastics. Started at age 2 and became competitive in early elementary. My sister was sure my niece was super passionate about it and wanting to go to the olypmics. Private lessons, coaches, training camps, team and competitive fees for the past 10 years pretty much gone over night.

Well, at 16, the best of them are already winning the Olympics. Frankly, if you niece hasn't made it at this point, she might as well quit.

Well I agree and I think my niece did too. But her parents were blinded by their own ambition for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think activities are wonderful gifts. However, Ruiner of dreams- I agree wholeheartedly with you that your kids shouldn't participate in activities if you can't afford them. I'm the $3K per year piano poster and I'd be very sad if I couldn't afford lessons- but they are a luxury. We make $225K per year so it's okay. I don't get the single moms who make $40K a year and have their kids participate in competitive cheer, ballet, gymnastics. It's just stupid.

some low income families do not pay for those the same as you do.