So torn about TJ advice to child

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Base schools send many students to top schools too.

Did the millionth time, if college admission is your main goal stay at the base school. That’s not the entire point of TJ.

I am saying that most NOVA base schools are not without merit. Don't be so defensive about TJ.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Base schools send many students to top schools too.

I posted the above comment and I am not OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Base schools send many students to top schools too.

Did the millionth time, if college admission is your main goal stay at the base school. That’s not the entire point of TJ.

I am saying that most NOVA base schools are not without merit. Don't be so defensive about TJ.

???
I didn’t say they are without merit. In fact I said if your main goal is maximizing college placement then most strong TJ candidates probably SHOULD stay at their base school as they will stand out more there. I’m saying going to TJ should any be decided thinking it will maximize college placement.

[Anonymous]

^ shouldn’t

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Base schools send many students to top schools too.

Did the millionth time, if college admission is your main goal stay at the base school. That’s not the entire point of TJ.

I am saying that most NOVA base schools are not without merit. Don't be so defensive about TJ.

???
I didn’t say they are without merit. In fact I said if your main goal is maximizing college placement then most strong TJ candidates probably SHOULD stay at their base school as they will stand out more there. I’m saying going to TJ should any be decided thinking it will maximize college placement.

This is correct if and only if the student is STEM-only and relying on the fact that they go to TJ as their separator.

As I’ve said many times here, TJ makes a phenomenal third line on a college resume, but a fairly mediocre first line.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Base schools send many students to top schools too.

Did the millionth time, if college admission is your main goal stay at the base school. That’s not the entire point of TJ.

I am saying that most NOVA base schools are not without merit. Don't be so defensive about TJ.

???
I didn’t say they are without merit. In fact I said if your main goal is maximizing college placement then most strong TJ candidates probably SHOULD stay at their base school as they will stand out more there. I’m saying going to TJ should any be decided thinking it will maximize college placement.

This is correct if and only if the student is STEM-only and relying on the fact that they go to TJ as their separator.

As I’ve said many times here, TJ makes a phenomenal third line on a college resume, but a fairly mediocre first line.

That's ironic. TJ is for STEM yet STEM students shouldn't go because they won't stand out?
Please remind me what the three lines are so that I don't have to read the entire thread.

[Anonymous]

And you can a great TJ experience and get into a top college - bc ya' know TJ SHOULD be servicing those kids. I agree that shouldn't be the end game but don't count it out. Also agree (and my kid did got to Caltech or MIT) that college was easier that TJ according to my kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a scientist, MIT grad and my kid got in to TJ.

I'm so torn about how to advise on it. My high school experience was fine but the way they structured sports and intense academics meant you had to choose and absolutely couldn't do both. I also couldn't do band with my schedule conflicts. I was unhappy to give up sports.

My child loves sports, loves music and is very gifted but not entirely as self-motivated as I once was. Motivated enough to register to take the exam.

I did a competitive sport at MIT and was able to balance the academic load but they also structured sports to not conflict with academics. I also did not have a 5.0 at MIT.

Anyone else have the same concerns?

May TJ kids participate in sport. My DC was asked several time to join a team and other DC plays in sport. It would have been harder to qualify in base school. So it is doable for both sports and music.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I also went to TJ and currently have a first year in college and a sophomore in high school (neither of whom went to TJ). My concern with your child is the lack of self-motivation as that’s probably the #1 trait I’d attribute to success at TJ.

NP. Thanks for this. DC has applied and gotten in but he's certainly not one of the "top students". He's self-motivated in that he has taught himself a lot of things outside of school but finds most of his classes pretty boring and doesn't put much effort in them. Is TJ the right fit for him? Is any high school?

It could be.
It is hard to develop passion without challenge.
We all talk about wanting our kids to find their passion but it is actually very hard to find and almost impossible if you are skating through life.
If I thought my child would find their passion but get lower grades at tj, I would encourage my child to go.
Don't be as concerned about where your child goes to college as much as where they go to grad school.
Unless they go to HPSY+, nobody cares about undergrad, they want to know about your grad school.
Tj will prepare them for college as well or better than any of the expensive prep schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What your kid probably saw were senior research projects. Many, many kids at TJ play sports and do marching band. They do just fine, actually better in many cases, than the kids who don’t. TJ is a tough place but it doesn’t require you to forgo normal high school experiences. I’ve had multiple kids there. They play sports, play instruments, and do plenty of other teen things. Let your kid decide. It’s fine either way!!

The athletes at TJ are having PHENOMENAL college admissions success this year. More evidence that it's a tremendous place to play sports. And the teams are extremely competitive in the National District.

There is some evidence that the athletic preferences at top schools are under more scrutiny and they are looking for students that can be competitive athletes rather than athletes that can be competitive students.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many TJ students do a sport, instrument, and get good grades. What did your child think of the open house?

To be honest, he got spooked at the end when he saw the research posters by some of the kids that won awards. I tried to explain that's not freshman-level kind of work but I don't know that he really bought what I was saying. He has a friend already attending, the kids were all very nice, and he liked the gym facilities.

Those are mostly senior projects. But there are gifted younger students who are doing advanced scientific research.

or at least their parents are...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess I'm most afraid that by him accepting he's giving up high school and being a kid in place of four years of additional college. TJ seems very collegiate to me. On one hand that's nice and preparatory. On another, it feels like skipping part of childhood.

NP. I would love to dig into this a little deeper if that's okay. In what sense are you worried about him "giving up high school"? I'm genuinely curious, as my TJ experience was outstanding once I was able to find my people.

It's also worth noting that accepting the offer of admission to TJ is not a four-year commitment. If it's not the right fit, he can absolutely leave and transition pretty seamlessly into his base school while being ahead of the game from an academic sense.

Less time for quintessential American high school traditions and more time spent on studying and academic pursuits. The low wage job learning the value of the dollar, working and hanging out at home after school with family and friends, sports, dating, service, and just doing kid stuff and messing up and learning from mistakes without as much pressure. It weird to be debating whether or not your child should attend a magnet school or work at the local hamburger joint, but if all feels rushed coming from a non-magnet school experience myself. I know many families have had this debate before for decades and there is no wrong answer. They can both work out positively.

I hear you. I don't want my kid to grow up either too fast either. I mean I only have 4 years left with them at home and if they go to TJ, they will spend those 4 years with their nose in a book and any free time will be spent with friends and extracurricular stuff. There won't be nearly as much time for family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess I'm most afraid that by him accepting he's giving up high school and being a kid in place of four years of additional college. TJ seems very collegiate to me. On one hand that's nice and preparatory. On another, it feels like skipping part of childhood.

NP. I would love to dig into this a little deeper if that's okay. In what sense are you worried about him "giving up high school"? I'm genuinely curious, as my TJ experience was outstanding once I was able to find my people.

It's also worth noting that accepting the offer of admission to TJ is not a four-year commitment. If it's not the right fit, he can absolutely leave and transition pretty seamlessly into his base school while being ahead of the game from an academic sense.

Less time for quintessential American high school traditions and more time spent on studying and academic pursuits. The low wage job learning the value of the dollar, working and hanging out at home after school with family and friends, sports, dating, service, and just doing kid stuff and messing up and learning from mistakes without as much pressure. It weird to be debating whether or not your child should attend a magnet school or work at the local hamburger joint, but if all feels rushed coming from a non-magnet school experience myself. I know many families have had this debate before for decades and there is no wrong answer. They can both work out positively.

Honestly, I did all of these things while I was at TJ:

- I worked summer camps over the summer;
- I hung out with friends doing extracurricular activities that I enjoyed after school;
- I played a varsity sport for two years, and sub-varsity the other two years;
- I volunteered through 8th period at a school right near TJ for kids with developmental disabilities;
- and I made a TON of mistakes.

...and I still graduated from my dream school four years after I left TJ.

The pressure cooker atmosphere and comparison culture is much less significant now than it used to be. The biggest thing I would repeat is that you don't want to play the "what if" game years down the road, wondering if your kid passed up on a golden opportunity. At least if he tries it and it doesn't work out, you'll know.

Dating, you didn't mention dating. or does that fall under the category of "a TON of mistakes"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Base schools send many students to top schools too.

Not exactly.

From 2015-2020
McLean sent 11 kids to Harvard Princeton or MIT
Langley sent 9...
Annandale sent 2
Academies of Loudon sent 2...

TJHSST sent 136.
TJHSST sent more kids to Harvard, Princeton, and MIT than every other high school in Fairfax, Arlington, Falls Church, Prince William and Loudon combined.
The low rate of acceptance to top schools is not necessarily the result of a bias against TJ. TJ is overwhelmingly asian and that can affect college admissions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And you can a great TJ experience and get into a top college - bc ya' know TJ SHOULD be servicing those kids. I agree that shouldn't be the end game but don't count it out. Also agree (and my kid did got to Caltech or MIT) that college was easier that TJ according to my kid.

Did your kid take upper level undergraduate courses starting freshman year like many other MIT students? If they took the bare minimum, it's not surprising it would be less challenging than TJ