Why are rich people, especially rich "soccer" moms so obsessed with...

[Anonymous]

A car with the small scratches that come with normal wear-and-tear isn't unusual, regardless of money.

It is weird to wring your hands over every tiny little mark that you have to be within 2 inches of the car to see.

"He doesn't drive it. He just rubs it with a diaper."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not fixing car damage, even if it's minor, is something you do when you don't have insurance and/or are too poor to afford it. It also looks irresponsible and sloppy/trashy.

Or it means you live in a dense or urban(ish) area where dings and dents are common. And you likely walk a lot so your car just isn’t some huge priority. Maybe you care about this sort of thing if you need to schlep yourself all around your exurb and worry about keeping your vehicle protected in your McMansion garage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you sure she was raised affluent? IMO, the people who are the most concerned about things like this are the ones who weren't raised wealthy and have something to "prove."

Don't have time to read whole thread, but I find the above so true. At my office some of the nicest and cleanest cars are driven by security personnel and the cleaning crew. IMHO, they drive way more car than one would expect for their salary. Meanwhile, lots of executives driving beat up Accords and Camrys.

I bet these executives are also wearing dirty underwear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My middle class friend is very particular about everything, and it would pain her to drive a car with a scratch. My similarly-minded father - same thing. None of them have ever been wealthy!

And me? I drive my battered 17 year old car everywhere and I don't feel bad about it I have significant assets, but I simply don't care about signs of wear in my house or my vehicles. I'd rather not deal with the hassle of cleaning and repair, unless it's a question of safety, which obviously trumps my lazy attitude. The car is fit to drive, but that's it. It's very ugly.

I do like nice clothes, though. To each his own, I suppose.

This is me. My car is over ten years old, scratched up to hell and kind of embarrassing to drive...kids don't like being seen it either. I had nice cars when I was young and had less money. Maybe my mistakes with money when I was young, taught me some lessons? I could afford a much nicer car, but really don't care that much about it. I also don't care abut clothes, but my mountain bike is probably worth more than my car.

I wouldn't be surprised if your house was the same, dirty and embarrassing. People that drive unkempt cars tend to be comfortable in unkempt places. The opposite is also true.
If you see someone wearing old dirty clothes, they are probably the same in other aspect of their life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My middle class friend is very particular about everything, and it would pain her to drive a car with a scratch. My similarly-minded father - same thing. None of them have ever been wealthy!

And me? I drive my battered 17 year old car everywhere and I don't feel bad about it I have significant assets, but I simply don't care about signs of wear in my house or my vehicles. I'd rather not deal with the hassle of cleaning and repair, unless it's a question of safety, which obviously trumps my lazy attitude. The car is fit to drive, but that's it. It's very ugly.

I do like nice clothes, though. To each his own, I suppose.

This is me. My car is over ten years old, scratched up to hell and kind of embarrassing to drive...kids don't like being seen it either. I had nice cars when I was young and had less money. Maybe my mistakes with money when I was young, taught me some lessons? I could afford a much nicer car, but really don't care that much about it. I also don't care abut clothes, but my mountain bike is probably worth more than my car.

I wouldn't be surprised if your house was the same, dirty and embarrassing. People that drive unkempt cars tend to be comfortable in unkempt places. The opposite is also true.
If you see someone wearing old dirty clothes, they are probably the same in other aspect of their life.

A car that's scratched on the outside doesn't need to be dirty on the inside. But you know that already.

Pretty sure PP isn't driving a car with cardboard taped over the rear windshield.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1. Driving a spotless, freshly-detailed car.
2. Refusing to drive a car with any physical damage, no matter how minor.

Example. We had friends over last night and the husband was teasing his wife for refusing to drive her SUV until he got it fixed because it had a huge scratch on it. You can tell she was raised in an affluent setting, very hoity-toity. It's not just her though, I remember hearing similar from my well-to-do grandmother about "not being caught dead" in a dirty or damaged car. And in the lineup at my children's private school, the cars are generally sparkling clean with glossy tires, and have no damage.

Where does this come from? Like they have a perception that dirty and/or dinged up cars are seen as low class?

Ask yourself what is your disdain for people who live differently than you, OP? Usually, it is a you problem - not a them problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not fixing car damage, even if it's minor, is something you do when you don't have insurance and/or are too poor to afford it. It also looks irresponsible and sloppy/trashy.

Or it means you live in a dense or urban(ish) area where dings and dents are common. And you likely walk a lot so your car just isn’t some huge priority. Maybe you care about this sort of thing if you need to schlep yourself all around your exurb and worry about keeping your vehicle protected in your McMansion garage.

This. Our car has a ton of "minor damage" just from parking in the city, as well as minor annoyances that we should probably get fixed but we drive so little we don't worry about it that much.

Insurance rarely covers minor damage anyway -- for most cars, fixing a minor dent or scratch will be out of pocket anyway because it won't cost enough to get you out of your deductible. We currently have a dinged windshield that we are debating fixing. It's a super minor ding and honest impede our ability to drive, and the thought of spending a few hundred on a new windshield for that seems silly and wasteful.

It has never occurred to me that anyone would look at something like that and think we were "sloppy/trashy". Knowing some people do think that makes me think less of them, not of myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you sure she was raised affluent? IMO, the people who are the most concerned about things like this are the ones who weren't raised wealthy and have something to "prove."

Don't have time to read whole thread, but I find the above so true. At my office some of the nicest and cleanest cars are driven by security personnel and the cleaning crew. IMHO, they drive way more car than one would expect for their salary. Meanwhile, lots of executives driving beat up Accords and Camrys.

I bet these executives are also wearing dirty underwear.

Who wears dirty underwear? What is wrong with you? There is absolutely no correlation between a car with a few dings in it and wearing dirty underwear.

Some of y'all have some weird puritanical ideas about cleanliness. Age and wear and tear are not the same as filth. You can live in a spotless but dated home. You can drive a spotless but beat up car. You can wear nothing but thrift store clothes that are impeccably cleaned. Having expensive, nice, or new things does not mean you have better hygiene. In fact it may mean you have worse? When I was in college and in my 20s, I remember some of my friends from very privileged backgrounds were sometimes the most unhygienic because they were used to having other people cleaning up after them all the time. I had a college roommate whose parents were loaded and who drive a brand new SUV (the only one of us in our suite with a car at all) and she was disgusting -- did not do her own laundry and thus constantly wore dirty clothes, would leave long strands of her hair all over our bathroom, leave plates of food out overnight, etc. She was used to having maid and laundry service, neither of which were available at our college in those days, and had no clue how to take care of her space or body without someone else doing most of the hard work.

Her car was nice, though, and she'd drive us all to her parents' ski cabin on the weekends in the winter -- she wasn't a bad person, actually pretty fun and generous, but not particularly hygienic. We had to teach her a bunch of stuff.

You all just sound ignorant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My middle class friend is very particular about everything, and it would pain her to drive a car with a scratch. My similarly-minded father - same thing. None of them have ever been wealthy!

And me? I drive my battered 17 year old car everywhere and I don't feel bad about it I have significant assets, but I simply don't care about signs of wear in my house or my vehicles. I'd rather not deal with the hassle of cleaning and repair, unless it's a question of safety, which obviously trumps my lazy attitude. The car is fit to drive, but that's it. It's very ugly.

I do like nice clothes, though. To each his own, I suppose.

This is me. My car is over ten years old, scratched up to hell and kind of embarrassing to drive...kids don't like being seen it either. I had nice cars when I was young and had less money. Maybe my mistakes with money when I was young, taught me some lessons? I could afford a much nicer car, but really don't care that much about it. I also don't care abut clothes, but my mountain bike is probably worth more than my car.

I wouldn't be surprised if your house was the same, dirty and embarrassing. People that drive unkempt cars tend to be comfortable in unkempt places. The opposite is also true.
If you see someone wearing old dirty clothes, they are probably the same in other aspect of their life.

No, house is nice. I just don’t care about my car.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not fixing car damage, even if it's minor, is something you do when you don't have insurance and/or are too poor to afford it. It also looks irresponsible and sloppy/trashy.

Or it means you live in a dense or urban(ish) area where dings and dents are common. And you likely walk a lot so your car just isn’t some huge priority. Maybe you care about this sort of thing if you need to schlep yourself all around your exurb and worry about keeping your vehicle protected in your McMansion garage.

But someone rich who lives in a big house in Kent has their own driveway and garage. When they go to work, they have a private garage. Your car being banged up from your lack of access to safe and private parking signals your lower status. Nobody sits there and analyzes your car damage — it’s just banged up and sketchy. And you’re fine with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My middle class friend is very particular about everything, and it would pain her to drive a car with a scratch. My similarly-minded father - same thing. None of them have ever been wealthy!

And me? I drive my battered 17 year old car everywhere and I don't feel bad about it I have significant assets, but I simply don't care about signs of wear in my house or my vehicles. I'd rather not deal with the hassle of cleaning and repair, unless it's a question of safety, which obviously trumps my lazy attitude. The car is fit to drive, but that's it. It's very ugly.

I do like nice clothes, though. To each his own, I suppose.

This is me. My car is over ten years old, scratched up to hell and kind of embarrassing to drive...kids don't like being seen it either. I had nice cars when I was young and had less money. Maybe my mistakes with money when I was young, taught me some lessons? I could afford a much nicer car, but really don't care that much about it. I also don't care abut clothes, but my mountain bike is probably worth more than my car.

Cope.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you sure she was raised affluent? IMO, the people who are the most concerned about things like this are the ones who weren't raised wealthy and have something to "prove."

Don't have time to read whole thread, but I find the above so true. At my office some of the nicest and cleanest cars are driven by security personnel and the cleaning crew. IMHO, they drive way more car than one would expect for their salary. Meanwhile, lots of executives driving beat up Accords and Camrys.

I bet these executives are also wearing dirty underwear.

Who wears dirty underwear? What is wrong with you? There is absolutely no correlation between a car with a few dings in it and wearing dirty underwear.

Some of y'all have some weird puritanical ideas about cleanliness. Age and wear and tear are not the same as filth. You can live in a spotless but dated home. You can drive a spotless but beat up car. You can wear nothing but thrift store clothes that are impeccably cleaned. Having expensive, nice, or new things does not mean you have better hygiene. In fact it may mean you have worse? When I was in college and in my 20s, I remember some of my friends from very privileged backgrounds were sometimes the most unhygienic because they were used to having other people cleaning up after them all the time. I had a college roommate whose parents were loaded and who drive a brand new SUV (the only one of us in our suite with a car at all) and she was disgusting -- did not do her own laundry and thus constantly wore dirty clothes, would leave long strands of her hair all over our bathroom, leave plates of food out overnight, etc. She was used to having maid and laundry service, neither of which were available at our college in those days, and had no clue how to take care of her space or body without someone else doing most of the hard work.

Her car was nice, though, and she'd drive us all to her parents' ski cabin on the weekends in the winter -- she wasn't a bad person, actually pretty fun and generous, but not particularly hygienic. We had to teach her a bunch of stuff.

You all just sound ignorant.

OP is talking about noticeable dings and dents, not just barely noticeable scratches. OP also doesn't like moms who clean and detail their cars.
If you are talking about minor scratches, that's fine, almost every car has them.

The correlation is that if you don't care about driving a car with dings, dents, scratches, you probably don't care about being neat and clean, so you are more likely to be ok wearing dirty underwear.

[Anonymous]

there is the notion that the way you take care of your possessions speaks to how you take care of yourself. While absolutely refusing to drive a car with a minor scratch may be a little absurd, it is a good character trait to keep your possessions living space clean and well maintained.

People that go around with broken phone screens and dented cars and dirty houses usually have underlying issues. The "broken" possessions are just outward signs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1. Driving a spotless, freshly-detailed car.
2. Refusing to drive a car with any physical damage, no matter how minor.

Example. We had friends over last night and the husband was teasing his wife for refusing to drive her SUV until he got it fixed because it had a huge scratch on it. You can tell she was raised in an affluent setting, very hoity-toity. It's not just her though, I remember hearing similar from my well-to-do grandmother about "not being caught dead" in a dirty or damaged car. And in the lineup at my children's private school, the cars are generally sparkling clean with glossy tires, and have no damage.

Where does this come from? Like they have a perception that dirty and/or dinged up cars are seen as low class?

Not being able to afford to get your car immediately fixed is a low class signal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:WE have two soccer playing kids. my husband and I both have well paying jobs, own a DC home, beach house and investment property and we drive shitboxes. I just can not be bothered to worry about a pristine car when I know the world will ruin it. So what's the point?

Our kids play two different travel sports. All the parents are driving luxury 3-row SUVs.