Did your kid enjoy process of applying to colleges?

Anonymous
My kid was engaged in the process (influenced by self motivation together with motivated peer group and pushy parents). Ended up at their first choice and so happy (applied early to an ivy). Super happy with result but i dont think they 'enjoyed' the process at all. The most enjoyable college tours were when they were much younger and they didn't really have any stress- was just a fun excursion. During hs, tours were a drag- squeezed into weekends and vacations, tours all begins to sound the same, weather was either super hot (summer tours) or empty campuses (spring break tours). Spent all senior fall writing essays in every free moment- tons of EA schools due Nov 1, ED/REA app, and school counselor made kids have essays done for all RD schools by Dec bc ED odds were low. Kid slogged through, kept up q1 grades and was lucky to celebrate in Dec with good news. Lots of pressure and little sleep for kids who are super busy with outside interests. Schools may say they don't care about demonstrated interest, but strong essays require a lot of time and research to show you know the school/program and while being able to show how you will fit, will take advantage of opportunities, etc. Imo, It's a lot if BS and unnecessary stress on kids.
Anonymous
DD really enjoyed the visits, as did we. In fact, the visits are what shifted her from feeling anxious and scared about college to feeling excited, which put her in a good headspace for starting apps.

She did a few interviews and enjoyed most of them with the exception of one at a safety. Most of the interviews added to her excitement about various schools.

I don't think she would say that she "enjoyed" the application process. The hardest time was when she was starting the essays over the summer and experienced the reality check of needing to draft/redo/revise to a degree she never had before for school writing. There were one or two tear-filled evenings over this. But I think she felt competent with the process overall and seemed to feel pleased with her finished product. She completed all of her apps by mid-November (9 schools) and was admitted to her ED, which I'm sure helped. Probably also helped that her stats were high for her ED and she felt pretty confident about admittance. Full disclosure - she had a college counselor who did a great job coaching her through planning and pacing all the steps. This kept everyone's stress levels down considerably.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:DD really enjoyed the visits, as did we. In fact, the visits are what shifted her from feeling anxious and scared about college to feeling excited, which put her in a good headspace for starting apps.

She did a few interviews and enjoyed most of them with the exception of one at a safety. Most of the interviews added to her excitement about various schools.

I don't think she would say that she "enjoyed" the application process. The hardest time was when she was starting the essays over the summer and experienced the reality check of needing to draft/redo/revise to a degree she never had before for school writing. There were one or two tear-filled evenings over this. But I think she felt competent with the process overall and seemed to feel pleased with her finished product. She completed all of her apps by mid-November (9 schools) and was admitted to her ED, which I'm sure helped. Probably also helped that her stats were high for her ED and she felt pretty confident about admittance. Full disclosure - she had a college counselor who did a great job coaching her through planning and pacing all the steps. This kept everyone's stress levels down considerably.


Junior parents: be prepared for some "wonderrrrrrful" moments -DP
Anonymous
It wasn’t that bad - kid was very organized and kept to a schedule. Accepted to REA so the process was relatively short and not stressful.
Anonymous
Not sure DD enjoyed it, but the process turned out to be much easier than expected. Started and finished standardized testing the summer before junior year. Did all college visits in sophomore and junior year. Wrote essays the summer before senior year. Applied early to dream school and got accepted. Enjoying senior year and helping friends with their essays/applications.
Anonymous
16:47 aren't you so special 🙄
Anonymous
Enjoy the process? Absolutely not!!! The amount of work and stress was not healthy, but I do think the process definitely makes a kid more resilient, more self aware and grounded in reality. Thankfully (and luckily), my kid had a great outcome. From my perspective, it's far easier for kids/families who don't care much about the particular school outcome or for those who are super connected with lots of support and resources. For my kid it was a total grind but they are now feeling happy that their work and effort was recognized and worth the sacrifices they made. I (parent) personally enjoyed parts of the process like learning about schools and opportunities and I loved the school visits. But I always tried to temper my enthusiasm for schools because I didn't know if they would get accepted or not. Its a hard balance....
Anonymous
Treat it like another class senior year. It's a great writing "class."
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:It’s like childbirth, you forget how bad it was.

I’m going through it with my 2nd kid again and all of the old “what a complete PIA, and insufferable process with schools really stringing kids along this is ….”

I had forgotten .


I had to laugh at this. I have 2 kids just 2 years apart and was surprised how much I forgot (blocked out?) between the 1st and 2nd.

And now that kid 2 is done (thanks to ED!) I am glad I can forget everything.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It’s like childbirth, you forget how bad it was.

I’m going through it with my 2nd kid again and all of the old “what a complete PIA, and insufferable process with schools really stringing kids along this is ….”

I had forgotten .


I had to laugh at this. I have 2 kids just 2 years apart and was surprised how much I forgot (blocked out?) between the 1st and 2nd.

And now that kid 2 is done (thanks to ED!) I am glad I can forget everything.


What if they decide to attend grad plus schools?
Anonymous
No, it's been awful and draining.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Parent of a junior here. For those who've gone through this, is there anything that you think helped ease the process, or would have in retrospect? I'm trying to pay attention to which schools notify early (like Pitt, or those with EA that give an answer by Christmas)--seems like getting a couple acceptances from places a kid likes can be so psychologically helpful. I'm wondering if it even makes sense to check out the ultra-reach schools with single-digit acceptances, or just forget about them. Worth trying to apply to as few schools as possible? Are there benefits to forgoing ED? With a junior I feel like we are "supposed to" hunt for a first choice for ED purposes.

Any advice is most welcome.


My DS was a very good but not spectacular applicant from a CA public school and emphasized fit: location, size, demography and program.

Applying EA to several schools was hugely important. He got an EA acceptance from a school he liked the same day he was deferred ED1 which took the sting away. Apply EA to all schools that offer it if your kid likes them and emphasize that getting admitted to one is a great outcome in case reaches and targets go south.

It is essential to show demonstrated interest to all schools that consider it, even those with higher admission rates, because no school wants to be safety and may reject if they think you are using it as one.

My DS got admitted to a Top 30 private ED2 after several EA acceptances. It was the best possible outcome and I think it happened because he demonstrated in his essays and LORs that he understood the values of the schools and showed that he shared them.
Anonymous
Visits were very enjoyable - 1 on 1 time, good meals, see area around school. DH and I took turns bc we both wanted to do them.

Re early admissions - Pitt is great but must apply in Sept ( if not sooner). Macalester was a target for my kid - results 12/20, which is nice for winter holiday.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:16:47 aren't you so special 🙄


Why so cranky? Applying to college doesn’t need to be stressful and unpleasant. Unless you want to make it that way…with your attitude.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It’s like childbirth, you forget how bad it was.

I’m going through it with my 2nd kid again and all of the old “what a complete PIA, and insufferable process with schools really stringing kids along this is ….”

I had forgotten .


I had to laugh at this. I have 2 kids just 2 years apart and was surprised how much I forgot (blocked out?) between the 1st and 2nd.

And now that kid 2 is done (thanks to ED!) I am glad I can forget everything.


On my 4th. It sucks so bad.
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